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[00:01:32.480 --> 00:01:40.880] A lot of us actually need to start to dismantle some of the identities we've taken on unknowingly.
[00:01:41.200 --> 00:01:49.920] You're listening to Side Hustle Pro, the podcast that teaches you to build and grow your side hustle from passion project to profitable business.
[00:01:49.920 --> 00:01:52.800] And I'm your host, Nikayla Matthews-Okome.
[00:01:52.800 --> 00:01:54.640] So let's get started.
[00:01:57.840 --> 00:01:58.480] Hey, friends.
[00:01:58.480 --> 00:01:59.040] Hey, welcome.
[00:01:59.040 --> 00:01:59.960] Welcome back to the show.
[00:01:59.960 --> 00:02:04.280] It's Nikayla here, and today we are diving into an episode with Monique R.
[00:01:59.680 --> 00:02:04.760] Shields.
[00:02:04.920 --> 00:02:12.280] Monique is an executive coach, founder of Seven Pines Leadership, and podcast host of Ambition Without Compromise.
[00:02:12.280 --> 00:02:19.480] She is committed to liberating the professional imaginations of women of color CEOs, founders, and leaders.
[00:02:19.480 --> 00:02:40.360] As a coach, Monique leverages her own entrepreneurial and executive experience, plus nearly a decade combined of training in coactive mindset coaching, motivational interviewing, interpersonal dynamics, team building, and communications to help her clients find higher forms of leadership and intention in their lives and their business.
[00:02:40.360 --> 00:02:55.480] Monique was formerly on staff at the Stanford Graduate School of Business as a facilitator for their Women in Management program, as well as at UC Berkeley's Haas School of Business as a leadership coach for current MBAs and alumni executives.
[00:02:55.480 --> 00:03:05.400] Prior to launching Seven Pines, Monique was the director of coaching and then the director of partnerships at Joyable, a mental health technology startup in San Francisco.
[00:03:05.400 --> 00:03:16.920] Monique understands what it means to move through fear and distraction, to clarify, communicate, and act on a unique definition of success that refuses to compromise what matters most.
[00:03:16.920 --> 00:03:20.760] And she brings this perspective to the work she does with her clients.
[00:03:20.760 --> 00:03:32.440] Specifically, Monique specializes in helping high-achieving women of color business owners and leaders, especially mothers, balance ambition and freedom without burning out.
[00:03:32.440 --> 00:03:42.520] So, I met Monique after she applied to be a VIP podcast coaching client, and we worked together last year, but our relationship has evolved to much more than that.
[00:03:42.520 --> 00:03:48.880] I see Monique as a true gift and a light that has come into my life, and she can be a light for you as well.
[00:03:48.880 --> 00:04:02.960] So, that's why I really wanted to share this episode and just hearing how she thinks and the clarity that she can bring in just a few moments of having a conversation or bringing up a topic that's challenging me right now.
[00:04:02.960 --> 00:04:08.000] I hope will help you guys to see why I just think that her brain is just phenomenal.
[00:04:08.000 --> 00:04:10.240] So, let's jump right into it.
[00:04:12.800 --> 00:04:14.320] All right, all right.
[00:04:14.320 --> 00:04:17.760] So, Monique, welcome officially to the guest chair.
[00:04:17.760 --> 00:04:18.320] Thank you.
[00:04:18.320 --> 00:04:21.040] I'm super excited to be here, Nikayla.
[00:04:21.360 --> 00:04:23.200] I am so excited to have you.
[00:04:23.200 --> 00:04:30.080] And let me tell you, I love looking at your crisp, clear camera.
[00:04:30.080 --> 00:04:32.560] And you know, I love your setup.
[00:04:32.560 --> 00:04:38.160] So, guys, if you're not already tuning in on YouTube, please go and check out Monique's setup.
[00:04:38.160 --> 00:04:42.080] But as we were speaking today, I'm rocking my Spelman blue.
[00:04:42.080 --> 00:04:45.920] I didn't go to Spelman, y'all, but coincidentally, I'm rocking that.
[00:04:45.920 --> 00:04:57.520] And I thought it would be remiss for us not to touch on the fact that you just are literally on the heels of coming off of your 20-year reunion from Spelman College.
[00:04:57.520 --> 00:04:58.320] Yes.
[00:04:58.320 --> 00:04:59.840] What are your reflections?
[00:04:59.840 --> 00:05:06.480] Just your brief reflections on Monique 20 years ago and Monique the woman today.
[00:05:06.480 --> 00:05:07.760] Ciao.
[00:05:07.760 --> 00:05:09.840] Well, I'm so, so happy to be here.
[00:05:09.840 --> 00:05:14.000] And I am honestly still coming down from that trip to Spelman.
[00:05:14.000 --> 00:05:14.960] 20 years.
[00:05:14.960 --> 00:05:21.760] I'm like, there's a version of me as 17 years old stepping onto that campus that I remember so, so well.
[00:05:21.760 --> 00:05:28.480] And she was mostly terrified, like mostly terrified.
[00:05:28.480 --> 00:05:31.240] I'm from a really small town in the Midwest.
[00:05:29.680 --> 00:05:34.360] There's a lot of the world that I have still not seen yet.
[00:05:34.360 --> 00:05:38.200] And just being in Atlanta alone was like a whole thing.
[00:05:38.200 --> 00:05:40.280] I was so, so excited to be there.
[00:05:40.280 --> 00:05:48.280] And then just amongst all of these young black women who were coming from, yeah, just a myriad backgrounds that I had.
[00:05:48.520 --> 00:05:53.000] I just had never been the diversity within the diversity of us like that before in my entire life.
[00:05:53.000 --> 00:05:56.760] And so, yeah, I just reflect on how mind-blown I was back then.
[00:05:56.760 --> 00:06:07.160] And then thinking about now how that's my norm and how that, you know, has obviously shaped a lot of what I do with my focus being on women of color.
[00:06:07.160 --> 00:06:17.960] I feel like I know us, you know, the courses and things that are just like requirements at Spelman, deepen a certain kind of understanding of our experience that I know supports the work that I do today.
[00:06:17.960 --> 00:06:21.800] But yeah, I mean, that place shaped me.
[00:06:21.800 --> 00:06:24.440] It shaped me and it's one of the best decisions I've ever made.
[00:06:24.440 --> 00:06:30.200] We are grateful to Spelman then because the work you are doing is so impactful.
[00:06:30.200 --> 00:06:35.160] And you guys, I mentioned in the intro how I consider Monique my unofficial coach.
[00:06:35.160 --> 00:06:37.320] She will be my coach one day.
[00:06:37.880 --> 00:06:46.520] But for now, I want to share with you all just how Monique has impacted my life in the time we've known each other.
[00:06:46.520 --> 00:06:50.760] So what was your initial career path coming out of Spelman?
[00:06:51.080 --> 00:06:56.200] Yeah, so I was an English major at Spelman, and I was a lost English major.
[00:06:56.200 --> 00:06:57.800] I wasn't one of those young majors that came in.
[00:06:58.680 --> 00:06:59.160] I know.
[00:06:59.160 --> 00:06:59.720] I didn't know.
[00:06:59.720 --> 00:07:01.320] I came in, I didn't know what I wanted to do.
[00:07:01.320 --> 00:07:07.240] And I just saw, I met some upperclassmen who were saying, well, you could go into publicity or you could go become a lawyer.
[00:07:07.320 --> 00:07:08.680] So I was like, okay, I could do those things.
[00:07:08.680 --> 00:07:09.880] I love words.
[00:07:09.880 --> 00:07:10.600] So I did that.
[00:07:10.600 --> 00:07:13.640] Actually, my first job out of school was at Simon Schuster Publishing.
[00:07:13.880 --> 00:07:19.760] I was, there was this kind of special rotational program for like fresh college graduates.
[00:07:19.760 --> 00:07:21.120] I remember being in that space.
[00:07:21.120 --> 00:07:36.640] And one of the things I think I learned most from my early experience of transitioning into publishing was like the critical value of relationships because one of the main reasons I got that job was there was a black woman who I interned for at CBS television.
[00:07:36.640 --> 00:07:45.200] And she had the CEO make a phone call on my behalf and said, Monique, at that time, my last name was Brantley.
[00:07:45.360 --> 00:07:47.760] Monique Brantley, you need to take a look at her resume.
[00:07:47.760 --> 00:07:50.800] She needs to have real consideration.
[00:07:50.800 --> 00:07:54.560] And I was like, oh, so this is how the world works for real.
[00:07:54.560 --> 00:07:57.120] Like this is these relationships really, really deeply matter.
[00:07:57.120 --> 00:07:58.960] So yeah, that's how I, that's how I started.
[00:07:58.960 --> 00:08:03.440] Now, from there, so you have dabbled in a few industries, like many of us, right?
[00:08:03.440 --> 00:08:05.840] You spent some time in banking.
[00:08:05.840 --> 00:08:07.760] How did that happen?
[00:08:08.080 --> 00:08:09.760] Girl, student loans.
[00:08:09.760 --> 00:08:14.480] I was like, the English publisher won't play.
[00:08:15.120 --> 00:08:15.680] Okay.
[00:08:15.680 --> 00:08:18.800] Spelman was like, you got some bills to pay.
[00:08:19.280 --> 00:08:22.960] So yeah, I love the time that I spent at Simon Schuster.
[00:08:23.120 --> 00:08:24.960] But publishing is not, it's not banking.
[00:08:24.960 --> 00:08:26.320] It's not raining dollars on you.
[00:08:26.320 --> 00:08:29.360] And it wasn't something that I was personally extremely passionate about.
[00:08:29.360 --> 00:08:32.720] And so I was like, okay, I need to go and secure some stability for myself.
[00:08:32.720 --> 00:08:35.760] And I had a bunch of friends who were bankers and working in finance.
[00:08:35.760 --> 00:08:40.880] And I was like, okay, I'm not a banker, but what are some of the back office opportunities that I can find?
[00:08:40.880 --> 00:08:51.360] So I moved into an asset management firm and I kind of became the everything person for it was a very small firm that was doing very, very well for itself.
[00:08:51.360 --> 00:08:54.720] I became the everything person for the CEO at the time.
[00:08:54.720 --> 00:08:55.360] And then I met.
[00:08:55.440 --> 00:08:56.880] Like the chief of staff?
[00:08:57.200 --> 00:09:03.400] Essentially, yeah, if there was a chief of staff, that's probably what I was because he used to just, I was interviewing people at the VP.
[00:08:59.840 --> 00:09:04.920] I'm like 23 years old.
[00:09:05.160 --> 00:09:08.120] Like he's having me do, help me organize data rooms.
[00:09:08.120 --> 00:09:09.080] I was doing all kinds of stuff.
[00:09:09.080 --> 00:09:11.080] I didn't have no business, but he really believed in me.
[00:09:11.080 --> 00:09:12.200] Shout out to Boris.
[00:09:12.200 --> 00:09:13.800] Shout out to my old boss, Boris.
[00:09:15.000 --> 00:09:15.480] Boris.
[00:09:15.720 --> 00:09:16.840] Shout out to Boris.
[00:09:16.840 --> 00:09:24.680] But yeah, then I moved into investment banking in the back office and I was doing like a lot of what we called data services management.
[00:09:24.680 --> 00:09:26.760] So all of the research and things that our bankers use.
[00:09:26.760 --> 00:09:27.880] I was managing all that stuff.
[00:09:27.880 --> 00:09:29.640] I was supporting the compliance team.
[00:09:29.640 --> 00:09:36.120] I was, I was doing all, I just became kind of like a Swiss Army knife person doing all the back office operational things.
[00:09:36.120 --> 00:09:38.280] So earned a lot and made money.
[00:09:38.280 --> 00:09:38.920] Oh, good.
[00:09:39.320 --> 00:09:40.360] I love to hear that.
[00:09:40.360 --> 00:09:40.920] Right.
[00:09:40.920 --> 00:09:53.560] At that time, were you starting to see yourself being driven to people understanding their whys, understanding, or just even observing how they could be more effective as leaders?
[00:09:53.560 --> 00:09:56.360] Was that when that seed started to be planted?
[00:09:56.680 --> 00:10:00.840] I think the seed was planted, but I don't know that I was aware of it at that time.
[00:10:01.400 --> 00:10:05.160] Because, as I said, I started out working even at Simon Schuster.
[00:10:05.160 --> 00:10:08.920] I was working for the SVP directly in the role that I had there.
[00:10:08.920 --> 00:10:11.160] I was only working with the most senior people.
[00:10:11.160 --> 00:10:17.800] And so that, what that did for me is it humanized the people who everybody's like, they're scared to step into their office.
[00:10:17.800 --> 00:10:19.240] They're scared to approach in the lunchroom.
[00:10:19.240 --> 00:10:21.000] I was like, oh, like, that's Joe.
[00:10:21.000 --> 00:10:22.440] That's, you know, that's Robin.
[00:10:22.440 --> 00:10:23.000] That's whoever.
[00:10:23.000 --> 00:10:24.440] Like, that's such and such.
[00:10:24.440 --> 00:10:29.720] They felt regular to me in a way that I think is unique to experience that early in my career.
[00:10:29.720 --> 00:10:35.320] And so I got to see my value to people at that senior level early on.
[00:10:35.320 --> 00:10:41.160] And I remember I did have like faint sort of musings of like, I could become like an advisor to leaders like this one day.
[00:10:41.160 --> 00:10:42.920] Like, these are regular people.
[00:10:42.920 --> 00:10:47.840] They need, they need regular people's support that they don't get access to.
[00:10:44.840 --> 00:10:50.320] So that's, I would say, the seed that was planted.
[00:10:50.640 --> 00:11:05.120] That is such a blessing because I remember being that age and starting and working at these companies and seeing the execs pass you in the elevator bank and having that like intimidation, like, oh my God, that's the CEO, that's the president.
[00:11:06.000 --> 00:11:12.720] So what a blessing to have that human interaction with them from an early stage in your career.
[00:11:12.720 --> 00:11:13.280] Yeah.
[00:11:13.280 --> 00:11:13.520] Yeah.
[00:11:13.520 --> 00:11:14.800] It made a difference.
[00:11:14.800 --> 00:11:26.880] One of the things I love about your story is the fact that you do what we often talk about on this show is when you are starting out, if you can have your company pay for training, do that.
[00:11:26.880 --> 00:11:30.960] Like squeeze as much as you can out of your resources, your benefits.
[00:11:30.960 --> 00:11:36.640] So which company or which role were you in when you pursued a certification in coaching?
[00:11:36.960 --> 00:11:42.720] So at that point, I had transitioned out of finance and I was working at a startup, as a matter of fact.
[00:11:42.720 --> 00:11:44.960] So at that start, it was a mental health startup.
[00:11:45.200 --> 00:11:46.560] I had become the director of coaching.
[00:11:46.560 --> 00:11:49.680] I was there for four years, helped build, I learned a lot of things entrepreneurally.
[00:11:49.680 --> 00:11:56.960] But in that time, I had a fantastic relationship with my boss, who was the COO, and we were in lockstep around my development.
[00:11:56.960 --> 00:12:03.520] And so, because what I wanted to do connected to what I was already doing coaching, but it was for mental health, right?
[00:12:03.520 --> 00:12:06.160] I was doing cognitive behavioral science stuff.
[00:12:06.160 --> 00:12:10.960] It was kind of an easy sell to bring that experience in-house.
[00:12:10.960 --> 00:12:14.560] So it's like we don't have anybody here who's actually certified in coaching.
[00:12:14.560 --> 00:12:16.240] Why don't I go get that for us?
[00:12:16.240 --> 00:12:16.720] Yes.
[00:12:18.560 --> 00:12:21.840] And then also planting the seeds for my future because that's something I take with me, right?
[00:12:21.840 --> 00:12:23.040] That's what we get to do.
[00:12:23.040 --> 00:12:24.640] So that's how that worked out for me.
[00:12:24.640 --> 00:12:25.120] Yeah, Kate.
[00:12:25.200 --> 00:12:28.560] How did you become the director of coaching?
[00:12:28.560 --> 00:12:29.720] Ciao.
[00:12:31.000 --> 00:12:31.640] Being there.
[00:12:31.720 --> 00:12:32.520] Did you love it?
[00:12:29.120 --> 00:12:36.280] You know, being in the things, being on top of the things, and raising my hand.
[00:12:36.360 --> 00:12:42.040] I think that's a big part of it as well is like, because I had that relationship with my boss.
[00:12:42.040 --> 00:14:05.760] it was clear you know like what i wanted what i was good at um how to utilize me my final year there was actually the director of partnerships because i start up life it was like that's what we needed and so that's how i became when i came back from maternity leave they're like okay you're director of partnerships now like okay cool well the two align because you're so in tune to people what they need and so i can see i can see that transferable shift happening but what i love about your experience is it is about what you've done but it it mostly is about who you are i think you innately have a gift right i think you are innately meant and called to do the work that you're doing and helping people to navigate ambition in this world that just they're just it's almost like you're on a you're in a video game and like you're just trying to go down you're just trying to drive down the street and then all of a sudden things just keep coming in your pathway that's what it feels like in all aspects of life right and so we need someone like you who does that and i don't want to talk in generalities so i would love for you to to kind of breakdown, what it means to be a coach, what it means to help people executive coach.
[00:14:05.760 --> 00:14:16.160] We can start there, right when you when you moved into executive coaching for places like fortune 500 companies or even when you were working at stanford, what does that look like?
[00:14:14.680 --> 00:14:22.240] So it looks a lot like I honestly, that early seed I was talking about that was planted.
[00:14:22.240 --> 00:14:27.520] It looks like creating space for someone's humanity to exist.
[00:14:28.160 --> 00:14:40.320] Because when we feel connected with the truth of who we are and how we actually feel, and then we get to know what we actually think and what our imaginations can bring us to, we get to dream forward that, you know, those big visions that we talk about.
[00:14:40.320 --> 00:14:44.800] So I see the role that I play as an executive coach as someone who's really unblocking.
[00:14:44.800 --> 00:14:52.160] Like I'm helping to create space for people to just be more fully expressed, be more of who they already are, right?
[00:14:52.480 --> 00:15:03.440] Because so many of the spaces that we're operating in, especially because I focus on women leaders, require us to contort ourselves or to occupy a certain kind of posture and to look a certain way and to be on.
[00:15:03.440 --> 00:15:06.880] So where do you have that space where you can really hear yourself, right?
[00:15:06.880 --> 00:15:14.240] Where you can really, because you're also already, you know, the women I'm working with are extremely capable, competent, high-achieving people, right?
[00:15:14.240 --> 00:15:25.920] But you can high achieve yourself into a very strange predicament, you know, going in the wrong direction if you haven't had time to actually re, you know, reassess, locate yourself, and get centered.
[00:15:25.920 --> 00:15:35.280] So that's, that's a big part of what I do is making sure that my clients don't go through that process alone and that they don't experience that extreme distancing from themselves.
[00:15:35.280 --> 00:15:37.360] They get to come back into themselves.
[00:15:38.000 --> 00:15:38.720] It's funny.
[00:15:38.720 --> 00:15:44.800] I was literally just talking to someone this week about that feeling of needing to be on.
[00:15:44.800 --> 00:15:47.360] And I just got back from a conference, actually.
[00:15:47.360 --> 00:15:53.040] So I was talking to the founder and organizer about, you know, when I walked in here, of course, I was in like business mode, right?
[00:15:53.040 --> 00:15:54.560] I'm like, oh, I'm used to this.
[00:15:54.560 --> 00:15:55.360] I do this, right?
[00:15:55.360 --> 00:15:55.920] I'm on.
[00:15:55.920 --> 00:15:56.400] I got it.
[00:15:56.400 --> 00:15:58.160] Like, I'm ready to show up.
[00:15:58.160 --> 00:16:10.760] And then after a few minutes and a couple hours of just being in the space with this particular group who was having, it was called the Side Hustle Economy Summit out in Indianapolis, hosted by Anthony Murdoch.
[00:16:10.760 --> 00:16:15.000] And I mean, what they're doing there is just so special.
[00:16:15.000 --> 00:16:18.360] And I said, wait, I could be myself.
[00:16:18.360 --> 00:16:30.200] It was like, this, like, and it's not like, and as I was trying to explain to him, it's not like I wasn't myself, but there's just something different when you realize, oh, I don't, there's nothing to prove here.
[00:16:30.520 --> 00:16:31.640] They believe me.
[00:16:31.640 --> 00:16:41.160] Whereas in some other, when you occupy some other spaces or predominantly white spaces at times, the first layer is, oh, I have to prove I belong here.
[00:16:41.160 --> 00:16:43.640] And then it's like, then you can let go on your guard.
[00:16:43.640 --> 00:16:48.360] But that needing to be on, so to speak, is a real thing.
[00:16:48.360 --> 00:16:50.520] And everyone can say, oh, just show up as yourself.
[00:16:50.520 --> 00:16:52.440] I don't have to prove anything to anybody.
[00:16:52.440 --> 00:16:56.520] That's just not the reality of some of these spaces that we go into.
[00:16:56.520 --> 00:17:00.440] Corporate spaces are not designed for anybody to be their full authentic selves.
[00:17:00.440 --> 00:17:07.480] You have to decide what pieces of you are safe here, what pieces of you are advantageous to share here.
[00:17:07.720 --> 00:17:10.360] But a lot needs to be held for you.
[00:17:10.360 --> 00:17:14.280] You need to, you know, it's, it's definitely a, you have to kind of design yourself a certain way.
[00:17:14.280 --> 00:17:15.000] It's just what it is.
[00:17:15.080 --> 00:17:16.760] And there's just too many characters.
[00:17:16.760 --> 00:17:19.880] Again, like the video game, you don't really know people.
[00:17:19.880 --> 00:17:23.160] So you have to decide what is safe to share with this character.
[00:17:23.160 --> 00:17:24.680] Who is this character, really?
[00:17:25.000 --> 00:17:27.800] You know, who are who is like the game of survivor, too?
[00:17:27.800 --> 00:17:33.400] Like, who, who's their alliance and what's going to happen with information that I give to them?
[00:17:33.400 --> 00:17:33.800] It is.
[00:17:34.200 --> 00:17:35.480] It is absolutely a game.
[00:17:35.480 --> 00:17:38.680] I love that you're sticking with this metaphor because it's like you can't ever forget that.
[00:17:38.680 --> 00:17:43.480] You really can't, you know, that we're playing a game and it's about learning the rules of that game.
[00:17:48.640 --> 00:17:55.120] How did you learn the rules of the game and also free yourself from that particular atmosphere?
[00:17:55.120 --> 00:17:56.000] You know what?
[00:17:56.000 --> 00:17:59.440] I think I never fully learned all the rules of the game.
[00:17:59.440 --> 00:18:01.040] Meaning, well, I shouldn't say learn.
[00:18:01.040 --> 00:18:03.040] I learned them, but I wasn't interested in them.
[00:18:03.040 --> 00:18:08.960] So I decided, I think fairly early on, like I said, I started a Viacom company, Simon  Schuster, huge.
[00:18:09.360 --> 00:18:14.080] Then I moved to a mid-size, you know, smaller firm, and then a mid-size investment bank.
[00:18:14.080 --> 00:18:23.040] Then I moved to a startup because I think I was just subconsciously backing my way out of large corporate settings because I was like, this is not really a fit for me long term.
[00:18:23.840 --> 00:18:30.560] And so, yeah, I think I was like, I don't really want to spend so much energy trying to play all of the games.
[00:18:30.560 --> 00:18:34.000] Now, look, any kind of work setting that you're in, there's always going to be some politicking.
[00:18:34.000 --> 00:18:41.360] There's always going to be, there's interpersonal dynamics you have to manage, but it's a very different game in these much larger spaces.
[00:18:41.520 --> 00:18:43.680] And that's also a big part of the work that I do with my clients.
[00:18:43.680 --> 00:18:48.800] It's like, I'm not the coach you go to when you just want to learn how to play the politics better.
[00:18:48.800 --> 00:18:50.640] I'm not the coach for that.
[00:18:50.640 --> 00:18:56.240] And I'm not, there's no judgment if that's like, girl, that's where I'm at and that's what I need to do is focus on these politics.
[00:18:56.240 --> 00:19:00.160] But I'm more so for the woman who is, I'm trying to free myself of these politics.
[00:19:00.160 --> 00:19:02.480] I want to occupy more of who it is that I am.
[00:19:02.480 --> 00:19:07.840] I want to make sure I'm choosing whether it's employment or starting my own business or growing my existing business.
[00:19:08.640 --> 00:19:11.280] A lot of my clients are entrepreneurs as well.
[00:19:11.280 --> 00:19:13.200] That it's, I'm writing my own rules.
[00:19:13.200 --> 00:19:16.880] This is a game that I'm designing.
[00:19:16.880 --> 00:19:17.360] Right.
[00:19:17.600 --> 00:19:35.960] And I do love that you say, you know, that you're not here to judge because something else I heard recently was actually at that same conference was we just have to remember, instead of shaming ourselves for decisions we have made or are about to make, that remember, a lot of these decisions are rooted in survival.
[00:19:36.120 --> 00:19:42.600] And you need to do what you need to do in that moment or in this moment to put your survival first, right?
[00:19:42.600 --> 00:19:46.200] Like you need income, you need a roof over your head, and all these other things.
[00:19:46.680 --> 00:19:57.560] However, when you do have space and time to be able to think beyond surviving to thriving, this is the conversation and this is the kind of coaching that you're here to do.
[00:19:57.560 --> 00:19:58.440] Absolutely.
[00:19:58.440 --> 00:19:59.160] Absolutely.
[00:19:59.160 --> 00:20:01.880] And sometimes it's about, you know, we're always in seasons, right?
[00:20:01.880 --> 00:20:09.720] I have lots of clients who are like, I came to this big company because there was a season I needed where I needed, I'm trying to, I'm going to have two, three kids, four kids.
[00:20:09.880 --> 00:20:12.680] And I want, I want the benefits package that goes with them four kids.
[00:20:12.840 --> 00:20:15.320] You know, and that's the IVF package sometimes.
[00:20:15.640 --> 00:20:16.040] Okay.
[00:20:16.120 --> 00:20:17.800] Hardened and leave package sometimes.
[00:20:17.800 --> 00:20:18.120] Yes.
[00:20:18.360 --> 00:20:19.720] Packages are real.
[00:20:19.720 --> 00:20:20.200] Okay.
[00:20:20.440 --> 00:20:23.320] And so, yeah, we do what we need to do.
[00:20:23.320 --> 00:20:34.360] And sometimes it's about like, but I've not lost sight of my North Star and how can I figure out how to still plant seeds in this season before I'm ready to necessarily like make the big leap or, you know, I want to backstep.
[00:20:34.360 --> 00:20:38.200] I know something you talk about a lot too, is just how we can baby step our way into transition.
[00:20:38.840 --> 00:20:43.320] So, um, so yeah, that's a big part of what I will share as well in my work.
[00:20:43.320 --> 00:20:49.560] That's timely too that you mentioned that because now I want to talk about your own transition into entrepreneurship.
[00:20:49.560 --> 00:20:51.400] First of all, what did you decide, right?
[00:20:51.400 --> 00:20:57.000] Like, do you remember when you decided, okay, I am going to take my skills and leave?
[00:20:57.320 --> 00:20:59.720] When I became a mom, that became really, really clear.
[00:20:59.720 --> 00:21:03.560] And like I said, I had a really wonderful experience at that startup that I was at.
[00:21:03.560 --> 00:21:04.760] I had a lot of support.
[00:21:04.760 --> 00:21:10.440] Like, they're the ones that help, you know, help subsidize and support me through my certification process and that sort of a thing.
[00:21:10.840 --> 00:21:17.120] Wonderful relationships grew a ton, but I also was still working for somebody else.
[00:21:14.840 --> 00:21:21.680] You know, I'm still working on somebody else's timeline and growing somebody else's business.
[00:21:22.000 --> 00:21:33.760] And I was like, I think I've taken what I needed to take from this season and I have everything that I need to place this bet on myself and yeah, reclaim ownership of my time.
[00:21:33.760 --> 00:21:35.680] I had lots of privileges in that, right?
[00:21:35.680 --> 00:21:42.160] You know, not even just even getting into the fact that I have like, you know, college degrees and good experiences and things like that on my resume.
[00:21:42.160 --> 00:21:52.240] I have a supportive spouse, you know, that was enabled me to make that pivot the way that I did without having to, you know, worry so, so much financially in that transition.
[00:21:52.240 --> 00:21:58.400] Although I never stopped earning, I always found ways, you know, I really wanted to feel like I was starting something viable.
[00:21:58.400 --> 00:21:58.640] Yeah.
[00:21:58.640 --> 00:22:04.320] And I have a network that I felt very, you know, confident in being able to tap to support me in that transition.
[00:22:04.320 --> 00:22:06.080] So those things really do matter.
[00:22:06.080 --> 00:22:07.680] But motherhood did it, girl.
[00:22:07.680 --> 00:22:10.080] I was like, oh no, this is what matters.
[00:22:10.080 --> 00:22:11.920] And I need to own all of my time.
[00:22:11.920 --> 00:22:14.880] Oh, I need to own all of my time.
[00:22:14.880 --> 00:22:15.680] Yes, I want all of my time.
[00:22:15.840 --> 00:22:16.800] Just some of it.
[00:22:16.800 --> 00:22:17.520] Yes.
[00:22:17.520 --> 00:22:19.200] You know, I relate to that.
[00:22:19.200 --> 00:22:20.880] Yes, ma'am.
[00:22:22.160 --> 00:22:23.600] You never stopped earning.
[00:22:23.600 --> 00:22:24.400] I love that.
[00:22:24.400 --> 00:22:28.960] I love that because that means you also, did you test out earning before you left?
[00:22:28.960 --> 00:22:30.720] Like, did some clients?
[00:22:30.720 --> 00:22:31.200] Yeah.
[00:22:31.200 --> 00:22:31.520] Yeah.
[00:22:31.840 --> 00:22:33.440] That looked like for you.
[00:22:33.440 --> 00:22:42.720] Well, as a part of my coaching certification, this is very typical for at least like the ones that are like accredited that you usually have to have a coach and it's a, it's a paid coaching relationship.
[00:22:42.800 --> 00:22:44.720] They give you like a student rate usually.
[00:22:44.720 --> 00:22:47.840] So I had gotten used to the idea of like paying for coaches.
[00:22:47.840 --> 00:22:50.960] And I also had the requirement then of also getting clients to pay me.
[00:22:50.960 --> 00:22:53.440] So it could be a, they were like, oh, you can get a five-dollar client.
[00:22:53.400 --> 00:22:54.560] You can, you can you can coach your friends.
[00:22:54.560 --> 00:22:55.440] I was like, no, no, no, no, no.
[00:22:55.520 --> 00:22:57.200] I'm starting a business.
[00:22:57.240 --> 00:23:01.400] I want to, I want to figure out how to begin having sales conversations.
[00:22:59.840 --> 00:23:04.040] So it was like second and third-degree sort of relationships.
[00:23:04.280 --> 00:23:12.520] I did coach like one friend, but um, coaching friends is tricky, so because you're too invested as a friend, so it's like it's hard to manage the boundaries there.
[00:23:12.520 --> 00:23:19.320] But, um, but yeah, I really it was important to me to feel like I'm running a business, like I'm starting an actual business.
[00:23:19.320 --> 00:23:29.560] And so, um, so yeah, I had a handful of early clients, I made the packages and things like very doable for someone who's like working full-time, earning her certification, momming, you know.
[00:23:29.560 --> 00:23:32.440] And then I also contracted with my company.
[00:23:32.440 --> 00:23:39.880] Once I had given them my timeline to exit, I contracted with them for an extra month or two to help transition because I hired someone to replace me.
[00:23:40.200 --> 00:23:44.760] And so those two things kind of combined, helped me build that financial bridge out.
[00:23:45.000 --> 00:23:55.960] And I will tell you also, I mean, I think when you come into this knowing whatever business it is that you're trying to start, that like I want to start a business, which means I need to transact.
[00:23:56.360 --> 00:24:01.880] You start behaving like someone who transacts, who actually earns for the value that they provide.
[00:24:01.880 --> 00:24:08.840] And you will, you'll start getting after, you start getting really creative about how you can continue to get paid more and more.
[00:24:08.840 --> 00:24:21.640] And it also really emboldened me to continuously raise my rates, to continuously look for possibility models in the marketplace, to not look for the lowest common denominator, but to look for like, what is the, what is the highest possibility?
[00:24:21.640 --> 00:24:22.120] Yeah.
[00:24:22.120 --> 00:24:25.640] Because people will try to tell you, well, you're new, so you probably don't want to charge me.
[00:24:26.040 --> 00:24:26.360] No.
[00:24:26.680 --> 00:24:28.120] And you know, I don't believe in that.
[00:24:28.120 --> 00:24:30.520] I'm like, wait a second, you're not new to Earth.
[00:24:30.520 --> 00:24:30.920] Okay.
[00:24:31.400 --> 00:24:34.240] You're not new to being a grown-up professional, right?
[00:24:34.520 --> 00:24:35.000] Okay.
[00:24:35.000 --> 00:24:36.240] All those experimentalists.
[00:24:36.760 --> 00:24:37.400] Okay.
[00:24:37.400 --> 00:24:37.880] No.
[00:24:38.440 --> 00:24:38.920] Yeah.
[00:24:39.160 --> 00:24:39.560] No.
[00:24:39.880 --> 00:24:44.360] But you said so many things that I want to unpack for a second.
[00:24:44.360 --> 00:24:46.320] I love looking for possibility.
[00:24:46.320 --> 00:24:46.880] What did you say?
[00:24:44.760 --> 00:24:48.960] Looking for possibility models.
[00:24:44.840 --> 00:24:50.320] Possibility models.
[00:24:50.560 --> 00:24:52.320] What does that mean for you?
[00:24:52.320 --> 00:24:54.160] Okay, so I'm going to give you a quick story, right?
[00:24:54.160 --> 00:24:55.040] Yeah, yeah.
[00:24:55.040 --> 00:25:01.840] So when I first started my coaching business, a girlfriend of mine happened to have a friend or a mentor who told her about these other coaches.
[00:25:01.840 --> 00:25:10.320] And she was like, hey, these coaches, these two women coaches, they happen to be two white women, have this like coaching program that they're starting to kind of mentor coaches.
[00:25:10.320 --> 00:25:11.840] And I learned a little bit about it.
[00:25:12.000 --> 00:25:14.320] The group was called Women and Money.
[00:25:14.320 --> 00:25:14.800] Yes.
[00:25:14.800 --> 00:25:16.560] And I was like, oh, I like the sound of that.
[00:25:16.560 --> 00:25:19.440] So what are we going to go and learn?
[00:25:19.440 --> 00:25:32.800] And I also was very interested because these were, I mentioned their race on purpose because white women have different kinds of access typically and maybe a different way of thinking about charging and about networking and about, you know, sort of how you manage opportunities.
[00:25:32.800 --> 00:25:38.720] And so just being in their presence, it wasn't, they gave me tons of like frameworks and books to read and da da da da.
[00:25:38.800 --> 00:25:48.720] There was one book that was really helpful to me, but just being in their presence and hearing how they move and getting little moments of mentorship where it's like, how much are you about to pitch for that contract?
[00:25:48.720 --> 00:25:50.400] No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
[00:25:50.400 --> 00:25:51.760] Make that times five.
[00:25:51.760 --> 00:25:52.160] Yeah.
[00:25:52.160 --> 00:25:52.880] The starting.
[00:25:52.880 --> 00:25:56.560] So that, what it showed me was, you know, these are, these are also mothers.
[00:25:56.560 --> 00:25:59.440] These are also women who had left corporate.
[00:25:59.440 --> 00:26:01.040] These were like, I just needed to see them.
[00:26:01.040 --> 00:26:04.960] And then I also wanted to push, you know, what I thought could be possible.
[00:26:04.960 --> 00:26:13.120] So just putting myself in the presence of people who are doing in close proximity, doing what it is that I wanted to do and at the level that I wanted to do it at.
[00:26:13.920 --> 00:26:16.720] I just kind of had to keep pushing and I continue to do that.
[00:26:17.040 --> 00:26:24.640] I'm never going to stop pushing what making sure that I put myself in the presence of things that expand who I believe I can be.
[00:26:24.640 --> 00:26:24.960] Yes.
[00:26:24.960 --> 00:26:40.440] And you've, that's one of the ways I think you have influenced my life in that I am inspired by you to really not only resource myself, we'll talk about that, but also keep pushing in the area of training and coaching.
