Call Her Daddy

Ariana Madix: The Vanderpump Affair (FBF)

March 13, 2026

Key Takeaways Copied to clipboard!

  • Ariana Madix discovered Tom Sandoval's affair by finding a screen-recorded FaceTime video of him and Raquel in his phone's camera roll while at Tom Tom. 
  • Ariana felt that Tom's immediate reaction after confrontation was to gaslight her and avoid accountability, which she recognized as a pattern from past betrayals. 
  • Ariana believes the rumor that she and Tom were in an open relationship likely originated from Tom himself, possibly as a tactic to justify his actions or manage the narrative. 
  • Ariana Madix believes Tom Sandoval secretly flew Raquel Leviss to his hometown of St. Louis multiple times while they were still dating, with his family potentially aware but not condoning the visits. 
  • Ariana admits she subconsciously turned a blind eye to potential infidelity, feeling assisted in this by Tom shooting down her concerns and the expectation that she shouldn't have to constantly check his phone. 
  • Ariana felt the apology from Raquel was 'sub par' and rehearsed, while Tom's apology was focused on his own perceived victimhood and the effort he put into maintaining the house (like changing air filters), rather than genuine remorse for the affair. 
  • Ariana Madix is focused on achieving independence, success, and becoming a solo homeowner following the events discussed in the *Ariana Madix: The Vanderpump Affair (FBF)* episode of *Call Her Daddy*. 
  • Ariana hopes that the public conversation surrounding her experience will encourage women to unite and recognize their collective strength. 
  • Ariana expressed slight apprehension about how she might be perceived in the upcoming reunion episode, though she ultimately blacked out during the filming. 

