Most Replayed Moment: Buddhist Monk Reveals How To Break Free From Pain and Anger!

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• Suffering can be transformed into a source of strength and joy by shifting focus from the narrative (the story of the past) to the raw physical sensation of the feeling itself, meeting it with compassion instead of resistance.  Copied to clipboard!
• Forgiveness is an act of self-liberation, as holding a grudge is likened to holding a hot coal, where the person holding the grudge is the one continually suffering the pain.  Copied to clipboard!
• Buddhist philosophy suggests that our natural state is compassionate, and by clearing away intellectual distractions (stories, judgments), we can access this inherent kindness to hold our own pain, like tending to a wounded animal, which leads to self-acceptance and strength.  Copied to clipboard!

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Wi-Fi Criticality and Sponsorship Plug

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(00:00:00)

• Key Takeaway: Fast, reliable internet is mission-critical infrastructure for modern content production and business operations, not merely a convenience.
• Summary: Fast Wi-Fi is essential for Steven Bartlett’s workflow, especially when transferring large podcast footage files to the London editing team. He emphasizes that reliable internet is ‘absolutely business mission critical.’ Spectrum Business is highlighted as the provider chosen for the new LA studio due to steady connection and cost-effectiveness.

Buddhism on Identity and Victimhood

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(00:01:18)

• Key Takeaway: Buddhism posits that identity and past suffering are not solid realities, offering a path away from victimhood by focusing on the present moment.
• Summary: Victimhood involves creating a solid identity around past injustice, whereas Buddhism teaches that the past is an illusion and the self is constantly changing. Meditation helps one cling less to the past and future, recognizing that perceived solidity in life is illusory, similar to concepts in particle physics.

Alleviating Emotional Burdens

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(00:04:50)

• Key Takeaway: Alleviating emotional burdens like grief or heartbreak requires dropping the narrative surrounding the feeling and focusing directly on the physical sensation.
• Summary: Gelong Thubten’s practice involves looking at the feeling rather than analyzing the story behind it, a realization solidified during a four-year silent retreat. Initially, trying to analyze past memories worsened his suffering, leading him to the brink of leaving the retreat.

Rock Bottom and New Approach

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(00:07:51)

• Key Takeaway: True transformation in dealing with suffering occurs only after hitting rock bottom and committing to a radically new, non-story-based approach to engagement.
• Summary: After experiencing severe depression and panic attacks, Gelong Thubten attempted to flee his retreat, realizing he was tormenting himself by focusing on the narrative of his past. He returned only after gaining clarity that he needed a new method to work with his suffering, viewing the pain as a potential breakthrough.

Meditating on Pain Itself

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(00:12:05)

• Key Takeaway: Turning the physical sensation of pain into the object of meditation, bypassing judgment and narrative, allows one to move toward the suffering and initiate release.
• Summary: Instead of trying to remove the ‘knife’ of suffering, the new approach was to focus meditation directly on the sensation, bypassing judgments like ‘I don’t like this.’ This acceptance, which initially sounded grim, leads to chemical changes where endorphins arise as stress hormones (cortisol) decrease.

Self-Compassion and Love

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(00:15:42)

• Key Takeaway: True happiness arises from sending love and tenderness into the place of self-hatred and pain, akin to caring for a frightened, injured animal.
• Summary: The practice evolved into holding the internal pain with love, visualizing holding a frightened rabbit or bird with a broken wing, something the speaker had never done for himself. This self-kindness contrasts sharply with his past driven by self-hatred and the need for external validation.

Applying Practice to Grief and Loss

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(00:18:36)

• Key Takeaway: The practice of sending love into physical pain was instrumental in navigating the intense grief, anger, and despair following the murder of his teacher and friend.
• Summary: Gelong Thubten applied the meditation technique to the overwhelming grief and anger following the murder of his teacher, Akon Rinpoche, who was killed by a former monk. Sending love into the ‘flames’ of despair calmed the experience and aided in achieving peace and forgiveness.

Practical Steps for Sending Love

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(00:23:04)

• Key Takeaway: The practical application involves focusing on the physical sensation of trauma without judgment, then flooding that sensation with loving attention, recognizing the mind’s natural compassionate state.
• Summary: The technique requires focusing on the physical feeling (e.g., twisting knife, burning) as one would focus on the breath, bypassing thoughts of discomfort or history. This is possible because the mind’s natural state is compassionate; one must learn to offer oneself the same hand-holding offered to a grieving friend.

Forgiveness and Shifting Perspective

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(00:25:54)

• Key Takeaway: Forgiveness is a strength that frees the self from toxic rage, and it is more effective to forgive the feelings arising from past incidents than to focus on forgiving the perpetrators.
• Summary: Holding a grudge ensures the perpetrator ‘wins’ by causing continuous suffering to the holder. Forgiveness is about dropping one’s own burden, not condoning the act. Deepening forgiveness involves contemplating the suffering that propelled others to act badly, recognizing that everyone is driven by their own confusion.

Suffering as Transformative Compost

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(00:29:34)

• Key Takeaway: Suffering, like compost, is not something to be discarded but is the necessary material for mental transformation and growth.
• Summary: The suffering experienced has a use because it serves as the catalyst for mental transformation. Thinking deeply about the suffering of others who caused pain can lighten the burden of indignation. Meditation helps loosen the mental ‘glue’ binding one to feelings of rage and hurt.

Sponsor Read: NetSuite AI

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(00:33:47)

• Key Takeaway: NetSuite by Oracle embeds AI throughout financial systems, connecting accounting, inventory, and HR data to deliver smarter, cost-cutting insights.
• Summary: Businesses can utilize NetSuite’s AI connector to integrate their chosen AI with connected business data, allowing for automated routine tasks. Over 43,000 businesses use this platform to future-proof operations. A free guide, ‘Demystifying AI,’ is available at netsuite.com/Bartlett.