[00:26:40.440 --> 00:26:49.560] And okay, who is doing something in the realm of what I'm doing that I want to learn from and not being afraid to invest?
[00:26:50.360 --> 00:26:52.120] Let's talk about that.
[00:26:52.760 --> 00:26:57.800] How do you the investments, Monique?
[00:26:57.800 --> 00:26:59.160] The investments.
[00:26:59.480 --> 00:27:00.120] Yes.
[00:27:00.120 --> 00:27:03.320] Like everybody is five-figure this, five-figure that.
[00:27:03.320 --> 00:27:05.720] I mean, I got to do it one at a time.
[00:27:07.480 --> 00:27:08.440] We can pace these.
[00:27:08.440 --> 00:27:16.360] Things about your approach to pacing yourself and investing so that you are growing as a business owner.
[00:27:16.360 --> 00:27:17.160] Well, I'll tell you what.
[00:27:17.160 --> 00:27:20.920] One thing I actually have taken from you, Nikayla, you mentioned this on one of your podcasts.
[00:27:21.320 --> 00:27:28.200] Maybe you've done mentioned this several times, but I know I heard it at least once come from you when you were talking about just-in-time investments.
[00:27:28.760 --> 00:27:33.320] And that's something that I kind of hold with me as well, because it's not about doing everything all the time.
[00:27:33.320 --> 00:27:36.040] You can't, you know, I do that sometimes still.
[00:27:36.120 --> 00:27:36.520] I get caught.
[00:27:36.520 --> 00:27:38.360] I'm like, let me just go ahead and get this course too.
[00:27:38.680 --> 00:27:41.400] And then I don't have time to do this little course on top of that.
[00:27:41.560 --> 00:27:43.400] You can also meet incredible people, right?
[00:27:43.400 --> 00:27:44.200] Like, that's what I'm saying.
[00:27:44.200 --> 00:27:47.240] I'm like, ooh, Monique, save me a spot.
[00:27:47.240 --> 00:27:47.720] I'm coming.
[00:27:48.040 --> 00:27:49.160] Well, I'm coming.
[00:27:49.160 --> 00:27:52.040] But I got some just-in-time work that I need to do right now.
[00:27:52.520 --> 00:27:53.000] Yes.
[00:27:53.000 --> 00:27:53.480] Yes.
[00:27:53.480 --> 00:27:56.840] And just trusting that, you know, what's for you right now or what matters most.
[00:27:56.840 --> 00:27:58.760] Like our priorities have to be our priorities.
[00:27:58.760 --> 00:27:59.160] Right.
[00:27:59.960 --> 00:28:05.240] But I think it is about responding to when you see the resource that you know you need.
[00:28:05.240 --> 00:28:07.240] It's you're you've vetted it, right?
[00:28:07.240 --> 00:28:16.560] You've, you've, you've gotten good reviews or referrals from people that you trust, all the things that kind of like shore this up to be like, this is, this is a good place to be, or this is a good thing for me to invest in.
[00:28:17.040 --> 00:28:20.000] It's about listening to, is this, this is my priority.
[00:28:14.920 --> 00:28:21.440] I said this is my priority.
[00:28:21.760 --> 00:28:23.840] Why am I not acting like this is my priority?
[00:28:23.840 --> 00:28:26.640] And investing ahead, investing ahead.
[00:28:26.640 --> 00:28:36.080] That has and so I have in several seasons invested when I felt like I didn't air quote have it, meaning I put it on credit.
[00:28:36.080 --> 00:28:36.640] Yes.
[00:28:37.200 --> 00:28:37.920] Or at least a point.
[00:28:38.080 --> 00:28:40.640] I mean, you were just talking about credit last week.
[00:28:40.640 --> 00:28:45.920] So again, another honest conversation about how to smartly utilize credit.
[00:28:45.920 --> 00:28:46.320] Yes.
[00:28:46.320 --> 00:28:46.720] Yes.
[00:28:46.720 --> 00:28:54.960] I think, I mean, it's one thing to like leverage your credit for actually investing in yourself versus like, you know, things that maybe are completely depreciating or worthless as soon as you buy them.
[00:28:55.120 --> 00:28:56.400] You know, I got to be careful.
[00:28:56.800 --> 00:28:57.440] Be careful.
[00:28:57.520 --> 00:28:58.400] Got to be careful.
[00:28:58.400 --> 00:29:04.640] But I was like, again, this is when I invest, I always know that I'm placing a bet on myself and I'm clear on the priorities that I have for this season.
[00:29:04.640 --> 00:29:08.000] Like, you know what hurts the most or you know what you're most excited about.
[00:29:08.000 --> 00:29:12.960] Like those are the clear priorities as the needle movers in your life or in your business.
[00:29:12.960 --> 00:29:19.360] And so, yeah, there have been times when I've invested ahead like that and it has, it has always paid off.
[00:29:19.360 --> 00:29:20.640] You know what it is for me though?
[00:29:20.640 --> 00:29:23.920] I think it just activates urgency in me in a way.
[00:29:24.080 --> 00:29:25.040] I'm going to say that too.
[00:29:25.040 --> 00:29:28.560] It activates not only urgency, but commitment.
[00:29:28.560 --> 00:29:30.560] Like, yes, I am locked in.
[00:29:30.560 --> 00:29:31.280] I'm locked in.
[00:29:31.280 --> 00:29:32.560] I am locked in.
[00:29:32.560 --> 00:29:39.200] But I also have to add some caveats too, because if anyone's unclear, again, go back to the just-in-time.
[00:29:39.200 --> 00:29:43.440] Go back to like what is most important in your business right now.
[00:29:43.760 --> 00:29:52.000] So if you're feeling like, if it's still feeling like, oh, I don't know if this is worth it, perhaps it's because it's not a priority, right?
[00:29:52.240 --> 00:30:00.760] So if you're still feeling on the fence about things, I think that's, it's good to listen to that survival instinct in you as well, that gut check.
[00:30:00.760 --> 00:30:06.840] And, you know, remember, we're not saying to just because something's high ticket doesn't mean it's going to be valuable and good vets.
[00:29:59.920 --> 00:30:07.400] Business.
[00:30:07.960 --> 00:30:08.920] Vex.
[00:30:09.560 --> 00:30:14.760] And make sure it's what's really going to help you, really going to move the needle in your business.
[00:30:14.760 --> 00:30:17.560] Emphasis on your yes.
[00:30:17.800 --> 00:30:21.160] And I will also say, yeah, it's important to do that.
[00:30:21.400 --> 00:30:23.960] I mean, that's what we did when we went to school, right?
[00:30:23.960 --> 00:30:25.640] Unless you're on a school ride.
[00:30:26.040 --> 00:30:30.120] You invested ahead, you know, it's like this is not going to pay off for some years.
[00:30:30.120 --> 00:30:32.360] And it's a good chunk of money, you know?
[00:30:32.360 --> 00:30:33.320] But I know what this is.
[00:30:33.320 --> 00:30:36.440] I'm placing a bet on myself and what I'm going to do in this environment, in this space.
[00:30:36.440 --> 00:30:53.560] The other thing I just wanted to quickly say about investing in yourself in this way is that it's also, I think, really important to note that it's not just about there are lots of tools and strategies and things that can like create meaningful but still kind of incremental change in our businesses and in our work.
[00:30:54.040 --> 00:31:00.520] That sometimes I think we can get addicted to doing those things because they are like, they're acute, you know, solutions.
[00:31:00.520 --> 00:31:07.320] They create like quick wins and they do, you're moving forward, but it's like you're actually inching forward or getting like a yard or two.
[00:31:08.040 --> 00:31:15.480] When what might be beneath is what's keeping you from making the quantum leap, the big, you know, the actual shift.
[00:31:15.480 --> 00:31:17.800] Or it's like, actually, I'm not supposed to be on this football field.
[00:31:17.800 --> 00:31:19.400] Why am I even on this football field?
[00:31:19.400 --> 00:31:21.320] I'm supposed to be, I don't know, on a tennis court.
[00:31:21.320 --> 00:31:22.440] I'm just making stuff up.
[00:31:22.440 --> 00:31:31.400] But you'll never get to that if it's like, there's actually some internal stuff that's that is keeping me doing these little incremental things right now.
[00:31:31.480 --> 00:31:32.920] Is there a pattern here?
[00:31:32.920 --> 00:31:33.400] Yeah.
[00:31:33.800 --> 00:31:37.720] So it's hard to always see that, but just to bring some awareness to it.
[00:31:37.720 --> 00:31:38.440] Yeah.
[00:31:43.560 --> 00:31:48.080] And that's where coaching is also helpful because of being able, someone else is hearing you speak.
[00:31:48.320 --> 00:31:56.480] And so someone else can call you out on your thought process, whereas you're not going to really truly see your thought process because of your blind spot.
[00:31:56.480 --> 00:31:59.760] And that literally happened to me recently as well.
[00:32:00.240 --> 00:32:06.000] Because I was talking about the current challenges I'm facing in this season of my business.
[00:32:06.000 --> 00:32:17.760] And, you know, the person stopped me and said, you know, what you're saying is this and this, but what I'm actually hearing is you talk about unboxing and boxes.
[00:32:17.760 --> 00:32:27.280] And what I'm really hearing is there needs to be a dismantling of long-held beliefs in this next season.
[00:32:27.280 --> 00:32:42.320] And that's absolutely a space I'm in right now where I'm in this transitional phase where there are profound mindset shifts that need to happen in order for me to move past some of these barriers.
[00:32:42.320 --> 00:32:42.880] Yeah.
[00:32:43.200 --> 00:32:43.840] Yeah.
[00:32:43.840 --> 00:32:45.840] And those, that's, that's where the real work is.
[00:32:45.840 --> 00:32:47.920] And that's where you will get, you will get everything.
[00:32:48.000 --> 00:32:51.280] And you can't, you're not going to find that in a lesson per se.
[00:32:51.280 --> 00:32:56.240] In a, you know, you're not going to read my way through.
[00:32:56.240 --> 00:32:56.720] Yeah.
[00:32:56.880 --> 00:32:57.360] Exactly.
[00:32:57.360 --> 00:32:59.040] You're not going to podcast your way through it.
[00:32:59.040 --> 00:33:00.560] You're not going to read your way through it.
[00:33:00.720 --> 00:33:04.880] You might get some inspiration, some quick, you know, but you want to experience transformation.
[00:33:05.760 --> 00:33:06.240] Exactly.
[00:33:06.240 --> 00:33:07.200] Exactly.
[00:33:07.200 --> 00:33:07.680] Yeah.
[00:33:07.680 --> 00:33:09.760] This is why we need to work together, Monique.
[00:33:09.760 --> 00:33:10.320] But no.
[00:33:13.280 --> 00:33:18.000] Well, back to your steps to go out on your own.
[00:33:18.000 --> 00:33:21.120] So, you started the training, you started getting clients.
[00:33:21.120 --> 00:33:24.720] You were, you know, slowly raising your rates.
[00:33:24.680 --> 00:33:32.280] Um, at what point did you start to kind of systematize and regulate your business, so to speak?
[00:33:29.360 --> 00:33:36.920] Like, you knew how you're getting money and you could predict income and all those things?
[00:33:37.240 --> 00:33:39.080] Yeah, okay, so that's a multi-layered story.
[00:33:39.080 --> 00:33:44.120] But what I can say is, in that first year, I think I thought I had kind of gotten a little rhythm down, right?
[00:33:44.120 --> 00:33:49.400] My husband used to tease me because I had kind of like an in-person, events-based, network-based model.
[00:33:49.400 --> 00:33:54.440] I was like, if I go to certain spaces, I will, you know, pick up chicks, air quote.
[00:33:55.080 --> 00:33:57.240] He's like, you always get numbers from these women.
[00:33:57.240 --> 00:34:00.440] I'm like, you know, I'll be out here bagging the ladies, you know.
[00:34:00.440 --> 00:34:05.320] But I would just go and I would see who in the room is like sparking my interest.
[00:34:05.320 --> 00:34:08.040] I don't, I didn't necessarily go and research and like who's going to be there.
[00:34:08.040 --> 00:34:10.360] Like, I just, I was like, I don't need to do that at this stage of business.
[00:34:10.360 --> 00:34:12.040] I don't, I still don't really do that.
[00:34:12.040 --> 00:34:19.560] Um, and I would, I would pick up women and some of them would become friends, and some people would become referrals, some people become clients.
[00:34:19.560 --> 00:34:23.160] Um, but I was just like, I just need to keep meeting women, put myself out there.
[00:34:23.160 --> 00:34:25.720] And then I would do some different events and retreats and things like that as well.
[00:34:25.720 --> 00:34:28.280] So people could actually experience my coaching and facilitation.
[00:34:28.440 --> 00:34:33.080] Um, so I was like, okay, as long as I keep showing up in these spaces in person, that was like my like rhythm.
[00:34:33.160 --> 00:34:37.480] I was like, I'm good because I know that like I can experience a certain kind of conversion rate out of that over time.
[00:34:37.480 --> 00:34:38.120] Yeah.
[00:34:38.440 --> 00:34:43.320] Then 2020 and we were not in personing anywhere.
[00:34:43.320 --> 00:34:47.640] And so I had to about face, and that is one of those moments when I invested ahead, right?
[00:34:47.640 --> 00:34:52.120] When I was just like, okay, I absolutely have to figure out how to show up online.
[00:34:52.120 --> 00:34:59.720] And that's when I hired my amazing business coach, Teresha Hawk, who really helped me figure out that online model.
[00:34:59.720 --> 00:35:00.920] So I kind of restarted.
[00:35:00.920 --> 00:35:03.280] And I think that's just the experience of entrepreneurship, Brian.
[00:35:03.320 --> 00:35:08.280] It's like you feel like you get into a groove in a way, and then everything changes and you start all over again.
[00:35:08.280 --> 00:35:09.320] Everything changes.
[00:35:09.400 --> 00:35:10.440] You never have it figured out.
[00:35:10.600 --> 00:35:11.240] Oh my gosh.
[00:35:11.480 --> 00:35:13.160] First of all, Teresha is amazing.
[00:35:13.400 --> 00:35:13.720] Yeah.
[00:35:13.720 --> 00:35:15.280] She's been on the show way back.
[00:35:14.760 --> 00:35:16.640] I need to have her back in the chair.
[00:35:16.640 --> 00:35:18.800] But yeah, Darisha is amazing.
[00:35:14.840 --> 00:35:22.000] So kudos to you for choosing the right coach.
[00:35:22.480 --> 00:35:24.880] And then also, you're absolutely right.
[00:35:24.880 --> 00:35:32.240] I think that's part of my fundamental shift that's happening right now is no matter how many times it happens, you know, it's going to happen.
[00:35:32.240 --> 00:35:36.800] I think I was caught off guard by the current need for a lot to change.
[00:35:36.800 --> 00:35:38.800] I'm like, no, I don't want to start over.
[00:35:38.800 --> 00:35:40.800] Girl, I can't.
[00:35:40.800 --> 00:35:42.720] I literally have a lot going on right now.
[00:35:43.520 --> 00:35:44.800] Now is not the time.
[00:35:44.800 --> 00:35:47.600] Now it's not the time to start over.
[00:35:48.560 --> 00:35:50.000] Like, I got kids, a husband.
[00:35:50.000 --> 00:35:50.400] Like, what?
[00:35:51.600 --> 00:35:54.240] Girl, I have to figure out my business again.
[00:35:54.560 --> 00:36:00.800] But that's what happens, you know, like every several years, the market, everything's going to shift.
[00:36:01.200 --> 00:36:07.920] So I definitely was, I got a little too complacent and just forgot that this is just part of life in business.
[00:36:07.920 --> 00:36:08.320] Yeah.
[00:36:08.320 --> 00:36:14.240] And it's nice when a thing is working for a while, where it's just this is like locked in.
[00:36:14.240 --> 00:36:15.040] We know what we're doing.
[00:36:15.040 --> 00:36:17.200] We've got the systems that support the things.
[00:36:17.200 --> 00:36:17.520] Yeah.
[00:36:17.520 --> 00:36:19.440] But it's, you know, it's never forever.
[00:36:19.440 --> 00:36:20.800] It's never forever.
[00:36:20.800 --> 00:36:27.440] So yeah, I think I have had several seasons of that, or multiple seasons of that, where it was like I had a system that was locked in.
[00:36:27.440 --> 00:36:30.080] I kind of got the revenue moving in a certain way.
[00:36:30.080 --> 00:36:31.840] I knew what levers to pull.
[00:36:31.840 --> 00:36:33.120] And then I have to switch it up.
[00:36:33.120 --> 00:36:34.960] Then you have to switch it up.
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[00:39:28.880 --> 00:39:35.120] And you're unique in that you have done B2C, you know, business to customer, and also B2B, business to business.
[00:39:35.120 --> 00:39:38.240] You've been in-house with, again, you know, amazing firms.
[00:39:38.240 --> 00:39:49.920] Is this something you've done more recently after coaching from Jarisha, or did you start out like that with like, you know, I'm an in-house executive coach for this awesome Stanford business school and this other company?
[00:39:49.920 --> 00:39:50.400] Yeah.
[00:39:50.720 --> 00:39:53.040] So that was also a part of my bridgeway out.
[00:39:53.040 --> 00:39:59.680] So in that year, when I was transitioning out of my full-time role, I also, I was, you know, I was part-time at Stanford.
[00:39:59.680 --> 00:40:03.760] I would, so I, and I had my baby, so it was, it was a lot going on.
[00:40:04.080 --> 00:40:07.440] So I would work my days and then I would spend a little bit of time baby.
[00:40:07.440 --> 00:40:08.880] And then there was a multiple, multiple times a week.
[00:40:08.880 --> 00:40:16.000] I'd be driving down to Stanford to do work there at the business schools, facilitating and coaching in women's leadership circles, basically.
[00:40:16.320 --> 00:40:20.320] And then I would drive back, and then I would have like homework for my coaching certification.
[00:40:20.320 --> 00:40:21.920] So, I was figuring those things out.
[00:40:21.920 --> 00:40:27.040] So, that was just kind of a part of me, like building the network, building skills, building really confidence.
[00:40:27.040 --> 00:40:31.000] But, yet, my, I guess, portfolio-ish approach to building my business.
[00:40:29.680 --> 00:40:34.600] I've always known that I wanted to have some portion of my business.
[00:40:34.840 --> 00:40:39.960] I don't want to have all my eggs in one basket, some portion of my business that was B to B versus B to C.
[00:40:39.960 --> 00:40:42.600] Um, I prefer to have it's like an 80/20.
[00:40:42.680 --> 00:40:48.120] I prefer to have 80% of my business be B to C over B to B.
[00:40:48.120 --> 00:40:52.200] And when I say 10%, I think of it energy-wise because of my energy.
[00:40:52.200 --> 00:40:54.280] The energy, yes, yes.
[00:40:54.280 --> 00:41:00.280] Um, working with big companies, it takes a different it pulls on different energy levers for me, you know.
[00:41:00.520 --> 00:41:11.880] Um, you know, there's like just like the process of all things, just getting set up in the procurement, child, the approvals, and the things, you know, at my W-9 like four different times this week alone with a big company.
[00:41:11.880 --> 00:41:13.720] I'm like, what is going on?
[00:41:14.120 --> 00:41:14.760] Why?
[00:41:14.760 --> 00:41:17.080] Why don't your system process this?
[00:41:17.080 --> 00:41:18.280] So, I get it.
[00:41:18.280 --> 00:41:21.640] Yes, and it's those little things I just have less control over.
[00:41:21.640 --> 00:41:24.200] And freedom is a huge, huge value of mine.
[00:41:24.200 --> 00:41:26.120] So, that feels like it infringes on that.
[00:41:26.120 --> 00:41:27.720] I'm like, that's why I started my business.
[00:41:27.720 --> 00:41:28.840] I need to feel free.
[00:41:28.840 --> 00:41:41.080] So, so yeah, I'm doing because you're preaching to some of the beliefs that I need to work through, right?
[00:41:41.080 --> 00:41:47.240] Because I think what's been a struggle for me is right, I became an entrepreneur to, and y'all, I can't help it.
[00:41:47.240 --> 00:41:51.480] When I went, Monique, I can't help but you know, I just feel to get coaching.
[00:41:51.560 --> 00:41:53.960] Get into it, come on, get into it.
[00:41:53.960 --> 00:41:56.520] I love it, she's just so wise.
[00:41:56.520 --> 00:42:03.240] But so, no, but you just reminded me of what is one of my mental blocks right now, right?
[00:42:03.240 --> 00:42:07.640] I became an entrepreneur for control of my time and flexibility.
[00:42:07.640 --> 00:42:19.680] So, my fear, I guess, in doing B2B, which for a long time, you know, people have suggested business mentors have suggested, I was afraid of losing my time again.
[00:42:19.680 --> 00:42:22.560] It's almost like PTSD from working in corporate.
[00:42:22.560 --> 00:42:27.920] Like, oh my gosh, now are they going to want me to come in the office more, like to facilitate stuff?
[00:42:27.920 --> 00:42:30.000] Like, how is this going to work?
[00:42:30.000 --> 00:42:30.640] Right.
[00:42:30.960 --> 00:42:34.000] So that's something I need to work through.
[00:42:34.320 --> 00:42:34.800] Yeah.
[00:42:34.800 --> 00:42:39.360] So the decision to whether or not to give more of your time to the B2B work?
[00:42:39.760 --> 00:42:46.320] I guess, number one, stop imagining things that before it's an actual obstacle.
[00:42:46.320 --> 00:42:48.240] Like this is something I'm making up in my mind, right?
[00:42:48.240 --> 00:42:52.000] I don't even know what company it would be if they would need me in-house.
[00:42:52.160 --> 00:42:54.080] Maybe if it would just be once a month, right?
[00:42:54.080 --> 00:43:12.560] Like, so one, I'm creating a problem, and two, just opening myself to the possibilities, as you said, to kind of just unblock this area of my brain that's making me fear B2B because I know there's opportunity there and there's need there for my skill set.
[00:43:12.560 --> 00:43:16.800] So yeah, I had a conversation with a client that feels like connects.
[00:43:16.800 --> 00:43:18.160] Can I go into this really quickly with you?
[00:43:18.160 --> 00:43:18.640] Oh, yeah.
[00:43:18.640 --> 00:43:19.200] Oh, yeah.
[00:43:19.200 --> 00:43:23.040] And I hope I'm not hijacking y'all, but I just, it just triggered well.
[00:43:23.040 --> 00:43:30.240] This is also, I am positive that somebody listening right now, that probably a lot of y'all listening right now are going to connect to this experience too, because this is what happens.
[00:43:30.480 --> 00:43:57.520] I think, especially when you come from a marginalized community, I work mostly with women of color, but that PTSD experience, like pain drives a lot of our decisions or fear of experiencing pain because we know what it feels like to be, you know, to have control, you know, messed with, we'll say, I don't have to say taken away, but, you know, messed with, and what that, you know, what that does for our health, our psyche, and that sort of a thing.
[00:43:57.520 --> 00:44:12.440] And so when we enter into moments where it's like, okay, I've got a decision to make here to step into a new way or a new thing that I want to do, the first thing that can come up is like all the things that I might lose, all the scary things that might happen to me.
[00:44:12.440 --> 00:44:15.800] And it becomes really, really irrational, which I'm sure you're aware of, right?
[00:44:17.400 --> 00:44:21.560] But it's like you can be, you can be logically aware, but emotionally still stuck, you know?
[00:44:22.040 --> 00:44:24.280] That's just how our brains and our bodies work.
[00:44:24.280 --> 00:44:25.160] That's just what it is.
[00:44:25.160 --> 00:44:35.480] And so it's like, okay, how can I begin to like provide myself with some fodder to release some of the irrational attachment to like something bad is going to happen to me?
[00:44:35.880 --> 00:44:39.720] And then really the language happened to me is really, really, really important.
[00:44:39.720 --> 00:44:41.960] So for instance, I was talking to a client.
[00:44:42.280 --> 00:44:49.720] She's very, very accomplished, very, very senior, and she is looking for her multi-eight figure opportunity.
[00:44:50.200 --> 00:44:53.400] She's being courted and she's terrified.
[00:44:54.360 --> 00:44:56.520] What she knows is kind of like, what is going on?
[00:44:56.520 --> 00:45:00.520] Like, this is, it's not like I'm scared, I can't have it because I'm looking for it and nothing.
[00:45:00.760 --> 00:45:05.000] It's like people are approaching her saying, hey, you want this bag of money?
[00:45:05.000 --> 00:45:11.320] And she's like, but the first thoughts that come to mind are things like, you know, but what if I lose it all?
[00:45:11.320 --> 00:45:12.200] I've got kids.
[00:45:12.200 --> 00:45:14.280] You know, I got to put them through school.
[00:45:14.520 --> 00:45:16.440] You know, this and this happened with my family.
[00:45:16.440 --> 00:45:20.120] I've seen bad things, you know, like, and it's like none of these things are actually happening.
[00:45:20.120 --> 00:45:26.360] None of this, like you said, sort of you project out, you start like, you know, trying to, you know, predict the worst case scenario.
[00:45:26.920 --> 00:45:29.400] Yes, catastrophizing your butt off.
[00:45:29.400 --> 00:45:40.200] And what we came to, and I hope this is also helpful to you, Nikayla, as you're thinking about this too, is that you have standards and you have criteria that must be met.
[00:45:40.200 --> 00:45:45.440] All you have to do is identify what those standards and criteria are and assert them.
[00:45:44.760 --> 00:45:46.560] Say them out loud.
[00:45:46.880 --> 00:45:57.680] So, if it's like, for me, a multi-eight-figure, whatever opportunity needs to look like X, Y, and Z, or whatever the list of things are, then those are the only conversations you're having.
[00:45:57.680 --> 00:45:58.720] And you can say those things.
[00:45:58.720 --> 00:46:01.760] You're allowed to say those things in the conversations that you're having.
[00:46:01.760 --> 00:46:09.680] We believe that opportunities are so scarce or that these things will go away if we say what we want.
[00:46:10.000 --> 00:46:11.200] It can't be further from the truth.
[00:46:11.200 --> 00:46:12.640] It's actually very attractive.
[00:46:12.640 --> 00:46:16.000] And sometimes things will be repelled, but usually it's things that need to be repelled.
[00:46:16.000 --> 00:46:16.640] Right, right, right.
[00:46:17.200 --> 00:46:18.640] You didn't need that in the first place.
[00:46:18.640 --> 00:46:21.200] So, giving yourself a moment, no, it wasn't for you.
[00:46:21.200 --> 00:46:25.440] So, giving yourself a moment to identify: well, I have criteria, I have standards.
[00:46:25.440 --> 00:46:27.600] It's like, okay, these are what the hours need to look like.
[00:46:27.600 --> 00:46:29.200] These are what the commitments need to look like.
[00:46:29.600 --> 00:46:30.480] This is what I'm willing to do.
[00:46:30.480 --> 00:46:31.840] This is not what I'm willing to do.
[00:46:31.840 --> 00:46:38.400] And I know this from personal experience too, because I've had, you know, shaking in my boots, have conversations with these huge companies and tell them, no, I don't do this.
[00:46:38.400 --> 00:46:39.520] This is what it will look like.
[00:46:39.520 --> 00:46:40.480] This is what I need.
[00:46:40.480 --> 00:46:44.800] And you can find little opportunities for a compromise, but you keep it minimal.
[00:46:44.800 --> 00:46:45.360] Yes.
[00:46:45.760 --> 00:46:48.240] You're in control still over those things and you can walk away.
[00:46:49.520 --> 00:46:51.360] That was so powerful.
[00:46:51.360 --> 00:46:52.240] Yes.
[00:46:52.560 --> 00:46:54.480] I definitely needed to hear that.
[00:46:54.480 --> 00:46:56.000] And you know what that reminded me of?
[00:46:56.000 --> 00:47:07.440] Again, your background and having that early exposure to these executives, because I too have seen people who they were being courted for C-suite roles, and it was like the negotiations were at a standstill.
[00:47:07.440 --> 00:47:11.120] And it would be like, oh, they need their two personal assistants to come with them.
[00:47:11.120 --> 00:47:12.400] They need this, this, and that.
[00:47:12.400 --> 00:47:12.640] Girl.
[00:47:12.800 --> 00:47:14.320] They're like, okay, okay, okay.
[00:47:14.320 --> 00:47:16.480] They're just giving all the concessions.
[00:47:16.480 --> 00:47:17.120] Yes.
[00:47:17.120 --> 00:47:18.560] You know, I've seen it done.
[00:47:18.560 --> 00:47:20.160] You've seen it done too.
[00:47:20.160 --> 00:47:20.640] Yeah.
[00:47:20.640 --> 00:47:24.960] And at a certain level of expertise, it's like, Nikayla, this is a one-of-one podcast.
[00:47:24.960 --> 00:47:26.400] You're a one-of-one kind of girl.
[00:47:26.400 --> 00:47:29.760] You know, there is no other side hustle pro equivalent out there.
[00:47:30.040 --> 00:47:33.800] So, if somebody wants you and the value you bring, okay, where are you gonna go shop for it?
[00:47:33.800 --> 00:47:42.520] Go ahead, you know, it's like when you've been doing putting on a decade's worth of effort and expertise has been built up.
[00:47:42.760 --> 00:47:46.840] So, your value is so unique that you can rest in that.
[00:47:46.840 --> 00:47:49.320] You get to rest in the expertise you've built.
[00:47:49.320 --> 00:47:53.000] Thank you, thank you for that, and just thank you for being you again.
[00:47:53.000 --> 00:47:55.080] I hope y'all are soaking in this wisdom.
[00:47:55.080 --> 00:48:02.200] I hope that you, after this conversation, will definitely go over to MoniqueRShields.com and add yourself to that wait list.
[00:48:02.200 --> 00:48:07.560] All right, again, if you're not ready to invest ahead, add yourself to the email list, okay?
[00:48:07.560 --> 00:48:10.520] Because even the emails, bless me, Monique.
[00:48:10.520 --> 00:48:15.480] All right, come on, there's no chat GPT in there.
[00:48:15.480 --> 00:48:23.640] That is you, you can tell, English waiter.
[00:48:24.680 --> 00:48:30.760] Let's talk about your newest initiative, like your newest program that you're launching for moms or that you've launched.
[00:48:31.240 --> 00:48:34.840] Your ex-cohort is locked in for the next six months.
[00:48:34.840 --> 00:48:35.800] Um, tell us about it.
[00:48:35.800 --> 00:48:38.120] What's it called, and what is it?
[00:48:38.120 --> 00:48:47.800] Okay, so I came into this year, um, into full transparency post-election, feeling very, very clear that gathering women and prioritizing black women.
[00:48:47.800 --> 00:48:52.440] And I love my black mamas was of the utmost importance.
[00:48:52.440 --> 00:48:53.720] It's an imperative for me this year.
[00:48:53.720 --> 00:48:58.920] So, any ways that I can bring us together with intention, um, that's what I want to do this year.
[00:48:58.920 --> 00:49:29.840] And so, I created this group called Claimed, um, and it is for highly accomplished black mothers who are ready to open up their next chapter, but want to do it in a way where they're not compromising themselves, want to do it in a way where they can feel like we talk about release some of those PTSD attachments to old professional identities or old beliefs and that sort of a thing and move through and actually grab on to what's next, allow themselves to create what's going to come next that's even better than where they are now.
[00:49:30.160 --> 00:49:33.920] So yeah, it's a group about dreaming, it's a group about doing, it's a group about being.
[00:49:33.920 --> 00:49:36.720] And I'm really, really, really excited about the cohort that's come together.
[00:49:36.720 --> 00:49:45.600] Enrollment is closed for this cohort, but it's something that I think I'll, I think, I don't want to make any promises, y'all, but I want to do a special thing for black mothers every year.
[00:49:45.600 --> 00:49:46.960] I think I'm going to make this an annual thing.
[00:49:46.960 --> 00:49:47.280] We'll see.
[00:49:47.280 --> 00:49:49.040] So, you know, we'll take one year at a time.
[00:49:49.440 --> 00:49:51.600] But I'm really proud of it.
[00:49:51.600 --> 00:49:52.000] Yeah.
[00:49:52.000 --> 00:49:52.320] Yeah.
[00:49:52.320 --> 00:49:52.720] And we'll see.
[00:49:52.720 --> 00:49:59.440] I think I might do also a group that's not specific to mothers because I got a lot of questions like, what about kids?
[00:49:59.600 --> 00:50:03.120] I don't have to kid or you know, like, you can't do anything for it for identity.
[00:50:03.360 --> 00:50:11.360] And I'm like, I mean, let's talk about the people who, yeah, like, does this society even allow for people to become mothers, right?
[00:50:11.680 --> 00:50:18.640] You know, like, there's so many ambitious people who can they even take a pause to focus on that area.
[00:50:18.640 --> 00:50:23.680] So I know, I know your, your, your inbox was full of people like, what about me?
[00:50:25.200 --> 00:50:27.760] Yeah, it really is.
[00:50:27.760 --> 00:50:36.640] And yeah, whether you have wanted to become a mom or just have chosen not to or whatever the situation is, like, I think I'm for all of us, okay?
[00:50:36.640 --> 00:50:39.280] I am women of color broadly.
[00:50:39.280 --> 00:50:44.080] That's, that's, y'all are in my heart with um at the core of everything I create.
[00:50:44.080 --> 00:50:47.760] So, so yeah, that's that's what I'm about this year, and I'm really excited about it.
[00:50:48.560 --> 00:50:50.360] And you know, you're also an example.
[00:50:50.360 --> 00:51:01.800] Something that I also enjoy about you is you're an example of speaking of business evolving in creating new offerings and not being stuck in this box.
[00:51:01.800 --> 00:51:05.160] Don't put yourself in a box of, oh, this is what I offer.
[00:50:59.840 --> 00:51:06.920] And I can't create something new.
[00:51:07.080 --> 00:51:08.760] It will look weird or whatever.
[00:51:08.760 --> 00:51:15.800] Like, no, as you evolve and you see a new need, you have been one that has tested out different offerings.
[00:51:15.800 --> 00:51:19.640] So, how do you go about deciding what I'll offer when?
[00:51:19.640 --> 00:51:21.160] And as you think ahead, right?
[00:51:21.160 --> 00:51:22.840] Because I know you don't just plan in the moment.
[00:51:22.840 --> 00:51:24.760] You have to think ahead for your next year.
[00:51:25.080 --> 00:51:26.760] Yeah, I think about things for a while.
[00:51:26.760 --> 00:51:27.720] Sometimes too long, y'all.
[00:51:27.720 --> 00:51:28.280] I'm gonna be honest.
[00:51:28.920 --> 00:51:30.360] How are you getting your head about stuff?
[00:51:30.440 --> 00:51:32.440] But I really want things to feel right.
[00:51:32.920 --> 00:51:36.120] And so, yeah, my process looks like number one, listening.
[00:51:36.440 --> 00:51:48.520] Your market will tell you, and that's why it's so important to be visible and verbal, you know, vocal about what it is that you're doing because your audience, even if there are five people listening to you, they will tell you what they need.
[00:51:48.840 --> 00:51:51.560] And then all you got to do is show up and give them what they want or need.
[00:51:51.560 --> 00:51:52.360] That aligns for you.
[00:51:52.360 --> 00:51:54.360] You don't need to be doing stuff that you can't stand.
[00:51:54.360 --> 00:51:56.760] But, you know, so you find that intersection.
[00:51:56.760 --> 00:51:59.160] You just listen and they'll tell you what you need.
[00:51:59.160 --> 00:52:01.480] And then for me, I also just kind of like to test the waters.
[00:52:01.480 --> 00:52:03.400] I'm like, okay, I think I'm getting this signal.
[00:52:03.400 --> 00:52:04.440] I'm getting DMs.
[00:52:04.440 --> 00:52:06.520] People have asked me literally over the last two years.
[00:52:06.600 --> 00:52:07.800] I haven't done a group program.
[00:52:07.800 --> 00:52:09.560] I guess even three or so years.
[00:52:09.560 --> 00:52:11.000] I haven't done one in a while.
[00:52:11.000 --> 00:52:11.880] I've asked you.
[00:52:11.960 --> 00:52:13.480] Heaven asked me.
[00:52:13.480 --> 00:52:14.520] I was like, that was bigger.
[00:52:14.840 --> 00:52:16.040] I was one of them.
[00:52:16.040 --> 00:52:16.920] Help me.
[00:52:16.920 --> 00:52:18.600] It's like the Kevin Hart voice.
[00:52:18.600 --> 00:52:19.080] Help me.
[00:52:19.080 --> 00:52:20.040] Help me.
[00:52:23.160 --> 00:52:24.120] So I was with him.
[00:52:24.120 --> 00:52:25.560] Some help me, please.
[00:52:25.560 --> 00:52:26.760] Around this group thing.
[00:52:26.760 --> 00:52:28.120] And I was like, okay, let me see.
[00:52:28.120 --> 00:52:30.360] And then I just started feeling like I want it to be for moms.
[00:52:30.360 --> 00:52:32.280] I really want it to be for moms.
[00:52:32.840 --> 00:52:37.160] And so I, yeah, I remember I would put it like in like the PPS of my newsletter.
[00:52:37.240 --> 00:52:38.520] Like, I'm thinking about this thing.
[00:52:38.520 --> 00:52:38.760] Y'all.
[00:52:38.800 --> 00:52:39.400] Anybody interested?
[00:52:39.400 --> 00:52:40.680] And a bunch of people just raised their hand.
[00:52:40.760 --> 00:52:42.440] I was like, okay, there really is interest.
[00:52:42.440 --> 00:52:43.720] I'm not making this up.
[00:52:43.720 --> 00:52:47.360] So I kind of try to grow my data set to have confidence around the signal.
[00:52:47.360 --> 00:52:48.800] And then I just get to building.
[00:52:44.840 --> 00:52:51.600] And, you know, it's like anything else that you build when you build a new offer.
[00:52:51.760 --> 00:53:01.840] You can, I listen as I go, even as I'm interviewing and talking to people from their applications, understand