Segments

Introduction and Backstory Setup
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(00:00:00)
  • Key Takeaway: The host provides essential context on Ariana Madix’s nine-year relationship with Tom Sandoval and the betrayal involving Raquel before the interview begins.
  • Summary: The episode of Call Her Daddy features Ariana Madix to discuss the affair between her former boyfriend, Tom Sandoval, and her close friend, Raquel. The host emphasizes the depth of the relationship, noting they planned to spend their lives together and had a house and dogs. Ariana is presented as the crucial voice needed to detail the events that have become a massive public scandal.
Discovery of the Affair
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(00:05:41)
  • Key Takeaway: Ariana discovered the affair after being handed Tom’s phone at a concert and finding a screen-recorded FaceTime video of them in his camera roll.
  • Summary: Ariana recounts being asked to hold Tom’s phone at a concert, which led to a moment she felt was ‘divine intervention’ compelling her to look. She initially checked his messages with no findings but then opened his camera roll, leading to the discovery of incriminating content. She immediately confronted him outside the venue, leading to a chaotic scene where he took her phone.
Immediate Aftermath and Confrontation
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(00:11:09)
  • Key Takeaway: During the confrontation, Ariana called Raquel, who revealed the affair started after a girls’ trip coinciding with the death of Ariana’s dog, Charlotte.
  • Summary: After retrieving her phone, Ariana called Raquel, who admitted the affair began after a girls’ trip, which Ariana notes was the time her dog, Charlotte, passed away. Sheena intervened, taking Ariana’s phone and joining the call, leading to a four-way phone conversation in the Uber ride home. Tom was dismissive and defiant toward Sheena’s involvement during this confrontation.
The Night at Home
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(00:14:17)
  • Key Takeaway: The night of the discovery involved hours of fighting, with Tom exhibiting gaslighting behavior while Ariana was emotionally devastated.
  • Summary: Ariana and Tom slept in separate rooms that night, and the argument continued until about 6 a.m. Ariana observed that when someone is caught lying, their natural response is often to gaslight the accuser and avoid accountability. She noted that the subsequent on-camera finale conversation felt less raw than the initial 48 hours of fighting.
Relationship Dynamics and Insecurities
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(00:19:01)
  • Key Takeaway: Ariana initially found Tom endearing for his earnestness but later struggled with his lack of verbal affirmation regarding her body and personality.
  • Summary: Ariana described their relationship as being ‘apocalypse buddies’ but admitted that Tom’s failure to verbally compliment her led to her feeling insecure, especially after a previous partner criticized her body. She recalled asking him for specific compliments, which he often deflected, leading her to question if he desired her or just the act of sex.
Couples Therapy and Tom’s Narrative
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(00:29:51)
  • Key Takeaway: Tom initiated couples therapy while already having the affair, claiming it was part of his plan to eventually end the relationship, which Ariana disputes based on their subsequent behavior.
  • Summary: Ariana confirmed that Tom initiated couples therapy, which she believed was helping her heal through inner child work, making his later claims that the therapy was a precursor to a breakup seem disingenuous. She points out that they were still intimate and celebrating their anniversary in January, contradicting his narrative that he was trying to break up with her months prior.
Mental Health Weaponization
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(00:51:23)
  • Key Takeaway: Ariana was angered by Tom claiming he couldn’t break up with her due to her threats of self-harm, noting he did nothing to help her when she was genuinely struggling.
  • Summary: Ariana strongly refuted Tom’s claim that she threatened suicide to prevent a breakup, stating that while she has dealt with suicidal ideation, he never reached out to her support system when she was in dark places. She found it awful that he weaponized her mental health struggles, especially when he was simultaneously betraying her with her best friend.
Open Relationship Rumors Origin
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(00:56:33)
  • Key Takeaway: The rumor that Ariana and Tom were in an open relationship likely stemmed from Tom telling Raquel that they were, which Raquel then shared with a mutual friend.
  • Summary: Ariana believes Tom planted the open relationship narrative, which was then spread by Raquel, who reportedly told someone she would rather hook up with Ariana than Tom. Ariana noted that this rumor was brought up during a group conversation with friends, where Tom vehemently denied ever suggesting such an arrangement.
Past Cheating Rumors & St. Louis Visits
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(01:00:26)
  • Key Takeaway: Tom Sandoval secretly brought Raquel Leviss to his hometown of St. Louis more than once while dating Ariana, possibly using a hotel.
  • Summary: Ariana confirmed knowing about past cheating rumors, including one in Miami when they were not official. She now believes a San Diego hookup rumor was true, and learned Tom brought Raquel to St. Louis multiple times. Tom allegedly put Raquel up in a hotel there, suggesting his family might have known at some point.
Billie Lee Situation & Other Contacts
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(01:02:42)
  • Key Takeaway: Ariana trusts that Billie Lee would not have been involved with Tom, and no other women have reached out to her since the scandal broke.
  • Summary: Ariana stated she does not believe anything happened between Tom and Billie Lee, having discussed it with Billie Lee directly. She has not been contacted by any other women claiming to have hooked up with Tom. Ariana expressed that if women had slept with him, she wouldn’t blast them publicly, placing the responsibility on the person in the relationship.
Turning a Blind Eye & Trust Issues
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(01:04:34)
  • Key Takeaway: Ariana admits she subconsciously turned a blind eye to issues, feeling assisted by being shot down when raising concerns and by Tom’s defense that she didn’t ‘follow’ him.
