Life Kit

How to get better at staying off your phone

March 10, 2026

Key Takeaways Copied to clipboard!

  • Tune into your feelings when you get the urge to scroll, and if you feel bad, log off and choose an alternative activity like napping or talking to a friend. 
  • Increase the friction to make using your phone harder by turning off notifications, making the screen black and white, or using software/hardware blockers. 
  • Do not keep your smartphone, tablet, or computer in your bedroom overnight to improve sleep quality and avoid temptation before bed and upon waking. 

Segments

Introduction and Phone Habits
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(00:00:00)
  • Key Takeaway: Eliminating the phone from the bedroom is a crucial first step to breaking compulsive scrolling habits.
  • Summary: The host introduced the episode of Life Kit by sharing the success of using a separate alarm clock to remove the phone from the bedroom. This action was taken because even with app blocking, the phone served as a constant source of distraction, pulling the host back into scrolling old photos and texts. Expert Jose Briones noted that humans naturally crave the offline default, suggesting a desire to reclaim life from ‘smartphone tyranny.’
Mindfulness and Urge Surfing
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(00:01:30)
  • Key Takeaway: Mindfully tracking negative feelings associated with reaching for the phone is the first step toward reducing screen time.
  • Summary: Takeaway one emphasizes tuning into physical and emotional feelings before, during, and after scrolling sessions. Sammy Nichols suggests tracking prompts, noting that negative self-feelings often trigger logging onto social media like Twitter. When a bad feeling arises, the action should be to log off and ask what alternative activity would bring happiness, such as napping or talking to a friend.
Increasing Friction for Use
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(00:03:55)
  • Key Takeaway: Habit formation is stopped when the ability to perform the action is removed or made extremely difficult.
  • Summary: Takeaway two focuses on increasing friction to make phone use harder, based on behavioral scientist BJ Fogg’s research. Methods include turning off notifications, setting screens to black and white, or only accessing apps via a less convenient browser login. Further friction can be added by giving your screen time passcode to a trusted person or using software/hardware blockers like ClearSpace or the Brick puck.
Bedroom Phone Ban
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(00:07:20)
  • Key Takeaway: Keeping all digital devices out of the bedroom overnight significantly improves sleep quality for all ages.
  • Summary: Takeaway three mandates removing smartphones, tablets, and computers from the bedroom overnight, as research shows devices negatively impact sleep duration and quality. Psychologist Jean Twangi advises against scrolling before bed, upon waking, or during middle-of-the-night awakenings. If an emergency call is a concern, the phone can be placed out of reach across the room or outside the door with the ringer maximized.
Managing Social Pushback
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(00:09:35)
  • Key Takeaway: When reducing online availability, clearly communicate boundaries to loved ones to manage potential pushback and preserve meaningful relationships.
  • Summary: Takeaway four advises preparing for and clearly communicating boundaries when changing online behavior, framing the effort as necessary for personal health and better focus. Sammy Nichols notes that reducing social media use reveals which relationships are shallow versus those meant for the long haul, as true friendships will endure. Being more present in person often encourages others to be present too, strengthening connections.
Reclaiming Time and Life
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(00:11:35)
  • Key Takeaway: The time recovered from reduced phone use should be intentionally gifted to activities that align with one’s core values and interests.
  • Summary: Takeaway five frames the time saved from phone use as a gift to be reinvested in things that matter, as the sum total of attention paid equals one’s life. Oliver Berkman emphasizes that paying attention to things one does not value is giving away precious, limited time (about 4,000 weeks for an 80-year lifespan). Reclaimed time can be used for movement, hobbies, or hosting gatherings, as Priya Parker suggests hosting is a way to build longed-for community.
Episode Recap
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(00:14:05)
  • Key Takeaway: The five core strategies involve mindful feeling checks, increasing friction, banning phones from the bedroom, clear communication, and reinvesting time.
  • Summary: The recap summarizes the five takeaways: notice feelings when the urge strikes and resist scrolling; make phone use harder by increasing friction; keep all digital devices out of the bedroom overnight; prepare for and communicate boundaries regarding reduced availability; and dedicate recovered time to meaningful pursuits.