Prompt 2: Key Takeaways

Now please extract the key takeaways from the transcript content I provided.

Extract the most important key takeaways from this part of the conversation. Use a single sentence statement (the key takeaway) rather than milquetoast descriptions like "the hosts discuss...". 

Limit the key takeaways to a maximum of 3. The key takeaways should be insightful and knowledge-additive. 

IMPORTANT: Return ONLY valid JSON, no explanations or markdown. Ensure:
- All strings are properly quoted and escaped
- No trailing commas
- All braces and brackets are balanced
Format: {"key_takeaways": ["takeaway 1", "takeaway 2"]}

Prompt 3: Segments

Now identify 2-4 distinct topical segments from this part of the conversation.

For each segment, identify:
- Descriptive title (3-6 words)  
- START timestamp when this topic begins (HH:MM:SS format)
- Double check that the timestamp is accurate - a timestamp will NEVER be greater than the total length of the audio
- Most important Key takeaway from that segment. Key takeaway must be specific and knowledge-additive.
- Brief summary of the discussion

IMPORTANT: The timestamp should mark when the topic/segment STARTS, not a range. Look for topic transitions and conversation shifts.

Return ONLY valid JSON. Ensure all strings are properly quoted, no trailing commas:
{
  "segments": [
    {
      "segment_title": "Topic Discussion", 
      "timestamp": "01:15:30",
      "key_takeaway": "main point from this segment",
      "segment_summary": "brief description of what was discussed"
    }
  ]
}

Timestamp format: HH:MM:SS (e.g., 00:05:30, 01:22:45) marking the START of each segment.

Prompt 4: Media Mentions

Now scan the transcript content I provided for ACTUAL mentions of specific media titles:

Find explicit mentions of:
- Books (with specific titles)
- Movies (with specific titles)  
- TV Shows (with specific titles)
- Music/Songs (with specific titles)

DO NOT include:
- Websites, URLs, or web services
- Other podcasts or podcast names

IMPORTANT: 
- Only include items explicitly mentioned by name. Do not invent titles.
- Valid categories are: "Book", "Movie", "TV Show", "Music"
- Include the exact phrase where each item was mentioned
- Find the nearest proximate timestamp where it appears in the conversation
- THE TIMESTAMP OF THE MEDIA MENTION IS IMPORTANT - DO NOT INVENT TIMESTAMPS AND DO NOT MISATTRIBUTE TIMESTAMPS
- Double check that the timestamp is accurate - a timestamp will NEVER be greater than the total length of the audio
- Timestamps are given as ranges, e.g. 01:13:42.520 --> 01:13:46.720. Use the EARLIER of the 2 timestamps in the range.

Return ONLY valid JSON. Ensure all strings are properly quoted and escaped, no trailing commas:
{
  "media_mentions": [
    {
      "title": "Exact Title as Mentioned",
      "category": "Book",
      "author_artist": "N/A",
      "context": "Brief context of why it was mentioned",
      "context_phrase": "The exact sentence or phrase where it was mentioned",
      "timestamp": "estimated time like 01:15:30"
    }
  ]
}

If no media is mentioned, return: {"media_mentions": []}

Prompt 5: Context Setup

You are an expert data extractor tasked with analyzing a podcast transcript. 
I will provide you with part 2 of 2 from a podcast transcript. 
I will then ask you to extract different types of information from this content in subsequent messages. Please confirm you have received and understood the transcript content.