  • Summary: Ariana acknowledged that she was given assistance in ignoring red flags, often being dismissed when she brought up concerns. She questioned the level of effort required in a relationship, stating she shouldn’t have to stalk her partner to know what they are doing. This dynamic led to feeling like the ‘psycho’ when questioning behavior, which the partner could then use against her.
Affair Locations and Schwartz’s Complicity
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(01:07:08)
  • Key Takeaway: Ariana believes a significant portion of the affair occurred at Tom Schwartz’s apartment, which she co-owned, and felt Schwartz was not being fully honest about it.
  • Summary: Ariana suspects more activity happened at Schwartz’s apartment than he admits, noting Tom felt comfortable there, especially since the recording took place there. She emphasized that the house was co-owned equally, rejecting the framing of it as solely ‘Tom’s house.’ She also noted that Tom’s devices were not connected to his iPad, suggesting deliberate concealment.
Defending Tom and Nostalgia Tainted
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(01:07:34)
  • Key Takeaway: Ariana defended Tom to protect his image and prevent people from thinking less of her for choosing him, but the affair has now tainted all past good memories.
  • Summary: Ariana admitted she defended Tom both to shield his reputation and to avoid judgment on her own partner-picking skills. She struggles to look back on their nine years with nostalgia because the betrayal makes her question if he respected her during those happy times. She misses the inside jokes and comfortability of their shared language.
Shady Moments and Guest Room Sex
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(01:11:14)
  • Key Takeaway: Ariana believes Tom had sex with Raquel in their guest room while she was sleeping in their shared bed upstairs.
  • Summary: Ariana recalled a moment where she joked about being in a ’thruple’ while Tom and Raquel were in a hot tub, which now feels like foreshadowing. She suspects Raquel used their guest bedroom frequently when visiting, and believes Tom left their bed to have sex with Raquel in that room while Ariana slept nearby.
Raquel’s Current State and Lack of Remorse
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(01:15:14)
  • Key Takeaway: Ariana now describes Raquel as ’lost and empty,’ believing her behavior has sometimes seemed sociopathic, and notes Raquel showed no genuine remorse for destroying her relationship.
  • Summary: Ariana stated she never truly knew Raquel, despite previously calling her kind and loyal. She feels Raquel’s behavior post-discovery seems empty and potentially sociopathic. Ariana felt Raquel’s apology was insufficient for an almost year-long affair, resembling an apology for a drunken mistake rather than a major betrayal.
Reunion Experience and Emotional State
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(01:29:48)
  • Key Takeaway: Ariana felt angry and numb during the reunion, but had already achieved closure beforehand because Tom’s betrayal made it easy to stop caring about him.
  • Summary: Ariana felt a strange sense of confidence going into the reunion because she and her friends (Sheena, Lala, Katie, James) were united. Listening to Raquel was painful because she seemed disconnected from reality, suggesting both Tom and Raquel believed people would simply get over the situation. The severity of the betrayal made it easier to achieve closure quickly.
Weaponization of Mental Health and Tom’s Plan
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(01:36:36)
  • Key Takeaway: The most hurtful thing Tom said was weaponizing Ariana’s past struggles with her mental health, which was part of an elaborate plan to break up with her while painting himself as the victim.
  • Summary: Ariana cited Tom weaponizing her mental health struggles as the most hurtful aspect of the reunion. She believes Tom and Schwartz had a master plan to end the relationship under the guise of relationship issues (like lack of sex) without mentioning the affair. Ariana is grateful she discovered the truth before their planned narrative took hold.
New Fling and Post-Breakup Healing
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(01:51:45)
  • Key Takeaway: Ariana is seeing someone new she met shortly after the breakup, emphasizing that taking time to grieve does not preclude accepting happiness and quality time from a new connection.
  • Summary: Ariana is enjoying seeing someone new who lives in New York, whom she met at a wedding shortly after the breakup. This new person prioritizes quality time and honest conversation, which she deeply missed in her previous relationship. She advises listeners that there is nothing wrong with accepting happiness while grieving, provided boundaries are clearly communicated.
Future Independence Goals
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(01:58:03)
  • Key Takeaway: Ariana Madix explicitly desires to be an independent solo homeowner.
  • Summary: Ariana confirms that her focus remains on being independent and successful, achieving goals she previously held. She specifically states her desire to own her own home with no one else listed on the deed. This ambition is framed as a positive step forward following recent life events.
Personal Identity Beyond Scandal
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(01:58:38)
  • Key Takeaway: Ariana wants the public to know she is a real person who loves rosé, Beyoncé, and dreams of the French countryside.
  • Summary: When asked what people should know about her outside the scandal, Ariana listed simple pleasures like long walks on the beach and loving rosé. She acknowledged that reality TV is over-the-top but emphasized that she is fundamentally a ‘perpetually barefoot girl from Florida.’ She expressed a strong belief in women uniting, stating they are unstoppable when they team up.
Reunion Anticipation and Fear
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(02:00:35)
  • Key Takeaway: Ariana expressed slight concern about appearing ’too cutthroat’ during the reunion taping, which she largely blacked out during.
  • Summary: The host expressed admiration for Ariana’s composure during a painful time and suggested the betrayal was ultimately a blessing in disguise. Ariana voiced a minor fear about how her behavior during the reunion might be perceived by viewers. She admitted to blacking out during the taping, noting that others expected her to be less confrontational than Lala.