The Jordan Harbinger Show

1218: Grandson is Feral and Puts In-Laws In Peril | Feedback Friday

October 3, 2025

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  • The enabling behavior of the in-laws (Kate and David) in Question 1, stemming from fear and potential guilt over past abuse, actively prolongs the dangerous cycle involving their violent grandson, Michael. 
  • For the engaged couple in Question 1, respecting the in-laws' boundaries may require accepting the painful reality that they must prioritize their own safety and future plans independent of unreliable parental support. 
  • In Question 3, the malicious sharing of private medical information and cruel speculation about the unborn child by the coworker (Naomi) likely constitutes unlawful harassment based on pregnancy, a protected class, warranting strong documentation and HR intervention. 
  • When dealing with workplace harassment, the recommended strategy is to document everything and let HR handle the situation, rather than re-engaging directly, especially when feeling unsafe. 
  • Many difficult life decisions framed as binary choices (A or B) should be re-evaluated to find a 'third way' or recognize that the underlying mindset and habits are often more important than the specific choice itself. 
  • The Jade Travel Yoga Mat and Jade Voyager mat are highly recommended for their superior grip, portability, and cushioning, even for non-yoga activities like calisthenics. 

Segments

Feedback Friday Introduction
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(00:01:02)
  • Key Takeaway: The Jordan Harbinger Show’s Friday format focuses on listener advice, soundbites, and addressing ‘villains’ submitted by the audience.
  • Summary: The Friday episode of The Jordan Harbinger Show is dedicated to ‘Feedback Friday,’ where the host and producer address listener letters. This format includes offering advice and playing soundbites related to problematic situations sent in by listeners. The show aims to turn wisdom from weekly long-form interviews into practical advice.
Abusive Grandson Case
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(00:02:16)
  • Key Takeaway: A 32-year-old grandson, abused as a child, violently fractured his 70-something grandfather’s ribs after years of escalating aggression, including prior threats involving a firearm.
  • Summary: The first letter details a situation where the in-laws adopted their violent, abusive grandson, Michael, who is now 32 and has a history of domestic violence and felon status. Following an argument where Michael threatened his grandfather with a gun, he physically assaulted David, fracturing two of his ribs. Despite this ’last straw,’ the grandparents are enabling him by co-signing an apartment, illustrating a deep-seated pattern of accommodation.
Enabling and Boundary Setting
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(00:09:33)
  • Key Takeaway: The in-laws’ continued enabling of Michael is likely driven by fear of his reaction and an inability to confront feelings of guilt or failure regarding his upbringing.
  • Summary: The hosts suggest that the in-laws’ refusal to enforce boundaries stems from being more afraid of Michael and Julia than protecting themselves, possibly informed by guilt over Julia’s childhood abuse. The listener and Keith must confront the in-laws about why drawing boundaries is so difficult, recognizing that their current support is prolonging Michael’s chaos. The ‘right thing’ involves clearly stating that the enabling behavior is unacceptable and being prepared to distance themselves if the in-laws refuse to change.
LDR Relationship Logistics
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(00:25:58)
  • Key Takeaway: A single mother in a stable long-distance relationship must weigh the stability of her current life against the potential benefits of moving to join her motivated partner, factoring in her children’s high school commitments and her mother’s support.
  • Summary: The second letter concerns a single mother whose long-distance relationship with a high-functioning partner is complicated by his inability to relocate due to his federal job in DC. The decision involves whether to move her high school-aged children, disrupting their established lives (like gymnastics), or waiting until graduation, while also considering the impact on her mother who helps with childcare. The hosts advise focusing on the process of making the decision collaboratively with her children rather than seeking a single ‘perfect’ outcome.
Workplace Retaliation and Harassment
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(00:39:48)
  • Key Takeaway: A coworker maliciously spreading private pregnancy news and making cruel, speculative comments about the unborn child and stepson’s disability constitutes unlawful harassment based on a protected class (pregnancy).
  • Summary: The third letter details a junior employee, demoted after bullying trainees, retaliating by spreading the senior employee’s private pregnancy news and making vile comments about her stepson’s medical issues and the unborn child. An HR expert confirmed this behavior likely rises to the level of unlawful harassment because it is based on pregnancy and disability, protected classes. The recommended action is meticulous documentation of all incidents for HR, as this behavior is severe enough to warrant termination.
Workplace Harassment Protocol
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(00:51:58)
  • Key Takeaway: When feeling unsafe from a harasser at work, the correct procedure is to stop engagement, document the behavior, and let HR manage the situation.
  • Summary: If a person feels unsafe around a harasser at work, they should not re-engage in separate conversations but instead ask the person to stop and flag the issue with the company. The speaker expresses eagerness for HR to receive documentation against the colleague named Naomi. The advice emphasizes that colleagues are likely to be compassionate toward the pregnant employee being targeted by bizarre rumors.
Handling Toxic Coworkers
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(00:53:11)
  • Key Takeaway: Toxic individuals who are petty, insecure, and mean-spirited are described as ’energy vampires’ and a ‘cancer’ in an organization that must be removed if they cannot change.
  • Summary: The colleague Naomi is characterized as a ’loony tune biach’ who is petty and mean-spirited, suggesting her gossip holds no credibility with coworkers. Listeners are advised to document the ‘BS,’ focus on their work and pregnancy, and not let energy vampires dominate their time and attention. People who cannot engage respectfully must be cut out of the organization.
Sponsor Segment: Shopify & Progressive
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(00:54:36)
  • Key Takeaway: Shopify offers integrated AI tools for e-commerce, and Progressive simplifies bundling home and auto insurance to potentially save hundreds of dollars.
  • Summary: Shopify powers millions of businesses and provides templates, AI tools for product descriptions, and marketing assistance, covering inventory and shipping logistics. Progressive allows users to quickly check eligibility for savings by bundling home and auto policies. Listeners are encouraged to support sponsors via jordanharbinger.com/deals.
Recommendation: Jade Yoga Mats
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(00:56:37)
  • Key Takeaway: The Jade Travel Mat and Jade Voyager mat are highly recommended for their exceptional grip, light weight (around three pounds for the travel version), and eco-friendliness.
  • Summary: The speaker is addicted to Jade yoga mats, particularly the travel version, which is thin, light, and offers the best grip, preventing slippage even when sweating. The Jade Voyager is an even lighter version, suitable for yoga, HIIT, or use as a cushion. The grip quality was confirmed by a colleague during calisthenics.
George Saunders’ Advice on Choices
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(00:58:35)
  • Key Takeaway: Artistic and life questions framed as a dichotomy (A or B) are often best answered by resisting the binary and finding a ’third way’ that cuts through the opposition.
  • Summary: George Saunders’ newsletter addressed a doctor struggling between pursuing writing or staying in medicine, prompting a discussion on binary decision-making. The core insight is that feeling compelled to choose A or B often means neither option is satisfactory, suggesting the opposition itself might be an error. This mindset shift can reduce anxiety and channel energy toward the actual work or relationship, potentially revealing a better path or a way to do both.
Show Wrap-up and Credits
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(01:05:36)
  • Key Takeaway: George Saunders recently won the National Book Award for Distinguished Contribution to American Letters, validating his impact on literature and life philosophy.
  • Summary: The host celebrates George Saunders’ prestigious award, noting it is well-deserved given the book’s impact on how to live well, not just write. The segment concludes by reminding listeners of past episodes and providing contact information and disclaimers. The show’s motto, ‘We rise by lifting others,’ is reiterated before signing off.