Transcript section:
2:04.440] I'm getting DMs.
[00:52:04.440 --> 00:52:06.520] People have asked me literally over the last two years.
[00:52:06.600 --> 00:52:07.800] I haven't done a group program.
[00:52:07.800 --> 00:52:09.560] I guess even three or so years.
[00:52:09.560 --> 00:52:11.000] I haven't done one in a while.
[00:52:11.000 --> 00:52:11.880] I've asked you.
[00:52:11.960 --> 00:52:13.480] Heaven asked me.
[00:52:13.480 --> 00:52:14.520] I was like, that was bigger.
[00:52:14.840 --> 00:52:16.040] I was one of them.
[00:52:16.040 --> 00:52:16.920] Help me.
[00:52:16.920 --> 00:52:18.600] It's like the Kevin Hart voice.
[00:52:18.600 --> 00:52:19.080] Help me.
[00:52:19.080 --> 00:52:20.040] Help me.
[00:52:23.160 --> 00:52:24.120] So I was with him.
[00:52:24.120 --> 00:52:25.560] Some help me, please.
[00:52:25.560 --> 00:52:26.760] Around this group thing.
[00:52:26.760 --> 00:52:28.120] And I was like, okay, let me see.
[00:52:28.120 --> 00:52:30.360] And then I just started feeling like I want it to be for moms.
[00:52:30.360 --> 00:52:32.280] I really want it to be for moms.
[00:52:32.840 --> 00:52:37.160] And so I, yeah, I remember I would put it like in like the PPS of my newsletter.
[00:52:37.240 --> 00:52:38.520] Like, I'm thinking about this thing.
[00:52:38.520 --> 00:52:38.760] Y'all.
[00:52:38.800 --> 00:52:39.400] Anybody interested?
[00:52:39.400 --> 00:52:40.680] And a bunch of people just raised their hand.
[00:52:40.760 --> 00:52:42.440] I was like, okay, there really is interest.
[00:52:42.440 --> 00:52:43.720] I'm not making this up.
[00:52:43.720 --> 00:52:47.360] So I kind of try to grow my data set to have confidence around the signal.
[00:52:47.360 --> 00:52:48.800] And then I just get to building.
[00:52:44.840 --> 00:52:51.600] And, you know, it's like anything else that you build when you build a new offer.
[00:52:51.760 --> 00:53:01.840] You can, I listen as I go, even as I'm interviewing and talking to people from their applications, understanding what it is that they really want, what it is that they're really struggling with.
[00:53:01.840 --> 00:53:09.360] And yeah, the things it's crazy sometimes I think about it's wild, but they build themselves if you just listen and respond.
[00:53:15.120 --> 00:53:18.080] Yes, yes, that is absolutely accurate.
[00:53:18.080 --> 00:53:24.080] And speaking of listening, you have a podcast, Ambition Without Compromise.
[00:53:24.400 --> 00:53:30.480] At what stage in the game did you start your podcast and why did you start it?
[00:53:30.800 --> 00:53:35.440] Okay, so I've had my business six and a half years.
[00:53:35.440 --> 00:53:38.320] I started my podcast two and a half years ago, I think.
[00:53:38.320 --> 00:53:40.240] So like 20, something like that.
[00:53:40.240 --> 00:53:40.720] Yes.
[00:53:40.720 --> 00:53:41.200] Yes.
[00:53:41.200 --> 00:53:45.520] Because I had my son at the end of 2022 and I started beginning to prep to have my podcast.
[00:53:45.520 --> 00:53:47.280] Yes, in spring of 2023.
[00:53:47.280 --> 00:53:50.880] So yeah, what prompted that was, well, really two things.
[00:53:50.880 --> 00:53:54.720] One was about I always kind of count my experience first.
[00:53:54.720 --> 00:53:58.080] So I mean, I'm the person who has to do this thing.
[00:53:58.080 --> 00:53:59.920] I need to feel a certain way doing it.
[00:54:00.320 --> 00:54:04.000] I won't do things that completely like I don't do anything that destabilizes my energy.
[00:54:04.000 --> 00:54:07.760] I don't do things because it that messes up the big play.
[00:54:07.760 --> 00:54:12.960] You know, we got to think about the big play, you know, especially at my grown age with these children.
[00:54:12.960 --> 00:54:15.440] Yes, I need to make sure I'm less energy.
[00:54:15.440 --> 00:54:18.480] Okay, I can't be doing other stuff to destabilize.
[00:54:18.800 --> 00:54:19.520] That's enough.
[00:54:19.520 --> 00:54:24.320] One thing that destabilizes energy one at a time.
[00:54:24.320 --> 00:54:26.000] And they're not going to quit.
[00:54:26.000 --> 00:54:29.520] So, so yes, I'm really, really cognizant of that.
[00:54:29.520 --> 00:54:31.000] And so, I tested for a while.
[00:54:29.760 --> 00:54:34.600] I used to have this thing called my letters from Monique, it was an audio newsletter.
[00:54:29.840 --> 00:54:35.400] And it was my way.
[00:54:35.560 --> 00:54:41.880] When I first started the business, I was like, okay, I want, I don't know this email marketing thing, but I was like, I kind of feel like I want to have a way where I'm in some people's inbox.
[00:54:41.880 --> 00:54:43.480] My list has been tiny around it.
[00:54:43.480 --> 00:54:46.360] You know, I just kind of like put something out there just to build the muscle.
[00:54:46.360 --> 00:54:53.800] But I was like, if I can prove to myself that I can do one audio a month for a year while I'm doing all these other things in my business or whatever, then we'll see if we go up from there.
[00:54:53.800 --> 00:54:55.160] So that was kind of my experiment.
[00:54:55.160 --> 00:54:56.040] I proved it to myself.
[00:54:56.040 --> 00:54:56.680] I liked it.
[00:54:56.680 --> 00:54:57.640] I felt good in it.
[00:54:57.640 --> 00:55:01.960] And then I did some customer interviews with some of my favorite clients and women in my network.
[00:55:01.960 --> 00:55:05.800] And one of the questions I asked was, Where do you consume?
[00:55:06.360 --> 00:55:09.160] What are you watching, listening to, reading?
[00:55:09.480 --> 00:55:11.480] And my girly is a podcast girly.
[00:55:11.560 --> 00:55:19.080] Most of my clients and women and you know, my ideal sort of targeted woman, she likes podcasts because she's a multitasker.
[00:55:19.080 --> 00:55:23.560] So she can listen to her podcast while she's walking or cleaning or driving.
[00:55:23.560 --> 00:55:24.680] So I was like, okay, it's clear.
[00:55:24.680 --> 00:55:25.960] I need to do this podcast thing.
[00:55:25.960 --> 00:55:27.400] I want to meet her where she is.
[00:55:27.400 --> 00:55:30.600] And I've actually given myself that time to see that I enjoyed it.
[00:55:30.600 --> 00:55:35.960] So I said a nice, ease, full frequency bi-weekly, every other Wednesday, and it's been wonderful.
[00:55:35.960 --> 00:55:36.760] Nice.
[00:55:36.760 --> 00:55:40.360] And speaking of gifts, that is also another one of your gifts.
[00:55:40.360 --> 00:55:43.960] I think you have one of the most peaceful, calming voices.
[00:55:43.960 --> 00:55:52.520] And for me, as you know, someone who falls into your target audience, it's like I'm listening to a girlfriend, a coach as I'm driving or what have you.
[00:55:52.520 --> 00:55:57.240] So it's like I'm having a conversation with someone I would want to talk to anyway.
[00:55:57.240 --> 00:56:11.240] And so, yeah, if you, if you have a podcast audio, like if the people who you want to target are listeners, our watchers, which honestly, I think most people are these days, then it's something, it's something to consider for sure.
[00:56:11.560 --> 00:56:17.520] But it was really interesting when we worked together because you said something that was very unique.
[00:56:14.840 --> 00:56:21.200] You're like, listen, my focus is not on growing the show.
[00:56:21.520 --> 00:56:33.840] My focus is on deepening the message, clarifying the message, and really getting clear on what this person needs to hear and the topics and the how.
[00:56:33.840 --> 00:56:36.480] Like, tell me, tell us a little bit more about that.
[00:56:36.480 --> 00:56:47.600] Like, why was it more important to you about the content and not so much the growing the audience and becoming like this big podcast Instagram TikTok sensation?
[00:56:50.800 --> 00:56:52.400] Well, I think there's a few things there.
[00:56:52.400 --> 00:57:00.320] So, when I first started the podcast, my intention for that entire year, not even just the podcast, but for everything, it was again, I had just had my second baby.
[00:57:00.320 --> 00:57:02.400] And I was like, this year is about depth.
[00:57:02.400 --> 00:57:03.440] It's not about breadth.
[00:57:03.440 --> 00:57:04.240] It's about depth.
[00:57:04.240 --> 00:57:05.600] So, I want to do very few things.
[00:57:05.600 --> 00:57:07.280] I want to do them very well.
[00:57:07.520 --> 00:57:08.240] So, there was that.
[00:57:08.240 --> 00:57:10.560] So, that's just the energy with which I started the podcast.
[00:57:10.560 --> 00:57:21.200] Then, by the time you and I start working together, my podcast coach, VIP coaching with Nikayla, first of all, if you're not on her wait list, she's got the keys to the kingdom, just to be clear.
[00:57:21.200 --> 00:57:25.840] So, which was so, so, so helpful getting your feedback because you're obviously a killer in the game.
[00:57:25.840 --> 00:57:32.960] So, yeah, but me just sort of discovering also at that time, I was like, oh, where my business is at right now, I'm not in a growth stage.
[00:57:32.960 --> 00:57:37.280] I'm like, I, I, for who I'm speaking to, which is like, I'm not for everyone.
[00:57:37.280 --> 00:57:42.320] I'm, you know, like you're women of a, uh, of certain at a certain stage in your career and life.
[00:57:42.320 --> 00:57:44.240] There are certain variables that have to come together.
[00:57:44.240 --> 00:57:47.360] That's not a, it's not a mass market message necessarily.
[00:57:47.360 --> 00:57:53.040] I think I could see it growing in the future, but I was like, before where I'm at right now, I want to like be super clear.
[00:57:53.040 --> 00:57:54.640] I'm calling in her.
[00:57:54.640 --> 00:57:56.640] Like, I want, I want my market to be tight.
[00:57:56.640 --> 00:58:05.160] I would love in the future to be able to position this to sponsor as just saying, I have this super tight niche group, and I know I've got them all.
[00:57:59.840 --> 00:58:05.960] They're all here.
[00:58:06.600 --> 00:58:10.040] You know, it's not huge, but it's tight and it's crisp.
[00:58:10.040 --> 00:58:12.680] And so, um, so I was just really clear on that.
[00:58:12.680 --> 00:58:15.880] And I also just the activities that are involved and really, really growing.
[00:58:16.040 --> 00:58:22.920] That was one of the beautiful things also about working with you was understanding somebody from somebody who has a huge podcast and a large following.
[00:58:22.920 --> 00:58:26.760] You know, what are all the different levers you pull, the different work streams?
[00:58:26.760 --> 00:58:34.440] And I was like, I think to do that well, to do it at a Nikayla level, I would have to have my business a lot more focused on the podcast, meaning my daily activities.
[00:58:34.440 --> 00:58:36.680] And it's like, I'm not ready to make that pivot.
[00:58:36.680 --> 00:58:42.200] So, so yeah, it was like a capacity, a season thing, like ideal client thing.
[00:58:42.200 --> 00:58:42.680] Yeah.
[00:58:42.680 --> 00:58:48.840] And I think you do such an excellent job of, like you said, owning that of, okay, here's what I want this to look like.
[00:58:48.840 --> 00:58:51.240] Here's how much energy I want this to occupy.
[00:58:51.240 --> 00:58:54.920] And here's how I want to do it well in this energy space.
[00:58:54.920 --> 00:58:59.880] Like I recognize what that would look like, but that's not what I want for me right now or maybe ever.
[00:59:00.040 --> 00:59:01.000] But this is what I want.
[00:59:01.000 --> 00:59:03.640] And here's how I want to do it well here.
[00:59:03.640 --> 00:59:04.360] Totally.
[00:59:04.680 --> 00:59:06.440] I try to respond to my seasons.
[00:59:06.440 --> 00:59:09.080] Like I really, really, really try to do that.
[00:59:09.400 --> 00:59:11.480] Not perfect at it, but it's really important to me.
[00:59:11.480 --> 00:59:11.880] And that's it.
[00:59:11.880 --> 00:59:12.200] It is.
[00:59:12.200 --> 00:59:14.440] I might change my mind like a couple of years from now or next year.
[00:59:14.440 --> 00:59:14.760] Who knows?
[00:59:14.760 --> 00:59:17.640] I might be like, Nikayla, how do I grow this thing to something massive?
[00:59:18.920 --> 00:59:36.680] No, I think we kind of have that similarity in it's almost like when you are in the space of having people apply to work with you, you truly are able to be selective and match energy and make sure energy is aligned when you get on calls.
[00:59:36.680 --> 00:59:42.440] And, you know, from the jump, I could just tell that one, like, I'm a fan of yours, right?
[00:59:42.440 --> 00:59:47.920] Like, I listen to your podcast in earnest and I get so much from it.
[00:59:47.920 --> 00:59:49.600] You see me share it in my own newsletter.
[00:59:49.600 --> 00:59:52.320] You're so great to you.
[00:59:52.640 --> 01:00:02.960] So, but again, I just think that is alignment and really understanding who we would who we would work with the best.
[01:00:02.960 --> 01:00:06.720] Did you ever have any experience where that was kind of hard for you at first starting out?
[01:00:06.720 --> 01:00:10.800] Like, understanding how to select clients?
[01:00:10.800 --> 01:00:11.840] I think, I think so.
[01:00:11.840 --> 01:00:15.920] I think that's like with anything, you know, where it's just like, I don't, I've always had wonderful clients.
[01:00:15.920 --> 01:00:19.200] I don't think I've ever had an experience where it's like, whoa, that was not good.
[01:00:19.520 --> 01:00:20.480] That was bad.
[01:00:20.880 --> 01:00:21.680] I don't add again.
[01:00:22.080 --> 01:00:22.400] Right.
[01:00:22.400 --> 01:00:35.120] I haven't, I haven't had quite that, but I definitely have where it's just like, oh, you're like adjacent, you know, like this is like a, you're like, but you learned, you only learn by doing, you only learned by experiencing different people.
[01:00:35.120 --> 01:00:41.920] And also who I served, you know, two years ago, two years prior to that, two, you know, like all of that continues to evolve.
[01:00:41.920 --> 01:00:48.560] So as my business evolves, as I evolve, as my skills and all of that evolves, so does my client.
[01:00:48.560 --> 01:00:52.080] And so I'm constantly relearning her as well.
[01:00:52.480 --> 01:00:55.200] And so I have to like continue, like even with claimed, right?
[01:00:55.200 --> 01:00:59.440] I had to like, okay, I have to get really tight on who she is.
[01:00:59.440 --> 01:01:02.240] And that's been also the benefit of working with coaches as well.
[01:01:02.640 --> 01:01:03.920] Sometimes it's hard to see it yourself.
[01:01:03.920 --> 01:01:05.200] You don't see the water swimming in.
[01:01:05.200 --> 01:01:06.800] You're like, girl, she's right there.
[01:01:06.800 --> 01:01:07.440] This is your girl.
[01:01:07.440 --> 01:01:08.320] This is what she's saying.
[01:01:09.280 --> 01:01:18.120] Even as a coach, like I'm very impressed by how you have a million, no, I will say a million, but you have you get some coaching, girl?
[01:01:18.440 --> 01:01:19.680] You're a health coach, a money coach.
[01:01:20.240 --> 01:01:20.640] Yes.
[01:01:20.640 --> 01:01:23.200] I didn't even know these kinds of coaches existed.
[01:01:23.200 --> 01:01:36.520] But no, that again has inspired me to step it up, you know, just in time or when the times are right, not trying to do everything at once because that would not be going along with your ethos of protecting our energy either.
[01:01:36.840 --> 01:01:44.200] But I'm really inspired by how you are very intentional about your coaching and also resourcing yourself.
[01:01:44.200 --> 01:01:46.520] Can you talk a little bit about that?
[01:01:46.520 --> 01:01:50.360] Yes, that is core to my message because we are moving around out here.
[01:01:50.360 --> 01:01:54.680] And so much of what ails us and what is keeping us stuck and what feels hard is the fact that we're alone.
[01:01:54.680 --> 01:02:00.120] My clients, one of the top, you asked me earlier, like, you know, sort of what it is that I see executive coaching being.
[01:02:00.120 --> 01:02:04.440] And I was kind of talking about it a little bit, but it's really like I'm a solution to isolation.
[01:02:04.440 --> 01:02:24.680] You know, when you are super high achieving and you're operating in spaces where, you know, professionally, like there's that element of having to be on and all that all the time, but also personally, if you are the one in your family who's like, I'm the rock, or I'm the one that made it out, or I'm the one who's got it together, or I'm the one that, you know, then you're all to worry about.
[01:02:24.680 --> 01:02:27.640] Yes, I'm the one that I'm your strong friend, you know.
[01:02:27.640 --> 01:02:32.920] So when you occupy that identity as well, it's like, where do you go to get to set that down?
[01:02:33.240 --> 01:02:39.320] You, it's like you might have people who love you and you know that, but it's like they don't, they, they're not fully, they can't fully relate.
[01:02:39.320 --> 01:02:50.040] They can't give me the full spectrum support that I really need, or I can't, I can't talk to them about my million dollar problems and stuff because it sounds ungrateful or it sounds, you know, awkward.
[01:02:50.040 --> 01:02:52.440] So, so yeah.
[01:02:52.440 --> 01:03:03.800] When it comes to resourcing yourself, you had a whole episode about that, how you are very intentional about the resources you need to for self-preservation, really.
[01:03:03.800 --> 01:03:09.000] Because if you are burnt out and stretched thin, nobody wins.
[01:03:09.000 --> 01:03:10.760] So, how did you approach that?
[01:03:10.760 --> 01:03:13.480] How do you approach that in your life?
[01:03:13.800 --> 01:03:18.320] So, how I approach resourcing myself in my life is I just don't hold back.
[01:03:18.960 --> 01:03:26.800] Every time I overinvest or invest ahead, again, you don't have to go wild with this, but there have been, there have been years where I'm like, I'm going wild.
[01:03:26.800 --> 01:03:39.680] I'm like, when I think about like the percentage of my profits or, you know, that have gone towards like pouring right back into me, the return on that investment, it is always worth it.
[01:03:39.680 --> 01:03:41.200] It is always worth it.
[01:03:41.200 --> 01:03:44.400] It always exceeds my expectations.
[01:03:44.400 --> 01:04:01.040] Because when we, when we feel supported, when we feel unalone, when we feel healthy, when we feel well, and we feel like there's a whole squad, a whole team around us that is helping to hold us in that way, then we're operating, I think, the way that humans were actually meant to operate, which is, you know, we talked about Texas Village.
[01:04:01.040 --> 01:04:06.800] It really does, but we're not set up in this system, in this society to experience what we should be.
[01:04:06.800 --> 01:04:13.520] So we have to unfortunately, deeply unfortunately, there's a paywall between us and our wholeness in this way.
[01:04:13.520 --> 01:04:22.080] But if we have the privilege of approaching that paywall and inserting, you know, our credit card here, our cash here, do it.
[01:04:22.080 --> 01:04:26.320] I do it every single time because the payout for me is exponential.
[01:04:26.320 --> 01:04:33.200] I've never, I have never invested, even the things that were like, the content that I got from it was just like, okay, or whatever.
[01:04:33.440 --> 01:04:40.640] But there's usually at least one strong nugget that changed something real because that's what I'm going to make of every investment that I take for myself, every opportunity.
[01:04:40.640 --> 01:04:45.440] So everything makes me, it forwards me, it expands me, it makes me more money.
[01:04:45.760 --> 01:04:49.280] I've never experienced an investment in myself that didn't pay out ever.
[01:04:49.600 --> 01:05:10.280] And you had a recent episode about this because what I find myself in a boat of, and some of you listening may also feel this way, is when you've done all the things and you've checked all the boxes and you're trying your hardest to do everything you can, right, for resourcing yourself and you still feel burnt out.
[01:05:10.280 --> 01:05:12.920] Like, is this like a series you're going to do?
[01:05:12.920 --> 01:05:16.360] I know that that episode addressed it, but I'm like, are you going to work?
[01:05:16.360 --> 01:05:20.360] Are you going to help us work through this season on your show?
[01:05:21.320 --> 01:05:23.000] How do we get past it?
[01:05:23.000 --> 01:05:23.400] Yeah.
[01:05:23.640 --> 01:05:28.040] Well, that's when you're doing so many things and you think you're resourcing yourself.
[01:05:28.920 --> 01:05:29.400] Yeah.
[01:05:29.720 --> 01:05:33.160] So this gets back to some of the things that we were talking about earlier.
[01:05:33.160 --> 01:05:41.240] I think the episode that you're referencing is when I was kind of making a comparison to that, or I was referencing that book, 10X is Easier Than 2X.
[01:05:41.240 --> 01:05:41.560] Yes.
[01:05:41.560 --> 01:05:42.040] Yes.
[01:05:42.040 --> 01:05:42.760] Yes.
[01:05:42.760 --> 01:05:43.320] Okay.
[01:05:43.320 --> 01:05:56.040] So I don't know if you're listeners, watchers are familiar with the book, 10X is Easier Than 2X, but very high level, the premise of that book is that in order to make 2X changes, which is what we typically shoot for, it's like, I'm going to double my revenue.
[01:05:56.040 --> 01:05:57.640] I'm going to double my list.
[01:05:57.640 --> 01:05:59.320] I'm going to double whatever it might be.
[01:05:59.320 --> 01:06:00.200] That's big, right?
[01:06:00.200 --> 01:06:01.240] It's really hard.
[01:06:01.560 --> 01:06:05.080] But what that means is you're just going to double your effort to get double the outcome.
[01:06:05.080 --> 01:06:09.160] 10X means I fundamentally shift what my business does.
[01:06:09.320 --> 01:06:14.520] Oftentimes it means a lot of carving away of things of like, what do I need to release a whole new identity?
[01:06:14.520 --> 01:06:21.560] Like if you think about the DNA of a business has to actually change if it says we're actually going to go from where we are today to 10X.
[01:06:21.560 --> 01:06:22.040] Yes.
[01:06:22.040 --> 01:06:23.800] You have to, you have to become different.
[01:06:23.800 --> 01:06:25.800] You can't just double your effort to get 10X.
[01:06:26.040 --> 01:06:27.080] That was an episode.
[01:06:27.080 --> 01:06:27.640] Yeah.
[01:06:27.640 --> 01:06:28.120] Yes.
[01:06:28.120 --> 01:06:29.160] So that's the same thing.
[01:06:29.240 --> 01:06:30.680] That's the identity piece.
[01:06:30.680 --> 01:06:31.480] Yes.
[01:06:31.480 --> 01:06:32.040] It is that.
[01:06:32.200 --> 01:06:34.200] If you're not working at that level, that's it.
[01:06:34.200 --> 01:06:40.520] If you're not working at that identity level, you're never going to get that 10X because that is what's fundamental to us.
[01:06:40.520 --> 01:06:44.040] It's like it shapes the way that we see the problems or the opportunities in front of us.
[01:06:44.040 --> 01:06:47.440] It shapes the way that we view ourselves, our self-concept I talk a lot about.
[01:06:47.840 --> 01:06:57.760] So if you're not doing that work around your self-concept, around how you perceive the world, you're not going to get that 10X payout.
[01:06:57.760 --> 01:07:00.000] So at some point, you're just fully optimized, baby.
[01:07:00.080 --> 01:07:10.080] Like, I just want everybody to know, you know, you've got, if you have, like, I've got meal delivery or housekeepers and nannies and laundry service, lady, like, then that's it.
[01:07:10.080 --> 01:07:10.960] You tapped out.
[01:07:10.960 --> 01:07:12.080] There's nothing wrong with you.
[01:07:12.080 --> 01:07:16.400] It's just you've reached, you've reached the pinnacle, you know, like you can't go any higher.
[01:07:16.400 --> 01:07:17.280] And that that's okay.
[01:07:17.280 --> 01:07:20.720] So now it's about, okay, there are some things that I'm holding on to.
[01:07:20.720 --> 01:07:26.480] There's a, there are ways that I am being that I've got to get into.
[01:07:26.480 --> 01:07:29.040] I've got to get into in a really, in a really, real way.
[01:07:29.040 --> 01:07:38.640] I also just want to name one quick caveat, though, that's really important: is that I will never separate this from the capitalist system that demands us to always be on and to be exhausted all the time.
[01:07:38.800 --> 01:07:43.040] There's a huge, huge driving factor as to why you still feel exhausted, babes, as well.
[01:07:43.520 --> 01:07:44.160] Exactly.
[01:07:44.160 --> 01:07:54.640] Because when a system makes lets kids get out of school at 3:30 and then the workday, it's a different, like it, it was never meant for us to make it make sense.
[01:07:54.640 --> 01:07:55.040] Okay.
[01:07:55.360 --> 01:08:07.200] But that identity piece, from what I understand of it right now, at the level I'm at, you know, it's like, first of all, you cannot see the identity you've chosen to occupy because it's another blind spot.
[01:08:07.200 --> 01:08:11.600] So, but if you fundamentally think, you know, I'm a solopreneur, I do this.
[01:08:11.600 --> 01:08:12.400] It's okay.
[01:08:12.400 --> 01:08:13.040] I can do this.
[01:08:13.280 --> 01:08:15.280] I can do a little bit of this, a little bit of that.
[01:08:15.280 --> 01:08:18.000] It's like, no, you cannot.
[01:08:18.320 --> 01:08:25.040] You have to fundamentally shift and start to operate differently.
[01:08:25.040 --> 01:08:33.560] And what that looks like could be many different things, but I'm just sharing with you guys, like, what I took away from that and what might be helpful for all of you as well.
[01:08:33.720 --> 01:08:41.880] Like, a lot of us actually need to start to dismantle some of the identities we've taken on unknowingly.
[01:08:41.880 --> 01:08:42.440] Yes.
[01:08:42.440 --> 01:08:42.840] Yes.
[01:08:42.840 --> 01:08:47.720] That's when you know you get into stuff like, what is my relationship to help?
[01:08:48.040 --> 01:08:50.120] What is my relationship to risk?
[01:08:50.120 --> 01:08:51.800] What is my relationship to?
[01:08:51.800 --> 01:08:53.720] And those aren't optimizing things.
[01:08:53.720 --> 01:08:54.840] Those are identity things.
[01:08:54.840 --> 01:08:55.400] It's old.
[01:08:55.560 --> 01:08:57.400] And stories we tell ourselves.
[01:08:57.400 --> 01:09:01.640] Every time one of my friends talks to me, she's like, you know, I'm not a risk taker.
[01:09:01.640 --> 01:09:07.720] And I want to be like, that's a story from the rooftops.
[01:09:08.040 --> 01:09:10.440] Because, like, honestly, I don't identify as that either.
[01:09:10.440 --> 01:09:12.360] I don't identify as a risk taker.
[01:09:12.360 --> 01:09:16.840] I'm just living the best life that I have carved out is right for me.
[01:09:18.040 --> 01:09:18.360] Yeah.
[01:09:18.360 --> 01:09:22.920] We're walking around with a lot of invisible I ams, and it's about doing the work.
[01:09:22.920 --> 01:09:24.120] And I'm not.
[01:09:24.120 --> 01:09:25.080] And I'm not.
[01:09:25.080 --> 01:09:25.960] Yes, exactly.
[01:09:25.960 --> 01:09:29.480] And it's about doing the work to make those things a lot more visible to you so that you can hold.
[01:09:29.880 --> 01:09:31.480] Oh, that one's holding me back.
[01:09:31.480 --> 01:09:34.680] Or that one's, you know, like, you mean that's not true?
[01:09:34.680 --> 01:09:35.720] Oh, that's not.
[01:09:35.720 --> 01:09:39.320] Oh, and the last thing I'll say, because I know I could talk to Monique forever, y'all.
[01:09:40.840 --> 01:09:44.360] But it's that, yeah, that piece around the help too, right?
[01:09:44.360 --> 01:09:49.960] Like thinking for, because I know I'm doing this work as well, releasing.
[01:09:49.960 --> 01:09:58.120] I, for a long time, felt bad about getting laundry service because I thought my neighbors would look at me like, is she for real?
[01:09:58.120 --> 01:10:01.280] I mean, she got a wash and dryer.
[01:10:00.120 --> 01:10:05.720] Like, I know she can't do her own laundry.
[01:10:06.680 --> 01:10:18.400] Like the stories, allowing yourself, giving yourself permission to do and get help is another identity shift as well.
[01:10:14.840 --> 01:10:21.520] So, Monique, God bless you and the work you are doing.
[01:10:21.840 --> 01:10:24.960] We are going to transition into a quick lightning round.
[01:10:24.960 --> 01:10:26.160] Are you ready?
[01:10:26.160 --> 01:10:27.120] Okay.
[01:10:31.520 --> 01:10:32.800] All right, number one.
[01:10:32.800 --> 01:10:37.680] What is a resource that is really helping you in your business these days that you can share with us?
[01:10:37.680 --> 01:10:41.760] I mean, I guess my assistant, I'm like, I don't know what else to say, honestly.
[01:10:41.760 --> 01:10:42.400] My assistant.
[01:10:42.480 --> 01:10:43.440] How did you find your assistant?
[01:10:43.440 --> 01:10:44.640] How'd you find your assistant?
[01:10:44.640 --> 01:10:54.800] Y'all, my dirty little secret is that my husband found my assistant because he was working on something and found, I don't know what online marketplace or whatever labor spot.
[01:10:56.240 --> 01:10:58.080] And he was just raving about her.
[01:10:58.080 --> 01:10:59.760] I was like, oh, let me holler at her real quick.
[01:11:00.640 --> 01:11:01.920] Snatched her right on up.
[01:11:01.920 --> 01:11:02.720] I did.
[01:11:02.720 --> 01:11:04.480] That's a partnership.
[01:11:07.200 --> 01:11:12.080] Who is a black woman entrepreneur who you'd want to switch places with for a day?
[01:11:12.080 --> 01:11:12.800] And why?
[01:11:12.800 --> 01:11:14.960] Non-celebrity, if possible?
[01:11:14.960 --> 01:11:16.800] Someone I'm really curious about.
[01:11:16.800 --> 01:11:17.920] Oh my gosh, the editor.
[01:11:18.160 --> 01:11:19.840] Well, she's not an entrepreneur, but I mean, I don't know.
[01:11:19.840 --> 01:11:20.880] I think of her as one.
[01:11:20.880 --> 01:11:22.960] I was going to say the editor-in-chief of Essence.
[01:11:22.960 --> 01:11:25.280] But I think she's so fascinating.
[01:11:25.280 --> 01:11:31.680] I think that the way she moves through spaces so unapologetically, so boldly, I like the way she plays.
[01:11:31.760 --> 01:11:32.240] I like words.
[01:11:32.240 --> 01:11:34.720] I like the way she places words when she's speaking.
[01:11:34.720 --> 01:11:36.640] And I was just, I'm just curious about her.
[01:11:36.640 --> 01:11:39.920] Like, I would love to, yeah, I'd love to see what it's like in her world.
[01:11:39.920 --> 01:11:45.440] Number three, what is a non-negotiable part of your day these days?
[01:11:45.440 --> 01:11:46.400] Oh, yes.
[01:11:46.880 --> 01:11:51.840] So I wake up at 5 a.m., not on some crazy strange line.
[01:11:52.000 --> 01:11:52.800] No, no.
[01:11:53.120 --> 01:11:55.600] I have been an early bird since I was a little kid.
[01:11:55.600 --> 01:11:58.400] Like, I'm also knocked out by like 9 p.m.
[01:11:58.560 --> 01:11:59.600] Like late, I'm sleepy.
[01:11:59.600 --> 01:12:01.080] Like, like I have grandpa hours.
[01:12:01.400 --> 01:12:10.120] So, but having that early morning moment to myself is truly sometimes I work out, sometimes I sit still, sometimes I scroll, sometimes I talk to God.
[01:12:10.120 --> 01:12:10.840] It doesn't matter.
[01:12:10.840 --> 01:12:12.280] I just need a moment.
[01:12:12.280 --> 01:12:13.000] Yes.
[01:12:13.560 --> 01:12:14.200] Yes.
[01:12:14.520 --> 01:12:20.440] Number four, what is a personal trait that has really contributed to your success?
[01:12:21.080 --> 01:12:28.520] So on the, is it the, it's not the Enneagram, one of those personality tests, it says that I'm a wooer, like W-O-O-Wooer.
[01:12:30.600 --> 01:12:32.760] I like to woo people.
[01:12:33.080 --> 01:12:34.920] And so that takes, right?
[01:12:35.000 --> 01:12:36.280] It takes me back to my early years.
[01:12:36.280 --> 01:12:37.800] I'm like, that's why I was successful.
[01:12:37.800 --> 01:12:39.720] I'm just working the room.
[01:12:39.960 --> 01:12:40.360] I do.
[01:12:40.360 --> 01:12:43.400] I like having little romanticized moments with people.
[01:12:43.400 --> 01:12:43.800] Yeah.
[01:12:43.800 --> 01:12:45.560] It helps a lot with my work.
[01:12:45.560 --> 01:12:47.320] I'm telling you, it's a gift.
[01:12:47.320 --> 01:12:48.680] And I could see that.
[01:12:48.920 --> 01:12:49.720] Just talking to you.
[01:12:49.720 --> 01:12:50.520] It's all over you.
[01:12:50.520 --> 01:12:51.480] It's in your essence.
[01:12:51.480 --> 01:12:52.040] All right.
[01:12:52.440 --> 01:13:03.560] And then finally, what is your parting advice for fellow women entrepreneurs who want to go out on their own eventually, but are worried about losing a steady paycheck?
[01:13:03.880 --> 01:13:06.360] Insist on steadiness.
[01:13:06.360 --> 01:13:08.520] Insist on stability.
[01:13:08.520 --> 01:13:10.840] Insist on being held.
[01:13:11.320 --> 01:13:19.720] Like, just have, trust that you can have the most extreme of high standards for yourself and move.
[01:13:19.720 --> 01:13:21.080] Like, insist on it.
[01:13:21.080 --> 01:13:24.920] Know that you, you can insist on that and set those boundaries, set those standards, and the world will respond.
[01:13:24.920 --> 01:13:26.120] You'll repel what needs to be repelled.
[01:13:26.120 --> 01:13:27.720] You'll attract what you need to retract.
[01:13:27.720 --> 01:13:29.880] It's just how it works.
[01:13:30.200 --> 01:13:31.960] Oh, I love that.
[01:13:31.960 --> 01:13:34.200] I, ooh, I needed that.
[01:13:34.200 --> 01:13:34.840] Oh, my God.
[01:13:34.840 --> 01:13:36.120] I got chills all over me.
[01:13:36.120 --> 01:13:37.880] I got chills all over me.
[01:13:37.880 --> 01:13:41.480] That was just the perfect note to end this conversation on.
[01:13:41.480 --> 01:13:43.480] And, you know, Monique, is there anything we didn't touch on?
[01:13:43.480 --> 01:13:46.640] I don't usually ask this, but I just feel like you have so much to offer.
[01:13:46.800 --> 01:13:48.640] So, is there anything we didn't touch on?
[01:13:48.640 --> 01:13:51.280] Any last words of wisdom that you just want to share?
[01:13:51.280 --> 01:13:52.960] I'm so grateful to have been here.
[01:13:52.960 --> 01:13:54.000] I think I'll say two things.
[01:13:54.000 --> 01:14:00.960] Number one, for anyone who's coming to Rachel Rogers' conference this summer in June in California, I'll be there.
[01:14:00.960 --> 01:14:02.400] So I'd love to meet you if you happen to be.
[01:14:02.400 --> 01:14:04.400] I know your audience might represent a good point.
[01:14:04.640 --> 01:14:04.960] Yes, yeah.
[01:14:04.960 --> 01:14:06.800] We had Rachel on just a few weeks ago.
[01:14:06.800 --> 01:14:07.680] So all right.
[01:14:07.680 --> 01:14:08.880] So I'll be at her conference.
[01:14:08.880 --> 01:14:10.080] I'd love to meet you.
[01:14:10.480 --> 01:14:26.400] And then, number two, as a parting piece of wisdom, one of the things that I am constantly sitting with and sharing with my clients, and I hope this unburdens you as well, is that whatever it is that you're facing down next, whatever challenge it is that you're trying to take on or figure out, you don't need more.
[01:14:26.400 --> 01:14:28.160] You're not deficient in anything.
[01:14:28.160 --> 01:14:29.520] There's no deficit within you.
[01:14:29.520 --> 01:14:34.320] You don't need to take on anything new, tack on anything new, build yourself up more.
[01:14:34.320 --> 01:14:35.840] Usually, you need to release.
[01:14:35.840 --> 01:14:38.640] So focus on what you need to let go.
[01:14:38.640 --> 01:14:41.760] And yeah, let that be your energy.
[01:14:41.760 --> 01:14:43.600] Let yourself release.
[01:14:44.240 --> 01:14:49.680] I'm telling you, it's like you're always just, you're just speaking life over me, always.
[01:14:49.680 --> 01:14:53.040] Like, I have been in that energy of like, what else can I do?
[01:14:53.040 --> 01:14:54.240] What else can I learn?
[01:14:54.240 --> 01:14:55.520] How can I figure this out?
[01:14:55.520 --> 01:14:57.760] And it's like, you're enough.
[01:14:57.760 --> 01:14:59.360] You have it in you.
[01:14:59.360 --> 01:15:01.280] What can you release?
[01:15:02.240 --> 01:15:03.360] It's true.
[01:15:03.360 --> 01:15:03.680] It's true.
[01:15:03.680 --> 01:15:05.200] It's true, release, y'all.
[01:15:05.200 --> 01:15:09.280] And so, where can people connect with you after this episode?
[01:15:09.280 --> 01:15:10.000] Yes.
[01:15:10.240 --> 01:15:14.320] So, certainly, I'm on mostly just Instagram, a little bit of LinkedIn as well.
[01:15:14.320 --> 01:15:15.040] But Monique R.
[01:15:15.040 --> 01:15:16.000] Shields is my handle.
[01:15:16.000 --> 01:15:17.200] I can't forget that R.
[01:15:17.520 --> 01:15:20.000] And my website is moniquershields.com.
[01:15:20.000 --> 01:15:24.800] You can learn all the things there, connect to all the stuff, and even apply to work with me as well.
[01:15:24.800 --> 01:15:25.440] Yes.
[01:15:25.440 --> 01:15:28.320] Thank you, Monique, so much for being in the guest chair.
[01:15:28.320 --> 01:15:31.240] You guys also listen to Ambition Without Compromise.
[01:15:31.240 --> 01:15:36.200] Get your whole life every month, every, you know, every other week, like I do.
[01:15:36.840 --> 01:15:40.280] And with that, I will talk to y'all next week.
[01:15:41.880 --> 01:15:44.920] Hey, guys, thanks for listening to Side Hustle Pro.
[01:15:44.920 --> 01:15:49.640] If you like the show, be sure to subscribe, rate, and review on Apple Podcasts.
[01:15:49.640 --> 01:15:53.400] It helps other side hustlers just like you to find the show.
[01:15:53.400 --> 01:15:58.040] And if you want to hear more from me, you can follow me on Instagram at SideHustle Pro.
[01:15:58.040 --> 01:16:05.160] Plus, sign up for my six-foot Saturday newsletter at sidehustlepro.co/slash newsletter.
[01:16:05.160 --> 01:16:12.520] When you sign up, you will receive weekly nuggets from me, including what I'm up to, personal lessons, and my business tip of the week.
[01:16:12.520 --> 01:16:17.240] Again, that's sidehustlepro.co/slash newsletter to sign up.
[01:16:17.240 --> 01:16:18.680] Talk to you soon.
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Prompt 6: Key Takeaways

Now please extract the key takeaways from the transcript content I provided.

Extract the most important key takeaways from this part of the conversation. Use a single sentence statement (the key takeaway) rather than milquetoast descriptions like "the hosts discuss...". 

Limit the key takeaways to a maximum of 3. The key takeaways should be insightful and knowledge-additive. 

IMPORTANT: Return ONLY valid JSON, no explanations or markdown. Ensure:
- All strings are properly quoted and escaped
- No trailing commas
- All braces and brackets are balanced
Format: {"key_takeaways": ["takeaway 1", "takeaway 2"]}

Prompt 7: Segments

Now identify 2-4 distinct topical segments from this part of the conversation.

For each segment, identify:
- Descriptive title (3-6 words)  
- START timestamp when this topic begins (HH:MM:SS format)
- Double check that the timestamp is accurate - a timestamp will NEVER be greater than the total length of the audio
- Most important Key takeaway from that segment. Key takeaway must be specific and knowledge-additive.
- Brief summary of the discussion

IMPORTANT: The timestamp should mark when the topic/segment STARTS, not a range. Look for topic transitions and conversation shifts.

Return ONLY valid JSON. Ensure all strings are properly quoted, no trailing commas:
{
  "segments": [
    {
      "segment_title": "Topic Discussion", 
      "timestamp": "01:15:30",
      "key_takeaway": "main point from this segment",
      "segment_summary": "brief description of what was discussed"
    }
  ]
}

Timestamp format: HH:MM:SS (e.g., 00:05:30, 01:22:45) marking the START of each segment.

Prompt 8: Media Mentions

Now scan the transcript content I provided for ACTUAL mentions of specific media titles:

Find explicit mentions of:
- Books (with specific titles)
- Movies (with specific titles)  
- TV Shows (with specific titles)
- Music/Songs (with specific titles)

DO NOT include:
- Websites, URLs, or web services
- Other podcasts or podcast names

IMPORTANT: 
- Only include items explicitly mentioned by name. Do not invent titles.
- Valid categories are: "Book", "Movie", "TV Show", "Music"
- Include the exact phrase where each item was mentioned
- Find the nearest proximate timestamp where it appears in the conversation
- THE TIMESTAMP OF THE MEDIA MENTION IS IMPORTANT - DO NOT INVENT TIMESTAMPS AND DO NOT MISATTRIBUTE TIMESTAMPS
- Double check that the timestamp is accurate - a timestamp will NEVER be greater than the total length of the audio
- Timestamps are given as ranges, e.g. 01:13:42.520 --> 01:13:46.720. Use the EARLIER of the 2 timestamps in the range.

Return ONLY valid JSON. Ensure all strings are properly quoted and escaped, no trailing commas:
{
  "media_mentions": [
    {
      "title": "Exact Title as Mentioned",
      "category": "Book",
      "author_artist": "N/A",
      "context": "Brief context of why it was mentioned",
      "context_phrase": "The exact sentence or phrase where it was mentioned",
      "timestamp": "estimated time like 01:15:30"
    }
  ]
}

If no media is mentioned, return: {"media_mentions": []}

Full Transcript

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[00:01:32.480 --> 00:01:40.880] A lot of us actually need to start to dismantle some of the identities we've taken on unknowingly.
[00:01:41.200 --> 00:01:49.920] You're listening to Side Hustle Pro, the podcast that teaches you to build and grow your side hustle from passion project to profitable business.
[00:01:49.920 --> 00:01:52.800] And I'm your host, Nikayla Matthews-Okome.
[00:01:52.800 --> 00:01:54.640] So let's get started.
[00:01:57.840 --> 00:01:58.480] Hey, friends.
[00:01:58.480 --> 00:01:59.040] Hey, welcome.
[00:01:59.040 --> 00:01:59.960] Welcome back to the show.
[00:01:59.960 --> 00:02:04.280] It's Nikayla here, and today we are diving into an episode with Monique R.
[00:01:59.680 --> 00:02:04.760] Shields.
[00:02:04.920 --> 00:02:12.280] Monique is an executive coach, founder of Seven Pines Leadership, and podcast host of Ambition Without Compromise.
[00:02:12.280 --> 00:02:19.480] She is committed to liberating the professional imaginations of women of color CEOs, founders, and leaders.
[00:02:19.480 --> 00:02:40.360] As a coach, Monique leverages her own entrepreneurial and executive experience, plus nearly a decade combined of training in coactive mindset coaching, motivational interviewing, interpersonal dynamics, team building, and communications to help her clients find higher forms of leadership and intention in their lives and their business.
[00:02:40.360 --> 00:02:55.480] Monique was formerly on staff at the Stanford Graduate School of Business as a facilitator for their Women in Management program, as well as at UC Berkeley's Haas School of Business as a leadership coach for current MBAs and alumni executives.
[00:02:55.480 --> 00:03:05.400] Prior to launching Seven Pines, Monique was the director of coaching and then the director of partnerships at Joyable, a mental health technology startup in San Francisco.
[00:03:05.400 --> 00:03:16.920] Monique understands what it means to move through fear and distraction, to clarify, communicate, and act on a unique definition of success that refuses to compromise what matters most.
[00:03:16.920 --> 00:03:20.760] And she brings this perspective to the work she does with her clients.
[00:03:20.760 --> 00:03:32.440] Specifically, Monique specializes in helping high-achieving women of color business owners and leaders, especially mothers, balance ambition and freedom without burning out.
[00:03:32.440 --> 00:03:42.520] So, I met Monique after she applied to be a VIP podcast coaching client, and we worked together last year, but our relationship has evolved to much more than that.
[00:03:42.520 --> 00:03:48.880] I see Monique as a true gift and a light that has come into my life, and she can be a light for you as well.
[00:03:48.880 --> 00:04:02.960] So, that's why I really wanted to share this episode and just hearing how she thinks and the clarity that she can bring in just a few moments of having a conversation or bringing up a topic that's challenging me right now.
[00:04:02.960 --> 00:04:08.000] I hope will help you guys to see why I just think that her brain is just phenomenal.
[00:04:08.000 --> 00:04:10.240] So, let's jump right into it.
[00:04:12.800 --> 00:04:14.320] All right, all right.
[00:04:14.320 --> 00:04:17.760] So, Monique, welcome officially to the guest chair.
[00:04:17.760 --> 00:04:18.320] Thank you.
[00:04:18.320 --> 00:04:21.040] I'm super excited to be here, Nikayla.
[00:04:21.360 --> 00:04:23.200] I am so excited to have you.
[00:04:23.200 --> 00:04:30.080] And let me tell you, I love looking at your crisp, clear camera.
[00:04:30.080 --> 00:04:32.560] And you know, I love your setup.
[00:04:32.560 --> 00:04:38.160] So, guys, if you're not already tuning in on YouTube, please go and check out Monique's setup.
[00:04:38.160 --> 00:04:42.080] But as we were speaking today, I'm rocking my Spelman blue.
[00:04:42.080 --> 00:04:45.920] I didn't go to Spelman, y'all, but coincidentally, I'm rocking that.
[00:04:45.920 --> 00:04:57.520] And I thought it would be remiss for us not to touch on the fact that you just are literally on the heels of coming off of your 20-year reunion from Spelman College.
[00:04:57.520 --> 00:04:58.320] Yes.
[00:04:58.320 --> 00:04:59.840] What are your reflections?
[00:04:59.840 --> 00:05:06.480] Just your brief reflections on Monique 20 years ago and Monique the woman today.
[00:05:06.480 --> 00:05:07.760] Ciao.
[00:05:07.760 --> 00:05:09.840] Well, I'm so, so happy to be here.
[00:05:09.840 --> 00:05:14.000] And I am honestly still coming down from that trip to Spelman.
[00:05:14.000 --> 00:05:14.960] 20 years.
[00:05:14.960 --> 00:05:21.760] I'm like, there's a version of me as 17 years old stepping onto that campus that I remember so, so well.
[00:05:21.760 --> 00:05:28.480] And she was mostly terrified, like mostly terrified.
[00:05:28.480 --> 00:05:31.240] I'm from a really small town in the Midwest.
[00:05:29.680 --> 00:05:34.360] There's a lot of the world that I have still not seen yet.
[00:05:34.360 --> 00:05:38.200] And just being in Atlanta alone was like a whole thing.
[00:05:38.200 --> 00:05:40.280] I was so, so excited to be there.
[00:05:40.280 --> 00:05:48.280] And then just amongst all of these young black women who were coming from, yeah, just a myriad backgrounds that I had.
[00:05:48.520 --> 00:05:53.000] I just had never been the diversity within the diversity of us like that before in my entire life.
[00:05:53.000 --> 00:05:56.760] And so, yeah, I just reflect on how mind-blown I was back then.
[00:05:56.760 --> 00:06:07.160] And then thinking about now how that's my norm and how that, you know, has obviously shaped a lot of what I do with my focus being on women of color.
[00:06:07.160 --> 00:06:17.960] I feel like I know us, you know, the courses and things that are just like requirements at Spelman, deepen a certain kind of understanding of our experience that I know supports the work that I do today.
[00:06:17.960 --> 00:06:21.800] But yeah, I mean, that place shaped me.
[00:06:21.800 --> 00:06:24.440] It shaped me and it's one of the best decisions I've ever made.
[00:06:24.440 --> 00:06:30.200] We are grateful to Spelman then because the work you are doing is so impactful.
[00:06:30.200 --> 00:06:35.160] And you guys, I mentioned in the intro how I consider Monique my unofficial coach.
[00:06:35.160 --> 00:06:37.320] She will be my coach one day.
[00:06:37.880 --> 00:06:46.520] But for now, I want to share with you all just how Monique has impacted my life in the time we've known each other.
[00:06:46.520 --> 00:06:50.760] So what was your initial career path coming out of Spelman?
[00:06:51.080 --> 00:06:56.200] Yeah, so I was an English major at Spelman, and I was a lost English major.
[00:06:56.200 --> 00:06:57.800] I wasn't one of those young majors that came in.
[00:06:58.680 --> 00:06:59.160] I know.
[00:06:59.160 --> 00:06:59.720] I didn't know.
[00:06:59.720 --> 00:07:01.320] I came in, I didn't know what I wanted to do.
[00:07:01.320 --> 00:07:07.240] And I just saw, I met some upperclassmen who were saying, well, you could go into publicity or you could go become a lawyer.
[00:07:07.320 --> 00:07:08.680] So I was like, okay, I could do those things.
[00:07:08.680 --> 00:07:09.880] I love words.
[00:07:09.880 --> 00:07:10.600] So I did that.
[00:07:10.600 --> 00:07:13.640] Actually, my first job out of school was at Simon Schuster Publishing.
[00:07:13.880 --> 00:07:19.760] I was, there was this kind of special rotational program for like fresh college graduates.
[00:07:19.760 --> 00:07:21.120] I remember being in that space.
[00:07:21.120 --> 00:07:36.640] And one of the things I think I learned most from my early experience of transitioning into publishing was like the critical value of relationships because one of the main reasons I got that job was there was a black woman who I interned for at CBS television.
[00:07:36.640 --> 00:07:45.200] And she had the CEO make a phone call on my behalf and said, Monique, at that time, my last name was Brantley.
[00:07:45.360 --> 00:07:47.760] Monique Brantley, you need to take a look at her resume.
[00:07:47.760 --> 00:07:50.800] She needs to have real consideration.
[00:07:50.800 --> 00:07:54.560] And I was like, oh, so this is how the world works for real.
[00:07:54.560 --> 00:07:57.120] Like this is these relationships really, really deeply matter.
[00:07:57.120 --> 00:07:58.960] So yeah, that's how I, that's how I started.
[00:07:58.960 --> 00:08:03.440] Now, from there, so you have dabbled in a few industries, like many of us, right?
[00:08:03.440 --> 00:08:05.840] You spent some time in banking.
[00:08:05.840 --> 00:08:07.760] How did that happen?
[00:08:08.080 --> 00:08:09.760] Girl, student loans.
[00:08:09.760 --> 00:08:14.480] I was like, the English publisher won't play.
[00:08:15.120 --> 00:08:15.680] Okay.
[00:08:15.680 --> 00:08:18.800] Spelman was like, you got some bills to pay.
[00:08:19.280 --> 00:08:22.960] So yeah, I love the time that I spent at Simon Schuster.
[00:08:23.120 --> 00:08:24.960] But publishing is not, it's not banking.
[00:08:24.960 --> 00:08:26.320] It's not raining dollars on you.
[00:08:26.320 --> 00:08:29.360] And it wasn't something that I was personally extremely passionate about.
[00:08:29.360 --> 00:08:32.720] And so I was like, okay, I need to go and secure some stability for myself.
[00:08:32.720 --> 00:08:35.760] And I had a bunch of friends who were bankers and working in finance.
[00:08:35.760 --> 00:08:40.880] And I was like, okay, I'm not a banker, but what are some of the back office opportunities that I can find?
[00:08:40.880 --> 00:08:51.360] So I moved into an asset management firm and I kind of became the everything person for it was a very small firm that was doing very, very well for itself.
[00:08:51.360 --> 00:08:54.720] I became the everything person for the CEO at the time.
[00:08:54.720 --> 00:08:55.360] And then I met.
[00:08:55.440 --> 00:08:56.880] Like the chief of staff?
[00:08:57.200 --> 00:09:03.400] Essentially, yeah, if there was a chief of staff, that's probably what I was because he used to just, I was interviewing people at the VP.
[00:08:59.840 --> 00:09:04.920] I'm like 23 years old.
[00:09:05.160 --> 00:09:08.120] Like he's having me do, help me organize data rooms.
[00:09:08.120 --> 00:09:09.080] I was doing all kinds of stuff.
[00:09:09.080 --> 00:09:11.080] I didn't have no business, but he really believed in me.
[00:09:11.080 --> 00:09:12.200] Shout out to Boris.
[00:09:12.200 --> 00:09:13.800] Shout out to my old boss, Boris.
[00:09:15.000 --> 00:09:15.480] Boris.
[00:09:15.720 --> 00:09:16.840] Shout out to Boris.
[00:09:16.840 --> 00:09:24.680] But yeah, then I moved into investment banking in the back office and I was doing like a lot of what we called data services management.
[00:09:24.680 --> 00:09:26.760] So all of the research and things that our bankers use.
[00:09:26.760 --> 00:09:27.880] I was managing all that stuff.
[00:09:27.880 --> 00:09:29.640] I was supporting the compliance team.
[00:09:29.640 --> 00:09:36.120] I was, I was doing all, I just became kind of like a Swiss Army knife person doing all the back office operational things.
[00:09:36.120 --> 00:09:38.280] So earned a lot and made money.
[00:09:38.280 --> 00:09:38.920] Oh, good.
[00:09:39.320 --> 00:09:40.360] I love to hear that.
[00:09:40.360 --> 00:09:40.920] Right.
[00:09:40.920 --> 00:09:53.560] At that time, were you starting to see yourself being driven to people understanding their whys, understanding, or just even observing how they could be more effective as leaders?
[00:09:53.560 --> 00:09:56.360] Was that when that seed started to be planted?
[00:09:56.680 --> 00:10:00.840] I think the seed was planted, but I don't know that I was aware of it at that time.
[00:10:01.400 --> 00:10:05.160] Because, as I said, I started out working even at Simon Schuster.
[00:10:05.160 --> 00:10:08.920] I was working for the SVP directly in the role that I had there.
[00:10:08.920 --> 00:10:11.160] I was only working with the most senior people.
[00:10:11.160 --> 00:10:17.800] And so that, what that did for me is it humanized the people who everybody's like, they're scared to step into their office.
[00:10:17.800 --> 00:10:19.240] They're scared to approach in the lunchroom.
[00:10:19.240 --> 00:10:21.000] I was like, oh, like, that's Joe.
[00:10:21.000 --> 00:10:22.440] That's, you know, that's Robin.
[00:10:22.440 --> 00:10:23.000] That's whoever.
[00:10:23.000 --> 00:10:24.440] Like, that's such and such.
[00:10:24.440 --> 00:10:29.720] They felt regular to me in a way that I think is unique to experience that early in my career.
[00:10:29.720 --> 00:10:35.320] And so I got to see my value to people at that senior level early on.
[00:10:35.320 --> 00:10:41.160] And I remember I did have like faint sort of musings of like, I could become like an advisor to leaders like this one day.
[00:10:41.160 --> 00:10:42.920] Like, these are regular people.
[00:10:42.920 --> 00:10:47.840] They need, they need regular people's support that they don't get access to.
[00:10:44.840 --> 00:10:50.320] So that's, I would say, the seed that was planted.
[00:10:50.640 --> 00:11:05.120] That is such a blessing because I remember being that age and starting and working at these companies and seeing the execs pass you in the elevator bank and having that like intimidation, like, oh my God, that's the CEO, that's the president.
[00:11:06.000 --> 00:11:12.720] So what a blessing to have that human interaction with them from an early stage in your career.
[00:11:12.720 --> 00:11:13.280] Yeah.
[00:11:13.280 --> 00:11:13.520] Yeah.
[00:11:13.520 --> 00:11:14.800] It made a difference.
[00:11:14.800 --> 00:11:26.880] One of the things I love about your story is the fact that you do what we often talk about on this show is when you are starting out, if you can have your company pay for training, do that.
[00:11:26.880 --> 00:11:30.960] Like squeeze as much as you can out of your resources, your benefits.
[00:11:30.960 --> 00:11:36.640] So which company or which role were you in when you pursued a certification in coaching?
[00:11:36.960 --> 00:11:42.720] So at that point, I had transitioned out of finance and I was working at a startup, as a matter of fact.
[00:11:42.720 --> 00:11:44.960] So at that start, it was a mental health startup.
[00:11:45.200 --> 00:11:46.560] I had become the director of coaching.
[00:11:46.560 --> 00:11:49.680] I was there for four years, helped build, I learned a lot of things entrepreneurally.
[00:11:49.680 --> 00:11:56.960] But in that time, I had a fantastic relationship with my boss, who was the COO, and we were in lockstep around my development.
[00:11:56.960 --> 00:12:03.520] And so, because what I wanted to do connected to what I was already doing coaching, but it was for mental health, right?
[00:12:03.520 --> 00:12:06.160] I was doing cognitive behavioral science stuff.
[00:12:06.160 --> 00:12:10.960] It was kind of an easy sell to bring that experience in-house.
[00:12:10.960 --> 00:12:14.560] So it's like we don't have anybody here who's actually certified in coaching.
[00:12:14.560 --> 00:12:16.240] Why don't I go get that for us?
[00:12:16.240 --> 00:12:16.720] Yes.
[00:12:18.560 --> 00:12:21.840] And then also planting the seeds for my future because that's something I take with me, right?
[00:12:21.840 --> 00:12:23.040] That's what we get to do.
[00:12:23.040 --> 00:12:24.640] So that's how that worked out for me.
[00:12:24.640 --> 00:12:25.120] Yeah, Kate.
[00:12:25.200 --> 00:12:28.560] How did you become the director of coaching?
[00:12:28.560 --> 00:12:29.720] Ciao.
[00:12:31.000 --> 00:12:31.640] Being there.
[00:12:31.720 --> 00:12:32.520] Did you love it?
[00:12:29.120 --> 00:12:36.280] You know, being in the things, being on top of the things, and raising my hand.
[00:12:36.360 --> 00:12:42.040] I think that's a big part of it as well is like, because I had that relationship with my boss.
[00:12:42.040 --> 00:14:05.760] it was clear you know like what i wanted what i was good at um how to utilize me my final year there was actually the director of partnerships because i start up life it was like that's what we needed and so that's how i became when i came back from maternity leave they're like okay you're director of partnerships now like okay cool well the two align because you're so in tune to people what they need and so i can see i can see that transferable shift happening but what i love about your experience is it is about what you've done but it it mostly is about who you are i think you innately have a gift right i think you are innately meant and called to do the work that you're doing and helping people to navigate ambition in this world that just they're just it's almost like you're on a you're in a video game and like you're just trying to go down you're just trying to drive down the street and then all of a sudden things just keep coming in your pathway that's what it feels like in all aspects of life right and so we need someone like you who does that and i don't want to talk in generalities so i would love for you to to kind of breakdown, what it means to be a coach, what it means to help people executive coach.
[00:14:05.760 --> 00:14:16.160] We can start there, right when you when you moved into executive coaching for places like fortune 500 companies or even when you were working at stanford, what does that look like?
[00:14:14.680 --> 00:14:22.240] So it looks a lot like I honestly, that early seed I was talking about that was planted.
[00:14:22.240 --> 00:14:27.520] It looks like creating space for someone's humanity to exist.
[00:14:28.160 --> 00:14:40.320] Because when we feel connected with the truth of who we are and how we actually feel, and then we get to know what we actually think and what our imaginations can bring us to, we get to dream forward that, you know, those big visions that we talk about.
[00:14:40.320 --> 00:14:44.800] So I see the role that I play as an executive coach as someone who's really unblocking.
[00:14:44.800 --> 00:14:52.160] Like I'm helping to create space for people to just be more fully expressed, be more of who they already are, right?
[00:14:52.480 --> 00:15:03.440] Because so many of the spaces that we're operating in, especially because I focus on women leaders, require us to contort ourselves or to occupy a certain kind of posture and to look a certain way and to be on.
[00:15:03.440 --> 00:15:06.880] So where do you have that space where you can really hear yourself, right?
[00:15:06.880 --> 00:15:14.240] Where you can really, because you're also already, you know, the women I'm working with are extremely capable, competent, high-achieving people, right?
[00:15:14.240 --> 00:15:25.920] But you can high achieve yourself into a very strange predicament, you know, going in the wrong direction if you haven't had time to actually re, you know, reassess, locate yourself, and get centered.
[00:15:25.920 --> 00:15:35.280] So that's, that's a big part of what I do is making sure that my clients don't go through that process alone and that they don't experience that extreme distancing from themselves.
[00:15:35.280 --> 00:15:37.360] They get to come back into themselves.
[00:15:38.000 --> 00:15:38.720] It's funny.
[00:15:38.720 --> 00:15:44.800] I was literally just talking to someone this week about that feeling of needing to be on.
[00:15:44.800 --> 00:15:47.360] And I just got back from a conference, actually.
[00:15:47.360 --> 00:15:53.040] So I was talking to the founder and organizer about, you know, when I walked in here, of course, I was in like business mode, right?
[00:15:53.040 --> 00:15:54.560] I'm like, oh, I'm used to this.
[00:15:54.560 --> 00:15:55.360] I do this, right?
[00:15:55.360 --> 00:15:55.920] I'm on.
[00:15:55.920 --> 00:15:56.400] I got it.
[00:15:56.400 --> 00:15:58.160] Like, I'm ready to show up.
[00:15:58.160 --> 00:16:10.760] And then after a few minutes and a couple hours of just being in the space with this particular group who was having, it was called the Side Hustle Economy Summit out in Indianapolis, hosted by Anthony Murdoch.
[00:16:10.760 --> 00:16:15.000] And I mean, what they're doing there is just so special.
[00:16:15.000 --> 00:16:18.360] And I said, wait, I could be myself.
[00:16:18.360 --> 00:16:30.200] It was like, this, like, and it's not like, and as I was trying to explain to him, it's not like I wasn't myself, but there's just something different when you realize, oh, I don't, there's nothing to prove here.
[00:16:30.520 --> 00:16:31.640] They believe me.
[00:16:31.640 --> 00:16:41.160] Whereas in some other, when you occupy some other spaces or predominantly white spaces at times, the first layer is, oh, I have to prove I belong here.
[00:16:41.160 --> 00:16:43.640] And then it's like, then you can let go on your guard.
[00:16:43.640 --> 00:16:48.360] But that needing to be on, so to speak, is a real thing.
[00:16:48.360 --> 00:16:50.520] And everyone can say, oh, just show up as yourself.
[00:16:50.520 --> 00:16:52.440] I don't have to prove anything to anybody.
[00:16:52.440 --> 00:16:56.520] That's just not the reality of some of these spaces that we go into.
[00:16:56.520 --> 00:17:00.440] Corporate spaces are not designed for anybody to be their full authentic selves.
[00:17:00.440 --> 00:17:07.480] You have to decide what pieces of you are safe here, what pieces of you are advantageous to share here.
[00:17:07.720 --> 00:17:10.360] But a lot needs to be held for you.
[00:17:10.360 --> 00:17:14.280] You need to, you know, it's, it's definitely a, you have to kind of design yourself a certain way.
[00:17:14.280 --> 00:17:15.000] It's just what it is.
[00:17:15.080 --> 00:17:16.760] And there's just too many characters.
[00:17:16.760 --> 00:17:19.880] Again, like the video game, you don't really know people.
[00:17:19.880 --> 00:17:23.160] So you have to decide what is safe to share with this character.
[00:17:23.160 --> 00:17:24.680] Who is this character, really?
[00:17:25.000 --> 00:17:27.800] You know, who are who is like the game of survivor, too?
[00:17:27.800 --> 00:17:33.400] Like, who, who's their alliance and what's going to happen with information that I give to them?
[00:17:33.400 --> 00:17:33.800] It is.
[00:17:34.200 --> 00:17:35.480] It is absolutely a game.
[00:17:35.480 --> 00:17:38.680] I love that you're sticking with this metaphor because it's like you can't ever forget that.
[00:17:38.680 --> 00:17:43.480] You really can't, you know, that we're playing a game and it's about learning the rules of that game.
[00:17:48.640 --> 00:17:55.120] How did you learn the rules of the game and also free yourself from that particular atmosphere?
[00:17:55.120 --> 00:17:56.000] You know what?
[00:17:56.000 --> 00:17:59.440] I think I never fully learned all the rules of the game.
[00:17:59.440 --> 00:18:01.040] Meaning, well, I shouldn't say learn.
[00:18:01.040 --> 00:18:03.040] I learned them, but I wasn't interested in them.
[00:18:03.040 --> 00:18:08.960] So I decided, I think fairly early on, like I said, I started a Viacom company, Simon  Schuster, huge.
[00:18:09.360 --> 00:18:14.080] Then I moved to a mid-size, you know, smaller firm, and then a mid-size investment bank.
[00:18:14.080 --> 00:18:23.040] Then I moved to a startup because I think I was just subconsciously backing my way out of large corporate settings because I was like, this is not really a fit for me long term.
[00:18:23.840 --> 00:18:30.560] And so, yeah, I think I was like, I don't really want to spend so much energy trying to play all of the games.
[00:18:30.560 --> 00:18:34.000] Now, look, any kind of work setting that you're in, there's always going to be some politicking.
[00:18:34.000 --> 00:18:41.360] There's always going to be, there's interpersonal dynamics you have to manage, but it's a very different game in these much larger spaces.
[00:18:41.520 --> 00:18:43.680] And that's also a big part of the work that I do with my clients.
[00:18:43.680 --> 00:18:48.800] It's like, I'm not the coach you go to when you just want to learn how to play the politics better.
[00:18:48.800 --> 00:18:50.640] I'm not the coach for that.
[00:18:50.640 --> 00:18:56.240] And I'm not, there's no judgment if that's like, girl, that's where I'm at and that's what I need to do is focus on these politics.
[00:18:56.240 --> 00:19:00.160] But I'm more so for the woman who is, I'm trying to free myself of these politics.
[00:19:00.160 --> 00:19:02.480] I want to occupy more of who it is that I am.
[00:19:02.480 --> 00:19:07.840] I want to make sure I'm choosing whether it's employment or starting my own business or growing my existing business.
[00:19:08.640 --> 00:19:11.280] A lot of my clients are entrepreneurs as well.
[00:19:11.280 --> 00:19:13.200] That it's, I'm writing my own rules.
[00:19:13.200 --> 00:19:16.880] This is a game that I'm designing.
[00:19:16.880 --> 00:19:17.360] Right.
[00:19:17.600 --> 00:19:35.960] And I do love that you say, you know, that you're not here to judge because something else I heard recently was actually at that same conference was we just have to remember, instead of shaming ourselves for decisions we have made or are about to make, that remember, a lot of these decisions are rooted in survival.
[00:19:36.120 --> 00:19:42.600] And you need to do what you need to do in that moment or in this moment to put your survival first, right?
[00:19:42.600 --> 00:19:46.200] Like you need income, you need a roof over your head, and all these other things.
[00:19:46.680 --> 00:19:57.560] However, when you do have space and time to be able to think beyond surviving to thriving, this is the conversation and this is the kind of coaching that you're here to do.
[00:19:57.560 --> 00:19:58.440] Absolutely.
[00:19:58.440 --> 00:19:59.160] Absolutely.
[00:19:59.160 --> 00:20:01.880] And sometimes it's about, you know, we're always in seasons, right?
[00:20:01.880 --> 00:20:09.720] I have lots of clients who are like, I came to this big company because there was a season I needed where I needed, I'm trying to, I'm going to have two, three kids, four kids.
[00:20:09.880 --> 00:20:12.680] And I want, I want the benefits package that goes with them four kids.
[00:20:12.840 --> 00:20:15.320] You know, and that's the IVF package sometimes.
[00:20:15.640 --> 00:20:16.040] Okay.
[00:20:16.120 --> 00:20:17.800] Hardened and leave package sometimes.
[00:20:17.800 --> 00:20:18.120] Yes.
[00:20:18.360 --> 00:20:19.720] Packages are real.
[00:20:19.720 --> 00:20:20.200] Okay.
[00:20:20.440 --> 00:20:23.320] And so, yeah, we do what we need to do.
[00:20:23.320 --> 00:20:34.360] And sometimes it's about like, but I've not lost sight of my North Star and how can I figure out how to still plant seeds in this season before I'm ready to necessarily like make the big leap or, you know, I want to backstep.
[00:20:34.360 --> 00:20:38.200] I know something you talk about a lot too, is just how we can baby step our way into transition.
[00:20:38.840 --> 00:20:43.320] So, um, so yeah, that's a big part of what I will share as well in my work.
[00:20:43.320 --> 00:20:49.560] That's timely too that you mentioned that because now I want to talk about your own transition into entrepreneurship.
[00:20:49.560 --> 00:20:51.400] First of all, what did you decide, right?
[00:20:51.400 --> 00:20:57.000] Like, do you remember when you decided, okay, I am going to take my skills and leave?
[00:20:57.320 --> 00:20:59.720] When I became a mom, that became really, really clear.
[00:20:59.720 --> 00:21:03.560] And like I said, I had a really wonderful experience at that startup that I was at.
[00:21:03.560 --> 00:21:04.760] I had a lot of support.
[00:21:04.760 --> 00:21:10.440] Like, they're the ones that help, you know, help subsidize and support me through my certification process and that sort of a thing.
[00:21:10.840 --> 00:21:17.120] Wonderful relationships grew a ton, but I also was still working for somebody else.
[00:21:14.840 --> 00:21:21.680] You know, I'm still working on somebody else's timeline and growing somebody else's business.
[00:21:22.000 --> 00:21:33.760] And I was like, I think I've taken what I needed to take from this season and I have everything that I need to place this bet on myself and yeah, reclaim ownership of my time.
[00:21:33.760 --> 00:21:35.680] I had lots of privileges in that, right?
[00:21:35.680 --> 00:21:42.160] You know, not even just even getting into the fact that I have like, you know, college degrees and good experiences and things like that on my resume.
[00:21:42.160 --> 00:21:52.240] I have a supportive spouse, you know, that was enabled me to make that pivot the way that I did without having to, you know, worry so, so much financially in that transition.
[00:21:52.240 --> 00:21:58.400] Although I never stopped earning, I always found ways, you know, I really wanted to feel like I was starting something viable.
[00:21:58.400 --> 00:21:58.640] Yeah.
[00:21:58.640 --> 00:22:04.320] And I have a network that I felt very, you know, confident in being able to tap to support me in that transition.
[00:22:04.320 --> 00:22:06.080] So those things really do matter.
[00:22:06.080 --> 00:22:07.680] But motherhood did it, girl.
[00:22:07.680 --> 00:22:10.080] I was like, oh no, this is what matters.
[00:22:10.080 --> 00:22:11.920] And I need to own all of my time.
[00:22:11.920 --> 00:22:14.880] Oh, I need to own all of my time.
[00:22:14.880 --> 00:22:15.680] Yes, I want all of my time.
[00:22:15.840 --> 00:22:16.800] Just some of it.
[00:22:16.800 --> 00:22:17.520] Yes.
[00:22:17.520 --> 00:22:19.200] You know, I relate to that.
[00:22:19.200 --> 00:22:20.880] Yes, ma'am.
[00:22:22.160 --> 00:22:23.600] You never stopped earning.
[00:22:23.600 --> 00:22:24.400] I love that.
[00:22:24.400 --> 00:22:28.960] I love that because that means you also, did you test out earning before you left?
[00:22:28.960 --> 00:22:30.720] Like, did some clients?
[00:22:30.720 --> 00:22:31.200] Yeah.
[00:22:31.200 --> 00:22:31.520] Yeah.
[00:22:31.840 --> 00:22:33.440] That looked like for you.
[00:22:33.440 --> 00:22:42.720] Well, as a part of my coaching certification, this is very typical for at least like the ones that are like accredited that you usually have to have a coach and it's a, it's a paid coaching relationship.
[00:22:42.800 --> 00:22:44.720] They give you like a student rate usually.
[00:22:44.720 --> 00:22:47.840] So I had gotten used to the idea of like paying for coaches.
[00:22:47.840 --> 00:22:50.960] And I also had the requirement then of also getting clients to pay me.
[00:22:50.960 --> 00:22:53.440] So it could be a, they were like, oh, you can get a five-dollar client.
[00:22:53.400 --> 00:22:54.560] You can, you can you can coach your friends.
[00:22:54.560 --> 00:22:55.440] I was like, no, no, no, no, no.
[00:22:55.520 --> 00:22:57.200] I'm starting a business.
[00:22:57.240 --> 00:23:01.400] I want to, I want to figure out how to begin having sales conversations.
[00:22:59.840 --> 00:23:04.040] So it was like second and third-degree sort of relationships.
[00:23:04.280 --> 00:23:12.520] I did coach like one friend, but um, coaching friends is tricky, so because you're too invested as a friend, so it's like it's hard to manage the boundaries there.
[00:23:12.520 --> 00:23:19.320] But, um, but yeah, I really it was important to me to feel like I'm running a business, like I'm starting an actual business.
[00:23:19.320 --> 00:23:29.560] And so, um, so yeah, I had a handful of early clients, I made the packages and things like very doable for someone who's like working full-time, earning her certification, momming, you know.
[00:23:29.560 --> 00:23:32.440] And then I also contracted with my company.
[00:23:32.440 --> 00:23:39.880] Once I had given them my timeline to exit, I contracted with them for an extra month or two to help transition because I hired someone to replace me.
[00:23:40.200 --> 00:23:44.760] And so those two things kind of combined, helped me build that financial bridge out.
[00:23:45.000 --> 00:23:55.960] And I will tell you also, I mean, I think when you come into this knowing whatever business it is that you're trying to start, that like I want to start a business, which means I need to transact.
[00:23:56.360 --> 00:24:01.880] You start behaving like someone who transacts, who actually earns for the value that they provide.
[00:24:01.880 --> 00:24:08.840] And you will, you'll start getting after, you start getting really creative about how you can continue to get paid more and more.
[00:24:08.840 --> 00:24:21.640] And it also really emboldened me to continuously raise my rates, to continuously look for possibility models in the marketplace, to not look for the lowest common denominator, but to look for like, what is the, what is the highest possibility?
[00:24:21.640 --> 00:24:22.120] Yeah.
[00:24:22.120 --> 00:24:25.640] Because people will try to tell you, well, you're new, so you probably don't want to charge me.
[00:24:26.040 --> 00:24:26.360] No.
[00:24:26.680 --> 00:24:28.120] And you know, I don't believe in that.
[00:24:28.120 --> 00:24:30.520] I'm like, wait a second, you're not new to Earth.
[00:24:30.520 --> 00:24:30.920] Okay.
[00:24:31.400 --> 00:24:34.240] You're not new to being a grown-up professional, right?
[00:24:34.520 --> 00:24:35.000] Okay.
[00:24:35.000 --> 00:24:36.240] All those experimentalists.
[00:24:36.760 --> 00:24:37.400] Okay.
[00:24:37.400 --> 00:24:37.880] No.
[00:24:38.440 --> 00:24:38.920] Yeah.
[00:24:39.160 --> 00:24:39.560] No.
[00:24:39.880 --> 00:24:44.360] But you said so many things that I want to unpack for a second.
[00:24:44.360 --> 00:24:46.320] I love looking for possibility.
[00:24:46.320 --> 00:24:46.880] What did you say?
[00:24:44.760 --> 00:24:48.960] Looking for possibility models.
[00:24:44.840 --> 00:24:50.320] Possibility models.
[00:24:50.560 --> 00:24:52.320] What does that mean for you?
[00:24:52.320 --> 00:24:54.160] Okay, so I'm going to give you a quick story, right?
[00:24:54.160 --> 00:24:55.040] Yeah, yeah.
[00:24:55.040 --> 00:25:01.840] So when I first started my coaching business, a girlfriend of mine happened to have a friend or a mentor who told her about these other coaches.
[00:25:01.840 --> 00:25:10.320] And she was like, hey, these coaches, these two women coaches, they happen to be two white women, have this like coaching program that they're starting to kind of mentor coaches.
[00:25:10.320 --> 00:25:11.840] And I learned a little bit about it.
[00:25:12.000 --> 00:25:14.320] The group was called Women and Money.
[00:25:14.320 --> 00:25:14.800] Yes.
[00:25:14.800 --> 00:25:16.560] And I was like, oh, I like the sound of that.
[00:25:16.560 --> 00:25:19.440] So what are we going to go and learn?
[00:25:19.440 --> 00:25:32.800] And I also was very interested because these were, I mentioned their race on purpose because white women have different kinds of access typically and maybe a different way of thinking about charging and about networking and about, you know, sort of how you manage opportunities.
[00:25:32.800 --> 00:25:38.720] And so just being in their presence, it wasn't, they gave me tons of like frameworks and books to read and da da da da.
[00:25:38.800 --> 00:25:48.720] There was one book that was really helpful to me, but just being in their presence and hearing how they move and getting little moments of mentorship where it's like, how much are you about to pitch for that contract?
[00:25:48.720 --> 00:25:50.400] No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
[00:25:50.400 --> 00:25:51.760] Make that times five.
[00:25:51.760 --> 00:25:52.160] Yeah.
[00:25:52.160 --> 00:25:52.880] The starting.
[00:25:52.880 --> 00:25:56.560] So that, what it showed me was, you know, these are, these are also mothers.
[00:25:56.560 --> 00:25:59.440] These are also women who had left corporate.
[00:25:59.440 --> 00:26:01.040] These were like, I just needed to see them.
[00:26:01.040 --> 00:26:04.960] And then I also wanted to push, you know, what I thought could be possible.
[00:26:04.960 --> 00:26:13.120] So just putting myself in the presence of people who are doing in close proximity, doing what it is that I wanted to do and at the level that I wanted to do it at.
[00:26:13.920 --> 00:26:16.720] I just kind of had to keep pushing and I continue to do that.
[00:26:17.040 --> 00:26:24.640] I'm never going to stop pushing what making sure that I put myself in the presence of things that expand who I believe I can be.
[00:26:24.640 --> 00:26:24.960] Yes.
[00:26:24.960 --> 00:26:40.440] And you've, that's one of the ways I think you have influenced my life in that I am inspired by you to really not only resource myself, we'll talk about that, but also keep pushing in the area of training and coaching.
[00:26:40.440 --> 00:26:49.560] And okay, who is doing something in the realm of what I'm doing that I want to learn from and not being afraid to invest?
[00:26:50.360 --> 00:26:52.120] Let's talk about that.
[00:26:52.760 --> 00:26:57.800] How do you the investments, Monique?
[00:26:57.800 --> 00:26:59.160] The investments.
[00:26:59.480 --> 00:27:00.120] Yes.
[00:27:00.120 --> 00:27:03.320] Like everybody is five-figure this, five-figure that.
[00:27:03.320 --> 00:27:05.720] I mean, I got to do it one at a time.
[00:27:07.480 --> 00:27:08.440] We can pace these.
[00:27:08.440 --> 00:27:16.360] Things about your approach to pacing yourself and investing so that you are growing as a business owner.
[00:27:16.360 --> 00:27:17.160] Well, I'll tell you what.
[00:27:17.160 --> 00:27:20.920] One thing I actually have taken from you, Nikayla, you mentioned this on one of your podcasts.
[00:27:21.320 --> 00:27:28.200] Maybe you've done mentioned this several times, but I know I heard it at least once come from you when you were talking about just-in-time investments.
[00:27:28.760 --> 00:27:33.320] And that's something that I kind of hold with me as well, because it's not about doing everything all the time.
[00:27:33.320 --> 00:27:36.040] You can't, you know, I do that sometimes still.
[00:27:36.120 --> 00:27:36.520] I get caught.
[00:27:36.520 --> 00:27:38.360] I'm like, let me just go ahead and get this course too.
[00:27:38.680 --> 00:27:41.400] And then I don't have time to do this little course on top of that.
[00:27:41.560 --> 00:27:43.400] You can also meet incredible people, right?
[00:27:43.400 --> 00:27:44.200] Like, that's what I'm saying.
[00:27:44.200 --> 00:27:47.240] I'm like, ooh, Monique, save me a spot.
[00:27:47.240 --> 00:27:47.720] I'm coming.
[00:27:48.040 --> 00:27:49.160] Well, I'm coming.
[00:27:49.160 --> 00:27:52.040] But I got some just-in-time work that I need to do right now.
[00:27:52.520 --> 00:27:53.000] Yes.
[00:27:53.000 --> 00:27:53.480] Yes.
[00:27:53.480 --> 00:27:56.840] And just trusting that, you know, what's for you right now or what matters most.
[00:27:56.840 --> 00:27:58.760] Like our priorities have to be our priorities.
[00:27:58.760 --> 00:27:59.160] Right.
[00:27:59.960 --> 00:28:05.240] But I think it is about responding to when you see the resource that you know you need.
[00:28:05.240 --> 00:28:07.240] It's you're you've vetted it, right?
[00:28:07.240 --> 00:28:16.560] You've, you've, you've gotten good reviews or referrals from people that you trust, all the things that kind of like shore this up to be like, this is, this is a good place to be, or this is a good thing for me to invest in.
[00:28:17.040 --> 00:28:20.000] It's about listening to, is this, this is my priority.
[00:28:14.920 --> 00:28:21.440] I said this is my priority.
[00:28:21.760 --> 00:28:23.840] Why am I not acting like this is my priority?
[00:28:23.840 --> 00:28:26.640] And investing ahead, investing ahead.
[00:28:26.640 --> 00:28:36.080] That has and so I have in several seasons invested when I felt like I didn't air quote have it, meaning I put it on credit.
[00:28:36.080 --> 00:28:36.640] Yes.
[00:28:37.200 --> 00:28:37.920] Or at least a point.
[00:28:38.080 --> 00:28:40.640] I mean, you were just talking about credit last week.
[00:28:40.640 --> 00:28:45.920] So again, another honest conversation about how to smartly utilize credit.
[00:28:45.920 --> 00:28:46.320] Yes.
[00:28:46.320 --> 00:28:46.720] Yes.
[00:28:46.720 --> 00:28:54.960] I think, I mean, it's one thing to like leverage your credit for actually investing in yourself versus like, you know, things that maybe are completely depreciating or worthless as soon as you buy them.
[00:28:55.120 --> 00:28:56.400] You know, I got to be careful.
[00:28:56.800 --> 00:28:57.440] Be careful.
[00:28:57.520 --> 00:28:58.400] Got to be careful.
[00:28:58.400 --> 00:29:04.640] But I was like, again, this is when I invest, I always know that I'm placing a bet on myself and I'm clear on the priorities that I have for this season.
[00:29:04.640 --> 00:29:08.000] Like, you know what hurts the most or you know what you're most excited about.
[00:29:08.000 --> 00:29:12.960] Like those are the clear priorities as the needle movers in your life or in your business.
[00:29:12.960 --> 00:29:19.360] And so, yeah, there have been times when I've invested ahead like that and it has, it has always paid off.
[00:29:19.360 --> 00:29:20.640] You know what it is for me though?
[00:29:20.640 --> 00:29:23.920] I think it just activates urgency in me in a way.
[00:29:24.080 --> 00:29:25.040] I'm going to say that too.
[00:29:25.040 --> 00:29:28.560] It activates not only urgency, but commitment.
[00:29:28.560 --> 00:29:30.560] Like, yes, I am locked in.
[00:29:30.560 --> 00:29:31.280] I'm locked in.
[00:29:31.280 --> 00:29:32.560] I am locked in.
[00:29:32.560 --> 00:29:39.200] But I also have to add some caveats too, because if anyone's unclear, again, go back to the just-in-time.
[00:29:39.200 --> 00:29:43.440] Go back to like what is most important in your business right now.
[00:29:43.760 --> 00:29:52.000] So if you're feeling like, if it's still feeling like, oh, I don't know if this is worth it, perhaps it's because it's not a priority, right?
[00:29:52.240 --> 00:30:00.760] So if you're still feeling on the fence about things, I think that's, it's good to listen to that survival instinct in you as well, that gut check.
[00:30:00.760 --> 00:30:06.840] And, you know, remember, we're not saying to just because something's high ticket doesn't mean it's going to be valuable and good vets.
[00:29:59.920 --> 00:30:07.400] Business.
[00:30:07.960 --> 00:30:08.920] Vex.
[00:30:09.560 --> 00:30:14.760] And make sure it's what's really going to help you, really going to move the needle in your business.
[00:30:14.760 --> 00:30:17.560] Emphasis on your yes.
[00:30:17.800 --> 00:30:21.160] And I will also say, yeah, it's important to do that.
[00:30:21.400 --> 00:30:23.960] I mean, that's what we did when we went to school, right?
[00:30:23.960 --> 00:30:25.640] Unless you're on a school ride.
[00:30:26.040 --> 00:30:30.120] You invested ahead, you know, it's like this is not going to pay off for some years.
[00:30:30.120 --> 00:30:32.360] And it's a good chunk of money, you know?
[00:30:32.360 --> 00:30:33.320] But I know what this is.
[00:30:33.320 --> 00:30:36.440] I'm placing a bet on myself and what I'm going to do in this environment, in this space.
[00:30:36.440 --> 00:30:53.560] The other thing I just wanted to quickly say about investing in yourself in this way is that it's also, I think, really important to note that it's not just about there are lots of tools and strategies and things that can like create meaningful but still kind of incremental change in our businesses and in our work.
[00:30:54.040 --> 00:31:00.520] That sometimes I think we can get addicted to doing those things because they are like, they're acute, you know, solutions.
[00:31:00.520 --> 00:31:07.320] They create like quick wins and they do, you're moving forward, but it's like you're actually inching forward or getting like a yard or two.
[00:31:08.040 --> 00:31:15.480] When what might be beneath is what's keeping you from making the quantum leap, the big, you know, the actual shift.
[00:31:15.480 --> 00:31:17.800] Or it's like, actually, I'm not supposed to be on this football field.
[00:31:17.800 --> 00:31:19.400] Why am I even on this football field?
[00:31:19.400 --> 00:31:21.320] I'm supposed to be, I don't know, on a tennis court.
[00:31:21.320 --> 00:31:22.440] I'm just making stuff up.
[00:31:22.440 --> 00:31:31.400] But you'll never get to that if it's like, there's actually some internal stuff that's that is keeping me doing these little incremental things right now.
[00:31:31.480 --> 00:31:32.920] Is there a pattern here?
[00:31:32.920 --> 00:31:33.400] Yeah.
[00:31:33.800 --> 00:31:37.720] So it's hard to always see that, but just to bring some awareness to it.
[00:31:37.720 --> 00:31:38.440] Yeah.
[00:31:43.560 --> 00:31:48.080] And that's where coaching is also helpful because of being able, someone else is hearing you speak.
[00:31:48.320 --> 00:31:56.480] And so someone else can call you out on your thought process, whereas you're not going to really truly see your thought process because of your blind spot.
[00:31:56.480 --> 00:31:59.760] And that literally happened to me recently as well.
[00:32:00.240 --> 00:32:06.000] Because I was talking about the current challenges I'm facing in this season of my business.
[00:32:06.000 --> 00:32:17.760] And, you know, the person stopped me and said, you know, what you're saying is this and this, but what I'm actually hearing is you talk about unboxing and boxes.
[00:32:17.760 --> 00:32:27.280] And what I'm really hearing is there needs to be a dismantling of long-held beliefs in this next season.
[00:32:27.280 --> 00:32:42.320] And that's absolutely a space I'm in right now where I'm in this transitional phase where there are profound mindset shifts that need to happen in order for me to move past some of these barriers.
[00:32:42.320 --> 00:32:42.880] Yeah.
[00:32:43.200 --> 00:32:43.840] Yeah.
[00:32:43.840 --> 00:32:45.840] And those, that's, that's where the real work is.
[00:32:45.840 --> 00:32:47.920] And that's where you will get, you will get everything.
[00:32:48.000 --> 00:32:51.280] And you can't, you're not going to find that in a lesson per se.
[00:32:51.280 --> 00:32:56.240] In a, you know, you're not going to read my way through.
[00:32:56.240 --> 00:32:56.720] Yeah.
[00:32:56.880 --> 00:32:57.360] Exactly.
[00:32:57.360 --> 00:32:59.040] You're not going to podcast your way through it.
[00:32:59.040 --> 00:33:00.560] You're not going to read your way through it.
[00:33:00.720 --> 00:33:04.880] You might get some inspiration, some quick, you know, but you want to experience transformation.
[00:33:05.760 --> 00:33:06.240] Exactly.
[00:33:06.240 --> 00:33:07.200] Exactly.
[00:33:07.200 --> 00:33:07.680] Yeah.
[00:33:07.680 --> 00:33:09.760] This is why we need to work together, Monique.
[00:33:09.760 --> 00:33:10.320] But no.
[00:33:13.280 --> 00:33:18.000] Well, back to your steps to go out on your own.
[00:33:18.000 --> 00:33:21.120] So, you started the training, you started getting clients.
[00:33:21.120 --> 00:33:24.720] You were, you know, slowly raising your rates.
[00:33:24.680 --> 00:33:32.280] Um, at what point did you start to kind of systematize and regulate your business, so to speak?
[00:33:29.360 --> 00:33:36.920] Like, you knew how you're getting money and you could predict income and all those things?
[00:33:37.240 --> 00:33:39.080] Yeah, okay, so that's a multi-layered story.
[00:33:39.080 --> 00:33:44.120] But what I can say is, in that first year, I think I thought I had kind of gotten a little rhythm down, right?
[00:33:44.120 --> 00:33:49.400] My husband used to tease me because I had kind of like an in-person, events-based, network-based model.
[00:33:49.400 --> 00:33:54.440] I was like, if I go to certain spaces, I will, you know, pick up chicks, air quote.
[00:33:55.080 --> 00:33:57.240] He's like, you always get numbers from these women.
[00:33:57.240 --> 00:34:00.440] I'm like, you know, I'll be out here bagging the ladies, you know.
[00:34:00.440 --> 00:34:05.320] But I would just go and I would see who in the room is like sparking my interest.
[00:34:05.320 --> 00:34:08.040] I don't, I didn't necessarily go and research and like who's going to be there.
[00:34:08.040 --> 00:34:10.360] Like, I just, I was like, I don't need to do that at this stage of business.
[00:34:10.360 --> 00:34:12.040] I don't, I still don't really do that.
[00:34:12.040 --> 00:34:19.560] Um, and I would, I would pick up women and some of them would become friends, and some people would become referrals, some people become clients.
[00:34:19.560 --> 00:34:23.160] Um, but I was just like, I just need to keep meeting women, put myself out there.
[00:34:23.160 --> 00:34:25.720] And then I would do some different events and retreats and things like that as well.
[00:34:25.720 --> 00:34:28.280] So people could actually experience my coaching and facilitation.
[00:34:28.440 --> 00:34:33.080] Um, so I was like, okay, as long as I keep showing up in these spaces in person, that was like my like rhythm.
[00:34:33.160 --> 00:34:37.480] I was like, I'm good because I know that like I can experience a certain kind of conversion rate out of that over time.
[00:34:37.480 --> 00:34:38.120] Yeah.
[00:34:38.440 --> 00:34:43.320] Then 2020 and we were not in personing anywhere.
[00:34:43.320 --> 00:34:47.640] And so I had to about face, and that is one of those moments when I invested ahead, right?
[00:34:47.640 --> 00:34:52.120] When I was just like, okay, I absolutely have to figure out how to show up online.
[00:34:52.120 --> 00:34:59.720] And that's when I hired my amazing business coach, Teresha Hawk, who really helped me figure out that online model.
[00:34:59.720 --> 00:35:00.920] So I kind of restarted.
[00:35:00.920 --> 00:35:03.280] And I think that's just the experience of entrepreneurship, Brian.
[00:35:03.320 --> 00:35:08.280] It's like you feel like you get into a groove in a way, and then everything changes and you start all over again.
[00:35:08.280 --> 00:35:09.320] Everything changes.
[00:35:09.400 --> 00:35:10.440] You never have it figured out.
[00:35:10.600 --> 00:35:11.240] Oh my gosh.
[00:35:11.480 --> 00:35:13.160] First of all, Teresha is amazing.
[00:35:13.400 --> 00:35:13.720] Yeah.
[00:35:13.720 --> 00:35:15.280] She's been on the show way back.
[00:35:14.760 --> 00:35:16.640] I need to have her back in the chair.
[00:35:16.640 --> 00:35:18.800] But yeah, Darisha is amazing.
[00:35:14.840 --> 00:35:22.000] So kudos to you for choosing the right coach.
[00:35:22.480 --> 00:35:24.880] And then also, you're absolutely right.
[00:35:24.880 --> 00:35:32.240] I think that's part of my fundamental shift that's happening right now is no matter how many times it happens, you know, it's going to happen.
[00:35:32.240 --> 00:35:36.800] I think I was caught off guard by the current need for a lot to change.
[00:35:36.800 --> 00:35:38.800] I'm like, no, I don't want to start over.
[00:35:38.800 --> 00:35:40.800] Girl, I can't.
[00:35:40.800 --> 00:35:42.720] I literally have a lot going on right now.
[00:35:43.520 --> 00:35:44.800] Now is not the time.
[00:35:44.800 --> 00:35:47.600] Now it's not the time to start over.
[00:35:48.560 --> 00:35:50.000] Like, I got kids, a husband.
[00:35:50.000 --> 00:35:50.400] Like, what?
[00:35:51.600 --> 00:35:54.240] Girl, I have to figure out my business again.
[00:35:54.560 --> 00:36:00.800] But that's what happens, you know, like every several years, the market, everything's going to shift.
[00:36:01.200 --> 00:36:07.920] So I definitely was, I got a little too complacent and just forgot that this is just part of life in business.
[00:36:07.920 --> 00:36:08.320] Yeah.
[00:36:08.320 --> 00:36:14.240] And it's nice when a thing is working for a while, where it's just this is like locked in.
[00:36:14.240 --> 00:36:15.040] We know what we're doing.
[00:36:15.040 --> 00:36:17.200] We've got the systems that support the things.
[00:36:17.200 --> 00:36:17.520] Yeah.
[00:36:17.520 --> 00:36:19.440] But it's, you know, it's never forever.
[00:36:19.440 --> 00:36:20.800] It's never forever.
[00:36:20.800 --> 00:36:27.440] So yeah, I think I have had several seasons of that, or multiple seasons of that, where it was like I had a system that was locked in.
[00:36:27.440 --> 00:36:30.080] I kind of got the revenue moving in a certain way.
[00:36:30.080 --> 00:36:31.840] I knew what levers to pull.
[00:36:31.840 --> 00:36:33.120] And then I have to switch it up.
[00:36:33.120 --> 00:36:34.960] Then you have to switch it up.
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[00:39:28.880 --> 00:39:35.120] And you're unique in that you have done B2C, you know, business to customer, and also B2B, business to business.
[00:39:35.120 --> 00:39:38.240] You've been in-house with, again, you know, amazing firms.
[00:39:38.240 --> 00:39:49.920] Is this something you've done more recently after coaching from Jarisha, or did you start out like that with like, you know, I'm an in-house executive coach for this awesome Stanford business school and this other company?
[00:39:49.920 --> 00:39:50.400] Yeah.
[00:39:50.720 --> 00:39:53.040] So that was also a part of my bridgeway out.
[00:39:53.040 --> 00:39:59.680] So in that year, when I was transitioning out of my full-time role, I also, I was, you know, I was part-time at Stanford.
[00:39:59.680 --> 00:40:03.760] I would, so I, and I had my baby, so it was, it was a lot going on.
[00:40:04.080 --> 00:40:07.440] So I would work my days and then I would spend a little bit of time baby.
[00:40:07.440 --> 00:40:08.880] And then there was a multiple, multiple times a week.
[00:40:08.880 --> 00:40:16.000] I'd be driving down to Stanford to do work there at the business schools, facilitating and coaching in women's leadership circles, basically.
[00:40:16.320 --> 00:40:20.320] And then I would drive back, and then I would have like homework for my coaching certification.
[00:40:20.320 --> 00:40:21.920] So, I was figuring those things out.
[00:40:21.920 --> 00:40:27.040] So, that was just kind of a part of me, like building the network, building skills, building really confidence.
[00:40:27.040 --> 00:40:31.000] But, yet, my, I guess, portfolio-ish approach to building my business.
[00:40:29.680 --> 00:40:34.600] I've always known that I wanted to have some portion of my business.
[00:40:34.840 --> 00:40:39.960] I don't want to have all my eggs in one basket, some portion of my business that was B to B versus B to C.
[00:40:39.960 --> 00:40:42.600] Um, I prefer to have it's like an 80/20.
[00:40:42.680 --> 00:40:48.120] I prefer to have 80% of my business be B to C over B to B.
[00:40:48.120 --> 00:40:52.200] And when I say 10%, I think of it energy-wise because of my energy.
[00:40:52.200 --> 00:40:54.280] The energy, yes, yes.
[00:40:54.280 --> 00:41:00.280] Um, working with big companies, it takes a different it pulls on different energy levers for me, you know.
[00:41:00.520 --> 00:41:11.880] Um, you know, there's like just like the process of all things, just getting set up in the procurement, child, the approvals, and the things, you know, at my W-9 like four different times this week alone with a big company.
[00:41:11.880 --> 00:41:13.720] I'm like, what is going on?
[00:41:14.120 --> 00:41:14.760] Why?
[00:41:14.760 --> 00:41:17.080] Why don't your system process this?
[00:41:17.080 --> 00:41:18.280] So, I get it.
[00:41:18.280 --> 00:41:21.640] Yes, and it's those little things I just have less control over.
[00:41:21.640 --> 00:41:24.200] And freedom is a huge, huge value of mine.
[00:41:24.200 --> 00:41:26.120] So, that feels like it infringes on that.
[00:41:26.120 --> 00:41:27.720] I'm like, that's why I started my business.
[00:41:27.720 --> 00:41:28.840] I need to feel free.
[00:41:28.840 --> 00:41:41.080] So, so yeah, I'm doing because you're preaching to some of the beliefs that I need to work through, right?
[00:41:41.080 --> 00:41:47.240] Because I think what's been a struggle for me is right, I became an entrepreneur to, and y'all, I can't help it.
[00:41:47.240 --> 00:41:51.480] When I went, Monique, I can't help but you know, I just feel to get coaching.
[00:41:51.560 --> 00:41:53.960] Get into it, come on, get into it.
[00:41:53.960 --> 00:41:56.520] I love it, she's just so wise.
[00:41:56.520 --> 00:42:03.240] But so, no, but you just reminded me of what is one of my mental blocks right now, right?
[00:42:03.240 --> 00:42:07.640] I became an entrepreneur for control of my time and flexibility.
[00:42:07.640 --> 00:42:19.680] So, my fear, I guess, in doing B2B, which for a long time, you know, people have suggested business mentors have suggested, I was afraid of losing my time again.
[00:42:19.680 --> 00:42:22.560] It's almost like PTSD from working in corporate.
[00:42:22.560 --> 00:42:27.920] Like, oh my gosh, now are they going to want me to come in the office more, like to facilitate stuff?
[00:42:27.920 --> 00:42:30.000] Like, how is this going to work?
[00:42:30.000 --> 00:42:30.640] Right.
[00:42:30.960 --> 00:42:34.000] So that's something I need to work through.
[00:42:34.320 --> 00:42:34.800] Yeah.
[00:42:34.800 --> 00:42:39.360] So the decision to whether or not to give more of your time to the B2B work?
[00:42:39.760 --> 00:42:46.320] I guess, number one, stop imagining things that before it's an actual obstacle.
[00:42:46.320 --> 00:42:48.240] Like this is something I'm making up in my mind, right?
[00:42:48.240 --> 00:42:52.000] I don't even know what company it would be if they would need me in-house.
[00:42:52.160 --> 00:42:54.080] Maybe if it would just be once a month, right?
[00:42:54.080 --> 00:43:12.560] Like, so one, I'm creating a problem, and two, just opening myself to the possibilities, as you said, to kind of just unblock this area of my brain that's making me fear B2B because I know there's opportunity there and there's need there for my skill set.
[00:43:12.560 --> 00:43:16.800] So yeah, I had a conversation with a client that feels like connects.
[00:43:16.800 --> 00:43:18.160] Can I go into this really quickly with you?
[00:43:18.160 --> 00:43:18.640] Oh, yeah.
[00:43:18.640 --> 00:43:19.200] Oh, yeah.
[00:43:19.200 --> 00:43:23.040] And I hope I'm not hijacking y'all, but I just, it just triggered well.
[00:43:23.040 --> 00:43:30.240] This is also, I am positive that somebody listening right now, that probably a lot of y'all listening right now are going to connect to this experience too, because this is what happens.
[00:43:30.480 --> 00:43:57.520] I think, especially when you come from a marginalized community, I work mostly with women of color, but that PTSD experience, like pain drives a lot of our decisions or fear of experiencing pain because we know what it feels like to be, you know, to have control, you know, messed with, we'll say, I don't have to say taken away, but, you know, messed with, and what that, you know, what that does for our health, our psyche, and that sort of a thing.
[00:43:57.520 --> 00:44:12.440] And so when we enter into moments where it's like, okay, I've got a decision to make here to step into a new way or a new thing that I want to do, the first thing that can come up is like all the things that I might lose, all the scary things that might happen to me.
[00:44:12.440 --> 00:44:15.800] And it becomes really, really irrational, which I'm sure you're aware of, right?
[00:44:17.400 --> 00:44:21.560] But it's like you can be, you can be logically aware, but emotionally still stuck, you know?
[00:44:22.040 --> 00:44:24.280] That's just how our brains and our bodies work.
[00:44:24.280 --> 00:44:25.160] That's just what it is.
[00:44:25.160 --> 00:44:35.480] And so it's like, okay, how can I begin to like provide myself with some fodder to release some of the irrational attachment to like something bad is going to happen to me?
[00:44:35.880 --> 00:44:39.720] And then really the language happened to me is really, really, really important.
[00:44:39.720 --> 00:44:41.960] So for instance, I was talking to a client.
[00:44:42.280 --> 00:44:49.720] She's very, very accomplished, very, very senior, and she is looking for her multi-eight figure opportunity.
[00:44:50.200 --> 00:44:53.400] She's being courted and she's terrified.
[00:44:54.360 --> 00:44:56.520] What she knows is kind of like, what is going on?
[00:44:56.520 --> 00:45:00.520] Like, this is, it's not like I'm scared, I can't have it because I'm looking for it and nothing.
[00:45:00.760 --> 00:45:05.000] It's like people are approaching her saying, hey, you want this bag of money?
[00:45:05.000 --> 00:45:11.320] And she's like, but the first thoughts that come to mind are things like, you know, but what if I lose it all?
[00:45:11.320 --> 00:45:12.200] I've got kids.
[00:45:12.200 --> 00:45:14.280] You know, I got to put them through school.
[00:45:14.520 --> 00:45:16.440] You know, this and this happened with my family.
[00:45:16.440 --> 00:45:20.120] I've seen bad things, you know, like, and it's like none of these things are actually happening.
[00:45:20.120 --> 00:45:26.360] None of this, like you said, sort of you project out, you start like, you know, trying to, you know, predict the worst case scenario.
[00:45:26.920 --> 00:45:29.400] Yes, catastrophizing your butt off.
[00:45:29.400 --> 00:45:40.200] And what we came to, and I hope this is also helpful to you, Nikayla, as you're thinking about this too, is that you have standards and you have criteria that must be met.
[00:45:40.200 --> 00:45:45.440] All you have to do is identify what those standards and criteria are and assert them.
[00:45:44.760 --> 00:45:46.560] Say them out loud.
[00:45:46.880 --> 00:45:57.680] So, if it's like, for me, a multi-eight-figure, whatever opportunity needs to look like X, Y, and Z, or whatever the list of things are, then those are the only conversations you're having.
[00:45:57.680 --> 00:45:58.720] And you can say those things.
[00:45:58.720 --> 00:46:01.760] You're allowed to say those things in the conversations that you're having.
[00:46:01.760 --> 00:46:09.680] We believe that opportunities are so scarce or that these things will go away if we say what we want.
[00:46:10.000 --> 00:46:11.200] It can't be further from the truth.
[00:46:11.200 --> 00:46:12.640] It's actually very attractive.
[00:46:12.640 --> 00:46:16.000] And sometimes things will be repelled, but usually it's things that need to be repelled.
[00:46:16.000 --> 00:46:16.640] Right, right, right.
[00:46:17.200 --> 00:46:18.640] You didn't need that in the first place.
[00:46:18.640 --> 00:46:21.200] So, giving yourself a moment, no, it wasn't for you.
[00:46:21.200 --> 00:46:25.440] So, giving yourself a moment to identify: well, I have criteria, I have standards.
[00:46:25.440 --> 00:46:27.600] It's like, okay, these are what the hours need to look like.
[00:46:27.600 --> 00:46:29.200] These are what the commitments need to look like.
[00:46:29.600 --> 00:46:30.480] This is what I'm willing to do.
[00:46:30.480 --> 00:46:31.840] This is not what I'm willing to do.
[00:46:31.840 --> 00:46:38.400] And I know this from personal experience too, because I've had, you know, shaking in my boots, have conversations with these huge companies and tell them, no, I don't do this.
[00:46:38.400 --> 00:46:39.520] This is what it will look like.
[00:46:39.520 --> 00:46:40.480] This is what I need.
[00:46:40.480 --> 00:46:44.800] And you can find little opportunities for a compromise, but you keep it minimal.
[00:46:44.800 --> 00:46:45.360] Yes.
[00:46:45.760 --> 00:46:48.240] You're in control still over those things and you can walk away.
[00:46:49.520 --> 00:46:51.360] That was so powerful.
[00:46:51.360 --> 00:46:52.240] Yes.
[00:46:52.560 --> 00:46:54.480] I definitely needed to hear that.
[00:46:54.480 --> 00:46:56.000] And you know what that reminded me of?
[00:46:56.000 --> 00:47:07.440] Again, your background and having that early exposure to these executives, because I too have seen people who they were being courted for C-suite roles, and it was like the negotiations were at a standstill.
[00:47:07.440 --> 00:47:11.120] And it would be like, oh, they need their two personal assistants to come with them.
[00:47:11.120 --> 00:47:12.400] They need this, this, and that.
[00:47:12.400 --> 00:47:12.640] Girl.
[00:47:12.800 --> 00:47:14.320] They're like, okay, okay, okay.
[00:47:14.320 --> 00:47:16.480] They're just giving all the concessions.
[00:47:16.480 --> 00:47:17.120] Yes.
[00:47:17.120 --> 00:47:18.560] You know, I've seen it done.
[00:47:18.560 --> 00:47:20.160] You've seen it done too.
[00:47:20.160 --> 00:47:20.640] Yeah.
[00:47:20.640 --> 00:47:24.960] And at a certain level of expertise, it's like, Nikayla, this is a one-of-one podcast.
[00:47:24.960 --> 00:47:26.400] You're a one-of-one kind of girl.
[00:47:26.400 --> 00:47:29.760] You know, there is no other side hustle pro equivalent out there.
[00:47:30.040 --> 00:47:33.800] So, if somebody wants you and the value you bring, okay, where are you gonna go shop for it?
[00:47:33.800 --> 00:47:42.520] Go ahead, you know, it's like when you've been doing putting on a decade's worth of effort and expertise has been built up.
[00:47:42.760 --> 00:47:46.840] So, your value is so unique that you can rest in that.
[00:47:46.840 --> 00:47:49.320] You get to rest in the expertise you've built.
[00:47:49.320 --> 00:47:53.000] Thank you, thank you for that, and just thank you for being you again.
[00:47:53.000 --> 00:47:55.080] I hope y'all are soaking in this wisdom.
[00:47:55.080 --> 00:48:02.200] I hope that you, after this conversation, will definitely go over to MoniqueRShields.com and add yourself to that wait list.
[00:48:02.200 --> 00:48:07.560] All right, again, if you're not ready to invest ahead, add yourself to the email list, okay?
[00:48:07.560 --> 00:48:10.520] Because even the emails, bless me, Monique.
[00:48:10.520 --> 00:48:15.480] All right, come on, there's no chat GPT in there.
[00:48:15.480 --> 00:48:23.640] That is you, you can tell, English waiter.
[00:48:24.680 --> 00:48:30.760] Let's talk about your newest initiative, like your newest program that you're launching for moms or that you've launched.
[00:48:31.240 --> 00:48:34.840] Your ex-cohort is locked in for the next six months.
[00:48:34.840 --> 00:48:35.800] Um, tell us about it.
[00:48:35.800 --> 00:48:38.120] What's it called, and what is it?
[00:48:38.120 --> 00:48:47.800] Okay, so I came into this year, um, into full transparency post-election, feeling very, very clear that gathering women and prioritizing black women.
[00:48:47.800 --> 00:48:52.440] And I love my black mamas was of the utmost importance.
[00:48:52.440 --> 00:48:53.720] It's an imperative for me this year.
[00:48:53.720 --> 00:48:58.920] So, any ways that I can bring us together with intention, um, that's what I want to do this year.
[00:48:58.920 --> 00:49:29.840] And so, I created this group called Claimed, um, and it is for highly accomplished black mothers who are ready to open up their next chapter, but want to do it in a way where they're not compromising themselves, want to do it in a way where they can feel like we talk about release some of those PTSD attachments to old professional identities or old beliefs and that sort of a thing and move through and actually grab on to what's next, allow themselves to create what's going to come next that's even better than where they are now.
[00:49:30.160 --> 00:49:33.920] So yeah, it's a group about dreaming, it's a group about doing, it's a group about being.
[00:49:33.920 --> 00:49:36.720] And I'm really, really, really excited about the cohort that's come together.
[00:49:36.720 --> 00:49:45.600] Enrollment is closed for this cohort, but it's something that I think I'll, I think, I don't want to make any promises, y'all, but I want to do a special thing for black mothers every year.
[00:49:45.600 --> 00:49:46.960] I think I'm going to make this an annual thing.
[00:49:46.960 --> 00:49:47.280] We'll see.
[00:49:47.280 --> 00:49:49.040] So, you know, we'll take one year at a time.
[00:49:49.440 --> 00:49:51.600] But I'm really proud of it.
[00:49:51.600 --> 00:49:52.000] Yeah.
[00:49:52.000 --> 00:49:52.320] Yeah.
[00:49:52.320 --> 00:49:52.720] And we'll see.
[00:49:52.720 --> 00:49:59.440] I think I might do also a group that's not specific to mothers because I got a lot of questions like, what about kids?
[00:49:59.600 --> 00:50:03.120] I don't have to kid or you know, like, you can't do anything for it for identity.
[00:50:03.360 --> 00:50:11.360] And I'm like, I mean, let's talk about the people who, yeah, like, does this society even allow for people to become mothers, right?
[00:50:11.680 --> 00:50:18.640] You know, like, there's so many ambitious people who can they even take a pause to focus on that area.
[00:50:18.640 --> 00:50:23.680] So I know, I know your, your, your inbox was full of people like, what about me?
[00:50:25.200 --> 00:50:27.760] Yeah, it really is.
[00:50:27.760 --> 00:50:36.640] And yeah, whether you have wanted to become a mom or just have chosen not to or whatever the situation is, like, I think I'm for all of us, okay?
[00:50:36.640 --> 00:50:39.280] I am women of color broadly.
[00:50:39.280 --> 00:50:44.080] That's, that's, y'all are in my heart with um at the core of everything I create.
[00:50:44.080 --> 00:50:47.760] So, so yeah, that's that's what I'm about this year, and I'm really excited about it.
[00:50:48.560 --> 00:50:50.360] And you know, you're also an example.
[00:50:50.360 --> 00:51:01.800] Something that I also enjoy about you is you're an example of speaking of business evolving in creating new offerings and not being stuck in this box.
[00:51:01.800 --> 00:51:05.160] Don't put yourself in a box of, oh, this is what I offer.
[00:50:59.840 --> 00:51:06.920] And I can't create something new.
[00:51:07.080 --> 00:51:08.760] It will look weird or whatever.
[00:51:08.760 --> 00:51:15.800] Like, no, as you evolve and you see a new need, you have been one that has tested out different offerings.
[00:51:15.800 --> 00:51:19.640] So, how do you go about deciding what I'll offer when?
[00:51:19.640 --> 00:51:21.160] And as you think ahead, right?
[00:51:21.160 --> 00:51:22.840] Because I know you don't just plan in the moment.
[00:51:22.840 --> 00:51:24.760] You have to think ahead for your next year.
[00:51:25.080 --> 00:51:26.760] Yeah, I think about things for a while.
[00:51:26.760 --> 00:51:27.720] Sometimes too long, y'all.
[00:51:27.720 --> 00:51:28.280] I'm gonna be honest.
[00:51:28.920 --> 00:51:30.360] How are you getting your head about stuff?
[00:51:30.440 --> 00:51:32.440] But I really want things to feel right.
[00:51:32.920 --> 00:51:36.120] And so, yeah, my process looks like number one, listening.
[00:51:36.440 --> 00:51:48.520] Your market will tell you, and that's why it's so important to be visible and verbal, you know, vocal about what it is that you're doing because your audience, even if there are five people listening to you, they will tell you what they need.
[00:51:48.840 --> 00:51:51.560] And then all you got to do is show up and give them what they want or need.
[00:51:51.560 --> 00:51:52.360] That aligns for you.
[00:51:52.360 --> 00:51:54.360] You don't need to be doing stuff that you can't stand.
[00:51:54.360 --> 00:51:56.760] But, you know, so you find that intersection.
[00:51:56.760 --> 00:51:59.160] You just listen and they'll tell you what you need.
[00:51:59.160 --> 00:52:01.480] And then for me, I also just kind of like to test the waters.
[00:52:01.480 --> 00:52:03.400] I'm like, okay, I think I'm getting this signal.
[00:52:03.400 --> 00:52:04.440] I'm getting DMs.
[00:52:04.440 --> 00:52:06.520] People have asked me literally over the last two years.
[00:52:06.600 --> 00:52:07.800] I haven't done a group program.
[00:52:07.800 --> 00:52:09.560] I guess even three or so years.
[00:52:09.560 --> 00:52:11.000] I haven't done one in a while.
[00:52:11.000 --> 00:52:11.880] I've asked you.
[00:52:11.960 --> 00:52:13.480] Heaven asked me.
[00:52:13.480 --> 00:52:14.520] I was like, that was bigger.
[00:52:14.840 --> 00:52:16.040] I was one of them.
[00:52:16.040 --> 00:52:16.920] Help me.
[00:52:16.920 --> 00:52:18.600] It's like the Kevin Hart voice.
[00:52:18.600 --> 00:52:19.080] Help me.
[00:52:19.080 --> 00:52:20.040] Help me.
[00:52:23.160 --> 00:52:24.120] So I was with him.
[00:52:24.120 --> 00:52:25.560] Some help me, please.
[00:52:25.560 --> 00:52:26.760] Around this group thing.
[00:52:26.760 --> 00:52:28.120] And I was like, okay, let me see.
[00:52:28.120 --> 00:52:30.360] And then I just started feeling like I want it to be for moms.
[00:52:30.360 --> 00:52:32.280] I really want it to be for moms.
[00:52:32.840 --> 00:52:37.160] And so I, yeah, I remember I would put it like in like the PPS of my newsletter.
[00:52:37.240 --> 00:52:38.520] Like, I'm thinking about this thing.
[00:52:38.520 --> 00:52:38.760] Y'all.
[00:52:38.800 --> 00:52:39.400] Anybody interested?
[00:52:39.400 --> 00:52:40.680] And a bunch of people just raised their hand.
[00:52:40.760 --> 00:52:42.440] I was like, okay, there really is interest.
[00:52:42.440 --> 00:52:43.720] I'm not making this up.
[00:52:43.720 --> 00:52:47.360] So I kind of try to grow my data set to have confidence around the signal.
[00:52:47.360 --> 00:52:48.800] And then I just get to building.
[00:52:44.840 --> 00:52:51.600] And, you know, it's like anything else that you build when you build a new offer.
[00:52:51.760 --> 00:53:01.840] You can, I listen as I go, even as I'm interviewing and talking to people from their applications, understanding what it is that they really want, what it is that they're really struggling with.
[00:53:01.840 --> 00:53:09.360] And yeah, the things it's crazy sometimes I think about it's wild, but they build themselves if you just listen and respond.
[00:53:15.120 --> 00:53:18.080] Yes, yes, that is absolutely accurate.
[00:53:18.080 --> 00:53:24.080] And speaking of listening, you have a podcast, Ambition Without Compromise.
[00:53:24.400 --> 00:53:30.480] At what stage in the game did you start your podcast and why did you start it?
[00:53:30.800 --> 00:53:35.440] Okay, so I've had my business six and a half years.
[00:53:35.440 --> 00:53:38.320] I started my podcast two and a half years ago, I think.
[00:53:38.320 --> 00:53:40.240] So like 20, something like that.
[00:53:40.240 --> 00:53:40.720] Yes.
[00:53:40.720 --> 00:53:41.200] Yes.
[00:53:41.200 --> 00:53:45.520] Because I had my son at the end of 2022 and I started beginning to prep to have my podcast.
[00:53:45.520 --> 00:53:47.280] Yes, in spring of 2023.
[00:53:47.280 --> 00:53:50.880] So yeah, what prompted that was, well, really two things.
[00:53:50.880 --> 00:53:54.720] One was about I always kind of count my experience first.
[00:53:54.720 --> 00:53:58.080] So I mean, I'm the person who has to do this thing.
[00:53:58.080 --> 00:53:59.920] I need to feel a certain way doing it.
[00:54:00.320 --> 00:54:04.000] I won't do things that completely like I don't do anything that destabilizes my energy.
[00:54:04.000 --> 00:54:07.760] I don't do things because it that messes up the big play.
[00:54:07.760 --> 00:54:12.960] You know, we got to think about the big play, you know, especially at my grown age with these children.
[00:54:12.960 --> 00:54:15.440] Yes, I need to make sure I'm less energy.
[00:54:15.440 --> 00:54:18.480] Okay, I can't be doing other stuff to destabilize.
[00:54:18.800 --> 00:54:19.520] That's enough.
[00:54:19.520 --> 00:54:24.320] One thing that destabilizes energy one at a time.
[00:54:24.320 --> 00:54:26.000] And they're not going to quit.
[00:54:26.000 --> 00:54:29.520] So, so yes, I'm really, really cognizant of that.
[00:54:29.520 --> 00:54:31.000] And so, I tested for a while.
[00:54:29.760 --> 00:54:34.600] I used to have this thing called my letters from Monique, it was an audio newsletter.
[00:54:29.840 --> 00:54:35.400] And it was my way.
[00:54:35.560 --> 00:54:41.880] When I first started the business, I was like, okay, I want, I don't know this email marketing thing, but I was like, I kind of feel like I want to have a way where I'm in some people's inbox.
[00:54:41.880 --> 00:54:43.480] My list has been tiny around it.
[00:54:43.480 --> 00:54:46.360] You know, I just kind of like put something out there just to build the muscle.
[00:54:46.360 --> 00:54:53.800] But I was like, if I can prove to myself that I can do one audio a month for a year while I'm doing all these other things in my business or whatever, then we'll see if we go up from there.
[00:54:53.800 --> 00:54:55.160] So that was kind of my experiment.
[00:54:55.160 --> 00:54:56.040] I proved it to myself.
[00:54:56.040 --> 00:54:56.680] I liked it.
[00:54:56.680 --> 00:54:57.640] I felt good in it.
[00:54:57.640 --> 00:55:01.960] And then I did some customer interviews with some of my favorite clients and women in my network.
[00:55:01.960 --> 00:55:05.800] And one of the questions I asked was, Where do you consume?
[00:55:06.360 --> 00:55:09.160] What are you watching, listening to, reading?
[00:55:09.480 --> 00:55:11.480] And my girly is a podcast girly.
[00:55:11.560 --> 00:55:19.080] Most of my clients and women and you know, my ideal sort of targeted woman, she likes podcasts because she's a multitasker.
[00:55:19.080 --> 00:55:23.560] So she can listen to her podcast while she's walking or cleaning or driving.
[00:55:23.560 --> 00:55:24.680] So I was like, okay, it's clear.
[00:55:24.680 --> 00:55:25.960] I need to do this podcast thing.
[00:55:25.960 --> 00:55:27.400] I want to meet her where she is.
[00:55:27.400 --> 00:55:30.600] And I've actually given myself that time to see that I enjoyed it.
[00:55:30.600 --> 00:55:35.960] So I said a nice, ease, full frequency bi-weekly, every other Wednesday, and it's been wonderful.
[00:55:35.960 --> 00:55:36.760] Nice.
[00:55:36.760 --> 00:55:40.360] And speaking of gifts, that is also another one of your gifts.
[00:55:40.360 --> 00:55:43.960] I think you have one of the most peaceful, calming voices.
[00:55:43.960 --> 00:55:52.520] And for me, as you know, someone who falls into your target audience, it's like I'm listening to a girlfriend, a coach as I'm driving or what have you.
[00:55:52.520 --> 00:55:57.240] So it's like I'm having a conversation with someone I would want to talk to anyway.
[00:55:57.240 --> 00:56:11.240] And so, yeah, if you, if you have a podcast audio, like if the people who you want to target are listeners, our watchers, which honestly, I think most people are these days, then it's something, it's something to consider for sure.
[00:56:11.560 --> 00:56:17.520] But it was really interesting when we worked together because you said something that was very unique.
[00:56:14.840 --> 00:56:21.200] You're like, listen, my focus is not on growing the show.
[00:56:21.520 --> 00:56:33.840] My focus is on deepening the message, clarifying the message, and really getting clear on what this person needs to hear and the topics and the how.
[00:56:33.840 --> 00:56:36.480] Like, tell me, tell us a little bit more about that.
[00:56:36.480 --> 00:56:47.600] Like, why was it more important to you about the content and not so much the growing the audience and becoming like this big podcast Instagram TikTok sensation?
[00:56:50.800 --> 00:56:52.400] Well, I think there's a few things there.
[00:56:52.400 --> 00:57:00.320] So, when I first started the podcast, my intention for that entire year, not even just the podcast, but for everything, it was again, I had just had my second baby.
[00:57:00.320 --> 00:57:02.400] And I was like, this year is about depth.
[00:57:02.400 --> 00:57:03.440] It's not about breadth.
[00:57:03.440 --> 00:57:04.240] It's about depth.
[00:57:04.240 --> 00:57:05.600] So, I want to do very few things.
[00:57:05.600 --> 00:57:07.280] I want to do them very well.
[00:57:07.520 --> 00:57:08.240] So, there was that.
[00:57:08.240 --> 00:57:10.560] So, that's just the energy with which I started the podcast.
[00:57:10.560 --> 00:57:21.200] Then, by the time you and I start working together, my podcast coach, VIP coaching with Nikayla, first of all, if you're not on her wait list, she's got the keys to the kingdom, just to be clear.
[00:57:21.200 --> 00:57:25.840] So, which was so, so, so helpful getting your feedback because you're obviously a killer in the game.
[00:57:25.840 --> 00:57:32.960] So, yeah, but me just sort of discovering also at that time, I was like, oh, where my business is at right now, I'm not in a growth stage.
[00:57:32.960 --> 00:57:37.280] I'm like, I, I, for who I'm speaking to, which is like, I'm not for everyone.
[00:57:37.280 --> 00:57:42.320] I'm, you know, like you're women of a, uh, of certain at a certain stage in your career and life.
[00:57:42.320 --> 00:57:44.240] There are certain variables that have to come together.
[00:57:44.240 --> 00:57:47.360] That's not a, it's not a mass market message necessarily.
[00:57:47.360 --> 00:57:53.040] I think I could see it growing in the future, but I was like, before where I'm at right now, I want to like be super clear.
[00:57:53.040 --> 00:57:54.640] I'm calling in her.
[00:57:54.640 --> 00:57:56.640] Like, I want, I want my market to be tight.
[00:57:56.640 --> 00:58:05.160] I would love in the future to be able to position this to sponsor as just saying, I have this super tight niche group, and I know I've got them all.
[00:57:59.840 --> 00:58:05.960] They're all here.
[00:58:06.600 --> 00:58:10.040] You know, it's not huge, but it's tight and it's crisp.
[00:58:10.040 --> 00:58:12.680] And so, um, so I was just really clear on that.
[00:58:12.680 --> 00:58:15.880] And I also just the activities that are involved and really, really growing.
[00:58:16.040 --> 00:58:22.920] That was one of the beautiful things also about working with you was understanding somebody from somebody who has a huge podcast and a large following.
[00:58:22.920 --> 00:58:26.760] You know, what are all the different levers you pull, the different work streams?
[00:58:26.760 --> 00:58:34.440] And I was like, I think to do that well, to do it at a Nikayla level, I would have to have my business a lot more focused on the podcast, meaning my daily activities.
[00:58:34.440 --> 00:58:36.680] And it's like, I'm not ready to make that pivot.
[00:58:36.680 --> 00:58:42.200] So, so yeah, it was like a capacity, a season thing, like ideal client thing.
[00:58:42.200 --> 00:58:42.680] Yeah.
[00:58:42.680 --> 00:58:48.840] And I think you do such an excellent job of, like you said, owning that of, okay, here's what I want this to look like.
[00:58:48.840 --> 00:58:51.240] Here's how much energy I want this to occupy.
[00:58:51.240 --> 00:58:54.920] And here's how I want to do it well in this energy space.
[00:58:54.920 --> 00:58:59.880] Like I recognize what that would look like, but that's not what I want for me right now or maybe ever.
[00:59:00.040 --> 00:59:01.000] But this is what I want.
[00:59:01.000 --> 00:59:03.640] And here's how I want to do it well here.
[00:59:03.640 --> 00:59:04.360] Totally.
[00:59:04.680 --> 00:59:06.440] I try to respond to my seasons.
[00:59:06.440 --> 00:59:09.080] Like I really, really, really try to do that.
[00:59:09.400 --> 00:59:11.480] Not perfect at it, but it's really important to me.
[00:59:11.480 --> 00:59:11.880] And that's it.
[00:59:11.880 --> 00:59:12.200] It is.
[00:59:12.200 --> 00:59:14.440] I might change my mind like a couple of years from now or next year.
[00:59:14.440 --> 00:59:14.760] Who knows?
[00:59:14.760 --> 00:59:17.640] I might be like, Nikayla, how do I grow this thing to something massive?
[00:59:18.920 --> 00:59:36.680] No, I think we kind of have that similarity in it's almost like when you are in the space of having people apply to work with you, you truly are able to be selective and match energy and make sure energy is aligned when you get on calls.
[00:59:36.680 --> 00:59:42.440] And, you know, from the jump, I could just tell that one, like, I'm a fan of yours, right?
[00:59:42.440 --> 00:59:47.920] Like, I listen to your podcast in earnest and I get so much from it.
[00:59:47.920 --> 00:59:49.600] You see me share it in my own newsletter.
[00:59:49.600 --> 00:59:52.320] You're so great to you.
[00:59:52.640 --> 01:00:02.960] So, but again, I just think that is alignment and really understanding who we would who we would work with the best.
[01:00:02.960 --> 01:00:06.720] Did you ever have any experience where that was kind of hard for you at first starting out?
[01:00:06.720 --> 01:00:10.800] Like, understanding how to select clients?
[01:00:10.800 --> 01:00:11.840] I think, I think so.
[01:00:11.840 --> 01:00:15.920] I think that's like with anything, you know, where it's just like, I don't, I've always had wonderful clients.
[01:00:15.920 --> 01:00:19.200] I don't think I've ever had an experience where it's like, whoa, that was not good.
[01:00:19.520 --> 01:00:20.480] That was bad.
[01:00:20.880 --> 01:00:21.680] I don't add again.
[01:00:22.080 --> 01:00:22.400] Right.
[01:00:22.400 --> 01:00:35.120] I haven't, I haven't had quite that, but I definitely have where it's just like, oh, you're like adjacent, you know, like this is like a, you're like, but you learned, you only learn by doing, you only learned by experiencing different people.
[01:00:35.120 --> 01:00:41.920] And also who I served, you know, two years ago, two years prior to that, two, you know, like all of that continues to evolve.
[01:00:41.920 --> 01:00:48.560] So as my business evolves, as I evolve, as my skills and all of that evolves, so does my client.
[01:00:48.560 --> 01:00:52.080] And so I'm constantly relearning her as well.
[01:00:52.480 --> 01:00:55.200] And so I have to like continue, like even with claimed, right?
[01:00:55.200 --> 01:00:59.440] I had to like, okay, I have to get really tight on who she is.
[01:00:59.440 --> 01:01:02.240] And that's been also the benefit of working with coaches as well.
[01:01:02.640 --> 01:01:03.920] Sometimes it's hard to see it yourself.
[01:01:03.920 --> 01:01:05.200] You don't see the water swimming in.
[01:01:05.200 --> 01:01:06.800] You're like, girl, she's right there.
[01:01:06.800 --> 01:01:07.440] This is your girl.
[01:01:07.440 --> 01:01:08.320] This is what she's saying.
[01:01:09.280 --> 01:01:18.120] Even as a coach, like I'm very impressed by how you have a million, no, I will say a million, but you have you get some coaching, girl?
[01:01:18.440 --> 01:01:19.680] You're a health coach, a money coach.
[01:01:20.240 --> 01:01:20.640] Yes.
[01:01:20.640 --> 01:01:23.200] I didn't even know these kinds of coaches existed.
[01:01:23.200 --> 01:01:36.520] But no, that again has inspired me to step it up, you know, just in time or when the times are right, not trying to do everything at once because that would not be going along with your ethos of protecting our energy either.
[01:01:36.840 --> 01:01:44.200] But I'm really inspired by how you are very intentional about your coaching and also resourcing yourself.
[01:01:44.200 --> 01:01:46.520] Can you talk a little bit about that?
[01:01:46.520 --> 01:01:50.360] Yes, that is core to my message because we are moving around out here.
[01:01:50.360 --> 01:01:54.680] And so much of what ails us and what is keeping us stuck and what feels hard is the fact that we're alone.
[01:01:54.680 --> 01:02:00.120] My clients, one of the top, you asked me earlier, like, you know, sort of what it is that I see executive coaching being.
[01:02:00.120 --> 01:02:04.440] And I was kind of talking about it a little bit, but it's really like I'm a solution to isolation.
[01:02:04.440 --> 01:02:24.680] You know, when you are super high achieving and you're operating in spaces where, you know, professionally, like there's that element of having to be on and all that all the time, but also personally, if you are the one in your family who's like, I'm the rock, or I'm the one that made it out, or I'm the one who's got it together, or I'm the one that, you know, then you're all to worry about.
[01:02:24.680 --> 01:02:27.640] Yes, I'm the one that I'm your strong friend, you know.
[01:02:27.640 --> 01:02:32.920] So when you occupy that identity as well, it's like, where do you go to get to set that down?
[01:02:33.240 --> 01:02:39.320] You, it's like you might have people who love you and you know that, but it's like they don't, they, they're not fully, they can't fully relate.
[01:02:39.320 --> 01:02:50.040] They can't give me the full spectrum support that I really need, or I can't, I can't talk to them about my million dollar problems and stuff because it sounds ungrateful or it sounds, you know, awkward.
[01:02:50.040 --> 01:02:52.440] So, so yeah.
[01:02:52.440 --> 01:03:03.800] When it comes to resourcing yourself, you had a whole episode about that, how you are very intentional about the resources you need to for self-preservation, really.
[01:03:03.800 --> 01:03:09.000] Because if you are burnt out and stretched thin, nobody wins.
[01:03:09.000 --> 01:03:10.760] So, how did you approach that?
[01:03:10.760 --> 01:03:13.480] How do you approach that in your life?
[01:03:13.800 --> 01:03:18.320] So, how I approach resourcing myself in my life is I just don't hold back.
[01:03:18.960 --> 01:03:26.800] Every time I overinvest or invest ahead, again, you don't have to go wild with this, but there have been, there have been years where I'm like, I'm going wild.
[01:03:26.800 --> 01:03:39.680] I'm like, when I think about like the percentage of my profits or, you know, that have gone towards like pouring right back into me, the return on that investment, it is always worth it.
[01:03:39.680 --> 01:03:41.200] It is always worth it.
[01:03:41.200 --> 01:03:44.400] It always exceeds my expectations.
[01:03:44.400 --> 01:04:01.040] Because when we, when we feel supported, when we feel unalone, when we feel healthy, when we feel well, and we feel like there's a whole squad, a whole team around us that is helping to hold us in that way, then we're operating, I think, the way that humans were actually meant to operate, which is, you know, we talked about Texas Village.
[01:04:01.040 --> 01:04:06.800] It really does, but we're not set up in this system, in this society to experience what we should be.
[01:04:06.800 --> 01:04:13.520] So we have to unfortunately, deeply unfortunately, there's a paywall between us and our wholeness in this way.
[01:04:13.520 --> 01:04:22.080] But if we have the privilege of approaching that paywall and inserting, you know, our credit card here, our cash here, do it.
[01:04:22.080 --> 01:04:26.320] I do it every single time because the payout for me is exponential.
[01:04:26.320 --> 01:04:33.200] I've never, I have never invested, even the things that were like, the content that I got from it was just like, okay, or whatever.
[01:04:33.440 --> 01:04:40.640] But there's usually at least one strong nugget that changed something real because that's what I'm going to make of every investment that I take for myself, every opportunity.
[01:04:40.640 --> 01:04:45.440] So everything makes me, it forwards me, it expands me, it makes me more money.
[01:04:45.760 --> 01:04:49.280] I've never experienced an investment in myself that didn't pay out ever.
[01:04:49.600 --> 01:05:10.280] And you had a recent episode about this because what I find myself in a boat of, and some of you listening may also feel this way, is when you've done all the things and you've checked all the boxes and you're trying your hardest to do everything you can, right, for resourcing yourself and you still feel burnt out.
[01:05:10.280 --> 01:05:12.920] Like, is this like a series you're going to do?
[01:05:12.920 --> 01:05:16.360] I know that that episode addressed it, but I'm like, are you going to work?
[01:05:16.360 --> 01:05:20.360] Are you going to help us work through this season on your show?
[01:05:21.320 --> 01:05:23.000] How do we get past it?
[01:05:23.000 --> 01:05:23.400] Yeah.
[01:05:23.640 --> 01:05:28.040] Well, that's when you're doing so many things and you think you're resourcing yourself.
[01:05:28.920 --> 01:05:29.400] Yeah.
[01:05:29.720 --> 01:05:33.160] So this gets back to some of the things that we were talking about earlier.
[01:05:33.160 --> 01:05:41.240] I think the episode that you're referencing is when I was kind of making a comparison to that, or I was referencing that book, 10X is Easier Than 2X.
[01:05:41.240 --> 01:05:41.560] Yes.
[01:05:41.560 --> 01:05:42.040] Yes.
[01:05:42.040 --> 01:05:42.760] Yes.
[01:05:42.760 --> 01:05:43.320] Okay.
[01:05:43.320 --> 01:05:56.040] So I don't know if you're listeners, watchers are familiar with the book, 10X is Easier Than 2X, but very high level, the premise of that book is that in order to make 2X changes, which is what we typically shoot for, it's like, I'm going to double my revenue.
[01:05:56.040 --> 01:05:57.640] I'm going to double my list.
[01:05:57.640 --> 01:05:59.320] I'm going to double whatever it might be.
[01:05:59.320 --> 01:06:00.200] That's big, right?
[01:06:00.200 --> 01:06:01.240] It's really hard.
[01:06:01.560 --> 01:06:05.080] But what that means is you're just going to double your effort to get double the outcome.
[01:06:05.080 --> 01:06:09.160] 10X means I fundamentally shift what my business does.
[01:06:09.320 --> 01:06:14.520] Oftentimes it means a lot of carving away of things of like, what do I need to release a whole new identity?
[01:06:14.520 --> 01:06:21.560] Like if you think about the DNA of a business has to actually change if it says we're actually going to go from where we are today to 10X.
[01:06:21.560 --> 01:06:22.040] Yes.
[01:06:22.040 --> 01:06:23.800] You have to, you have to become different.
[01:06:23.800 --> 01:06:25.800] You can't just double your effort to get 10X.
[01:06:26.040 --> 01:06:27.080] That was an episode.
[01:06:27.080 --> 01:06:27.640] Yeah.
[01:06:27.640 --> 01:06:28.120] Yes.
[01:06:28.120 --> 01:06:29.160] So that's the same thing.
[01:06:29.240 --> 01:06:30.680] That's the identity piece.
[01:06:30.680 --> 01:06:31.480] Yes.
[01:06:31.480 --> 01:06:32.040] It is that.
[01:06:32.200 --> 01:06:34.200] If you're not working at that level, that's it.
[01:06:34.200 --> 01:06:40.520] If you're not working at that identity level, you're never going to get that 10X because that is what's fundamental to us.
[01:06:40.520 --> 01:06:44.040] It's like it shapes the way that we see the problems or the opportunities in front of us.
[01:06:44.040 --> 01:06:47.440] It shapes the way that we view ourselves, our self-concept I talk a lot about.
[01:06:47.840 --> 01:06:57.760] So if you're not doing that work around your self-concept, around how you perceive the world, you're not going to get that 10X payout.
[01:06:57.760 --> 01:07:00.000] So at some point, you're just fully optimized, baby.
[01:07:00.080 --> 01:07:10.080] Like, I just want everybody to know, you know, you've got, if you have, like, I've got meal delivery or housekeepers and nannies and laundry service, lady, like, then that's it.
[01:07:10.080 --> 01:07:10.960] You tapped out.
[01:07:10.960 --> 01:07:12.080] There's nothing wrong with you.
[01:07:12.080 --> 01:07:16.400] It's just you've reached, you've reached the pinnacle, you know, like you can't go any higher.
[01:07:16.400 --> 01:07:17.280] And that that's okay.
[01:07:17.280 --> 01:07:20.720] So now it's about, okay, there are some things that I'm holding on to.
[01:07:20.720 --> 01:07:26.480] There's a, there are ways that I am being that I've got to get into.
[01:07:26.480 --> 01:07:29.040] I've got to get into in a really, in a really, real way.
[01:07:29.040 --> 01:07:38.640] I also just want to name one quick caveat, though, that's really important: is that I will never separate this from the capitalist system that demands us to always be on and to be exhausted all the time.
[01:07:38.800 --> 01:07:43.040] There's a huge, huge driving factor as to why you still feel exhausted, babes, as well.
[01:07:43.520 --> 01:07:44.160] Exactly.
[01:07:44.160 --> 01:07:54.640] Because when a system makes lets kids get out of school at 3:30 and then the workday, it's a different, like it, it was never meant for us to make it make sense.
[01:07:54.640 --> 01:07:55.040] Okay.
[01:07:55.360 --> 01:08:07.200] But that identity piece, from what I understand of it right now, at the level I'm at, you know, it's like, first of all, you cannot see the identity you've chosen to occupy because it's another blind spot.
[01:08:07.200 --> 01:08:11.600] So, but if you fundamentally think, you know, I'm a solopreneur, I do this.
[01:08:11.600 --> 01:08:12.400] It's okay.
[01:08:12.400 --> 01:08:13.040] I can do this.
[01:08:13.280 --> 01:08:15.280] I can do a little bit of this, a little bit of that.
[01:08:15.280 --> 01:08:18.000] It's like, no, you cannot.
[01:08:18.320 --> 01:08:25.040] You have to fundamentally shift and start to operate differently.
[01:08:25.040 --> 01:08:33.560] And what that looks like could be many different things, but I'm just sharing with you guys, like, what I took away from that and what might be helpful for all of you as well.
[01:08:33.720 --> 01:08:41.880] Like, a lot of us actually need to start to dismantle some of the identities we've taken on unknowingly.
[01:08:41.880 --> 01:08:42.440] Yes.
[01:08:42.440 --> 01:08:42.840] Yes.
[01:08:42.840 --> 01:08:47.720] That's when you know you get into stuff like, what is my relationship to help?
[01:08:48.040 --> 01:08:50.120] What is my relationship to risk?
[01:08:50.120 --> 01:08:51.800] What is my relationship to?
[01:08:51.800 --> 01:08:53.720] And those aren't optimizing things.
[01:08:53.720 --> 01:08:54.840] Those are identity things.
[01:08:54.840 --> 01:08:55.400] It's old.
[01:08:55.560 --> 01:08:57.400] And stories we tell ourselves.
[01:08:57.400 --> 01:09:01.640] Every time one of my friends talks to me, she's like, you know, I'm not a risk taker.
[01:09:01.640 --> 01:09:07.720] And I want to be like, that's a story from the rooftops.
[01:09:08.040 --> 01:09:10.440] Because, like, honestly, I don't identify as that either.
[01:09:10.440 --> 01:09:12.360] I don't identify as a risk taker.
[01:09:12.360 --> 01:09:16.840] I'm just living the best life that I have carved out is right for me.
[01:09:18.040 --> 01:09:18.360] Yeah.
[01:09:18.360 --> 01:09:22.920] We're walking around with a lot of invisible I ams, and it's about doing the work.
[01:09:22.920 --> 01:09:24.120] And I'm not.
[01:09:24.120 --> 01:09:25.080] And I'm not.
[01:09:25.080 --> 01:09:25.960] Yes, exactly.
[01:09:25.960 --> 01:09:29.480] And it's about doing the work to make those things a lot more visible to you so that you can hold.
[01:09:29.880 --> 01:09:31.480] Oh, that one's holding me back.
[01:09:31.480 --> 01:09:34.680] Or that one's, you know, like, you mean that's not true?
[01:09:34.680 --> 01:09:35.720] Oh, that's not.
[01:09:35.720 --> 01:09:39.320] Oh, and the last thing I'll say, because I know I could talk to Monique forever, y'all.
[01:09:40.840 --> 01:09:44.360] But it's that, yeah, that piece around the help too, right?
[01:09:44.360 --> 01:09:49.960] Like thinking for, because I know I'm doing this work as well, releasing.
[01:09:49.960 --> 01:09:58.120] I, for a long time, felt bad about getting laundry service because I thought my neighbors would look at me like, is she for real?
[01:09:58.120 --> 01:10:01.280] I mean, she got a wash and dryer.
[01:10:00.120 --> 01:10:05.720] Like, I know she can't do her own laundry.
[01:10:06.680 --> 01:10:18.400] Like the stories, allowing yourself, giving yourself permission to do and get help is another identity shift as well.
[01:10:14.840 --> 01:10:21.520] So, Monique, God bless you and the work you are doing.
[01:10:21.840 --> 01:10:24.960] We are going to transition into a quick lightning round.
[01:10:24.960 --> 01:10:26.160] Are you ready?
[01:10:26.160 --> 01:10:27.120] Okay.
[01:10:31.520 --> 01:10:32.800] All right, number one.
[01:10:32.800 --> 01:10:37.680] What is a resource that is really helping you in your business these days that you can share with us?
[01:10:37.680 --> 01:10:41.760] I mean, I guess my assistant, I'm like, I don't know what else to say, honestly.
[01:10:41.760 --> 01:10:42.400] My assistant.
[01:10:42.480 --> 01:10:43.440] How did you find your assistant?
[01:10:43.440 --> 01:10:44.640] How'd you find your assistant?
[01:10:44.640 --> 01:10:54.800] Y'all, my dirty little secret is that my husband found my assistant because he was working on something and found, I don't know what online marketplace or whatever labor spot.
[01:10:56.240 --> 01:10:58.080] And he was just raving about her.
[01:10:58.080 --> 01:10:59.760] I was like, oh, let me holler at her real quick.
[01:11:00.640 --> 01:11:01.920] Snatched her right on up.
[01:11:01.920 --> 01:11:02.720] I did.
[01:11:02.720 --> 01:11:04.480] That's a partnership.
[01:11:07.200 --> 01:11:12.080] Who is a black woman entrepreneur who you'd want to switch places with for a day?
[01:11:12.080 --> 01:11:12.800] And why?
[01:11:12.800 --> 01:11:14.960] Non-celebrity, if possible?
[01:11:14.960 --> 01:11:16.800] Someone I'm really curious about.
[01:11:16.800 --> 01:11:17.920] Oh my gosh, the editor.
[01:11:18.160 --> 01:11:19.840] Well, she's not an entrepreneur, but I mean, I don't know.
[01:11:19.840 --> 01:11:20.880] I think of her as one.
[01:11:20.880 --> 01:11:22.960] I was going to say the editor-in-chief of Essence.
[01:11:22.960 --> 01:11:25.280] But I think she's so fascinating.
[01:11:25.280 --> 01:11:31.680] I think that the way she moves through spaces so unapologetically, so boldly, I like the way she plays.
[01:11:31.760 --> 01:11:32.240] I like words.
[01:11:32.240 --> 01:11:34.720] I like the way she places words when she's speaking.
[01:11:34.720 --> 01:11:36.640] And I was just, I'm just curious about her.
[01:11:36.640 --> 01:11:39.920] Like, I would love to, yeah, I'd love to see what it's like in her world.
[01:11:39.920 --> 01:11:45.440] Number three, what is a non-negotiable part of your day these days?
[01:11:45.440 --> 01:11:46.400] Oh, yes.
[01:11:46.880 --> 01:11:51.840] So I wake up at 5 a.m., not on some crazy strange line.
[01:11:52.000 --> 01:11:52.800] No, no.
[01:11:53.120 --> 01:11:55.600] I have been an early bird since I was a little kid.
[01:11:55.600 --> 01:11:58.400] Like, I'm also knocked out by like 9 p.m.
[01:11:58.560 --> 01:11:59.600] Like late, I'm sleepy.
[01:11:59.600 --> 01:12:01.080] Like, like I have grandpa hours.
[01:12:01.400 --> 01:12:10.120] So, but having that early morning moment to myself is truly sometimes I work out, sometimes I sit still, sometimes I scroll, sometimes I talk to God.
[01:12:10.120 --> 01:12:10.840] It doesn't matter.
[01:12:10.840 --> 01:12:12.280] I just need a moment.
[01:12:12.280 --> 01:12:13.000] Yes.
[01:12:13.560 --> 01:12:14.200] Yes.
[01:12:14.520 --> 01:12:20.440] Number four, what is a personal trait that has really contributed to your success?
[01:12:21.080 --> 01:12:28.520] So on the, is it the, it's not the Enneagram, one of those personality tests, it says that I'm a wooer, like W-O-O-Wooer.
[01:12:30.600 --> 01:12:32.760] I like to woo people.
[01:12:33.080 --> 01:12:34.920] And so that takes, right?
[01:12:35.000 --> 01:12:36.280] It takes me back to my early years.
[01:12:36.280 --> 01:12:37.800] I'm like, that's why I was successful.
[01:12:37.800 --> 01:12:39.720] I'm just working the room.
[01:12:39.960 --> 01:12:40.360] I do.
[01:12:40.360 --> 01:12:43.400] I like having little romanticized moments with people.
[01:12:43.400 --> 01:12:43.800] Yeah.
[01:12:43.800 --> 01:12:45.560] It helps a lot with my work.
[01:12:45.560 --> 01:12:47.320] I'm telling you, it's a gift.
[01:12:47.320 --> 01:12:48.680] And I could see that.
[01:12:48.920 --> 01:12:49.720] Just talking to you.
[01:12:49.720 --> 01:12:50.520] It's all over you.
[01:12:50.520 --> 01:12:51.480] It's in your essence.
[01:12:51.480 --> 01:12:52.040] All right.
[01:12:52.440 --> 01:13:03.560] And then finally, what is your parting advice for fellow women entrepreneurs who want to go out on their own eventually, but are worried about losing a steady paycheck?
[01:13:03.880 --> 01:13:06.360] Insist on steadiness.
[01:13:06.360 --> 01:13:08.520] Insist on stability.
[01:13:08.520 --> 01:13:10.840] Insist on being held.
[01:13:11.320 --> 01:13:19.720] Like, just have, trust that you can have the most extreme of high standards for yourself and move.
[01:13:19.720 --> 01:13:21.080] Like, insist on it.
[01:13:21.080 --> 01:13:24.920] Know that you, you can insist on that and set those boundaries, set those standards, and the world will respond.
[01:13:24.920 --> 01:13:26.120] You'll repel what needs to be repelled.
[01:13:26.120 --> 01:13:27.720] You'll attract what you need to retract.
[01:13:27.720 --> 01:13:29.880] It's just how it works.
[01:13:30.200 --> 01:13:31.960] Oh, I love that.
[01:13:31.960 --> 01:13:34.200] I, ooh, I needed that.
[01:13:34.200 --> 01:13:34.840] Oh, my God.
[01:13:34.840 --> 01:13:36.120] I got chills all over me.
[01:13:36.120 --> 01:13:37.880] I got chills all over me.
[01:13:37.880 --> 01:13:41.480] That was just the perfect note to end this conversation on.
[01:13:41.480 --> 01:13:43.480] And, you know, Monique, is there anything we didn't touch on?
[01:13:43.480 --> 01:13:46.640] I don't usually ask this, but I just feel like you have so much to offer.
[01:13:46.800 --> 01:13:48.640] So, is there anything we didn't touch on?
[01:13:48.640 --> 01:13:51.280] Any last words of wisdom that you just want to share?
[01:13:51.280 --> 01:13:52.960] I'm so grateful to have been here.
[01:13:52.960 --> 01:13:54.000] I think I'll say two things.
[01:13:54.000 --> 01:14:00.960] Number one, for anyone who's coming to Rachel Rogers' conference this summer in June in California, I'll be there.
[01:14:00.960 --> 01:14:02.400] So I'd love to meet you if you happen to be.
[01:14:02.400 --> 01:14:04.400] I know your audience might represent a good point.
[01:14:04.640 --> 01:14:04.960] Yes, yeah.
[01:14:04.960 --> 01:14:06.800] We had Rachel on just a few weeks ago.
[01:14:06.800 --> 01:14:07.680] So all right.
[01:14:07.680 --> 01:14:08.880] So I'll be at her conference.
[01:14:08.880 --> 01:14:10.080] I'd love to meet you.
[01:14:10.480 --> 01:14:26.400] And then, number two, as a parting piece of wisdom, one of the things that I am constantly sitting with and sharing with my clients, and I hope this unburdens you as well, is that whatever it is that you're facing down next, whatever challenge it is that you're trying to take on or figure out, you don't need more.
[01:14:26.400 --> 01:14:28.160] You're not deficient in anything.
[01:14:28.160 --> 01:14:29.520] There's no deficit within you.
[01:14:29.520 --> 01:14:34.320] You don't need to take on anything new, tack on anything new, build yourself up more.
[01:14:34.320 --> 01:14:35.840] Usually, you need to release.
[01:14:35.840 --> 01:14:38.640] So focus on what you need to let go.
[01:14:38.640 --> 01:14:41.760] And yeah, let that be your energy.
[01:14:41.760 --> 01:14:43.600] Let yourself release.
[01:14:44.240 --> 01:14:49.680] I'm telling you, it's like you're always just, you're just speaking life over me, always.
[01:14:49.680 --> 01:14:53.040] Like, I have been in that energy of like, what else can I do?
[01:14:53.040 --> 01:14:54.240] What else can I learn?
[01:14:54.240 --> 01:14:55.520] How can I figure this out?
[01:14:55.520 --> 01:14:57.760] And it's like, you're enough.
[01:14:57.760 --> 01:14:59.360] You have it in you.
[01:14:59.360 --> 01:15:01.280] What can you release?
[01:15:02.240 --> 01:15:03.360] It's true.
[01:15:03.360 --> 01:15:03.680] It's true.
[01:15:03.680 --> 01:15:05.200] It's true, release, y'all.
[01:15:05.200 --> 01:15:09.280] And so, where can people connect with you after this episode?
[01:15:09.280 --> 01:15:10.000] Yes.
[01:15:10.240 --> 01:15:14.320] So, certainly, I'm on mostly just Instagram, a little bit of LinkedIn as well.
[01:15:14.320 --> 01:15:15.040] But Monique R.
[01:15:15.040 --> 01:15:16.000] Shields is my handle.
[01:15:16.000 --> 01:15:17.200] I can't forget that R.
[01:15:17.520 --> 01:15:20.000] And my website is moniquershields.com.
[01:15:20.000 --> 01:15:24.800] You can learn all the things there, connect to all the stuff, and even apply to work with me as well.
[01:15:24.800 --> 01:15:25.440] Yes.
[01:15:25.440 --> 01:15:28.320] Thank you, Monique, so much for being in the guest chair.
[01:15:28.320 --> 01:15:31.240] You guys also listen to Ambition Without Compromise.
[01:15:31.240 --> 01:15:36.200] Get your whole life every month, every, you know, every other week, like I do.
[01:15:36.840 --> 01:15:40.280] And with that, I will talk to y'all next week.
[01:15:41.880 --> 01:15:44.920] Hey, guys, thanks for listening to Side Hustle Pro.
[01:15:44.920 --> 01:15:49.640] If you like the show, be sure to subscribe, rate, and review on Apple Podcasts.
[01:15:49.640 --> 01:15:53.400] It helps other side hustlers just like you to find the show.
[01:15:53.400 --> 01:15:58.040] And if you want to hear more from me, you can follow me on Instagram at SideHustle Pro.
[01:15:58.040 --> 01:16:05.160] Plus, sign up for my six-foot Saturday newsletter at sidehustlepro.co/slash newsletter.
[01:16:05.160 --> 01:16:12.520] When you sign up, you will receive weekly nuggets from me, including what I'm up to, personal lessons, and my business tip of the week.
[01:16:12.520 --> 01:16:17.240] Again, that's sidehustlepro.co/slash newsletter to sign up.
[01:16:17.240 --> 01:16:18.680] Talk to you soon.
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