The Ramsey Show

There's Always Hope When Facing Financial Hardship

February 13, 2026

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  • When combining finances in marriage, especially second marriages, self-awareness regarding control issues is crucial, and couples should use tools like budgeting and specific communication phrases ("The story I'm choosing to make up is...") to navigate conflict. 
  • For couples with high income and substantial savings, prioritizing the elimination of debt (like a mortgage) quickly, even over maintaining a lower monthly payment for perceived risk mitigation, removes long-term financial risk. 
  • Debt stemming from addictive behaviors like gambling requires addressing the underlying behavior and shame before successfully executing a debt payoff plan, as financial recovery alone will fail without personal change. 
  • When navigating divorce and financial separation, it is crucial to prioritize future freedom over clinging to past dreams associated with shared property. 
  • Paying off a mortgage early, even with low interest rates, is celebrated as a massive achievement that provides significant life peace and options, as demonstrated by the young couple who paid off their $291,000 home in four years. 
  • For individuals struggling with chronic debt patterns, taking over financial control with their explicit agreement, freezing credit, and providing emotional support are necessary steps to ensure stability in their later years. 
  • Couples facing deep marital resentment, especially concerning division of labor and financial alignment, should seek professional third-party counseling to rebuild their relationship from the ground up. 
  • When receiving a large, unexpected sum of money like a settlement, adhere to the three buckets of money—give, save, and spend—and avoid major lifestyle changes for at least six to nine months to ensure long-term financial stability. 
  • Couples entering a new phase of wealth, such as receiving a large settlement, must engage in premarital counseling to learn how to handle the impending change in their relationship dynamics. 

Segments

Combining Finances in Marriage
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(00:00:24)
  • Key Takeaway: Combining finances should primarily focus on primary checking and savings accounts, excluding retirement assets, and pre-marriage budgeting practice, like for a wedding, serves as a valuable test run.
  • Summary: When merging finances, only operational accounts like checking and savings should be combined; retirement accounts should remain separate to maximize individual benefits. For couples with control issues, the controlling partner should draft the initial budget and then intentionally allow the spouse to make significant changes to foster collaboration. During conflict, framing disagreements using the phrase, “The story I’m choosing to make up is…” invites dialogue rather than confrontation.
Mortgage Refinance Conflict
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(00:10:00)
  • Key Takeaway: When a couple disagrees on mortgage refinancing (15-year vs. 30-year), the option that allows for the fastest debt elimination should be chosen if the couple has significant cash reserves, as the risk mitigation sought by the cautious spouse can be achieved faster.
  • Summary: A couple with a $334,000 mortgage balance and $176,000 in savings should aggressively pay down the debt, potentially using over $100,000 from savings to reduce the principal immediately. The fear of job loss, often rooted in past scarcity experiences, can be mitigated by aggressively attacking the debt to remove the largest monthly obligation quickly. Given their high income ($300k+), they can likely eliminate the mortgage in under two years by choosing the most aggressive payoff strategy.
Debt Payoff from Gambling
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(00:22:19)
  • Key Takeaway: Successfully paying off debt, especially when linked to addictive behavior like gambling, requires focusing immediately on stopping the harmful behavior and reframing the payoff journey as a path to freedom rather than self-punishment.
  • Summary: The caller has $66,800 in consumer debt plus a $44,000 HELOC, but their combined income of $235,000 allows for rapid payoff, potentially within 18 months. It is critical to stop the harmful behavior (gambling) immediately, even before fully understanding the root cause, to prevent relapse. The motivation for debt payoff must be self-worth and freedom, not self-loathing or viewing the process as deserved punishment.
Car Debt and Income Vulnerability
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(00:44:07)
  • Key Takeaway: A person earning $31,700 annually cannot sustain a $529 car payment and a $252 ATV payment; immediate action must be taken to sell the over-leveraged vehicle and pursue more stable, full-time employment.
  • Summary: The caller owes $28,000 on a car worth $18,000, creating $10,000 in negative equity that should be covered by a small loan after selling the vehicle for $18,000. The caller must prioritize finding stable, full-time work over coasting on part-time gigs to build the necessary financial security. Selling the ATV should be approached by saving the difference if the negative equity is smaller than the car’s.
Finances During Divorce
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(00:53:44)
  • Key Takeaway: When divorce occurs, the relationship immediately transitions into a business transaction where the departing spouse no longer has a vote in decisions, necessitating the hiring of an attorney to establish firm boundaries.
  • Summary: The grieving process for a marriage ending must be separated from the immediate need to establish concrete financial boundaries, as the departing spouse forfeits their right to dictate terms. The caller must be brutally honest about whether they can mathematically afford to keep the marital home, especially if it is surrounded by the ex-spouse’s family land. Hiring a good attorney is essential to fight for the client’s best interests during this critical negotiation phase.
Divorce Property and Future Freedom
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(00:59:01)
  • Key Takeaway: Future financial freedom for the divorced party outweighs sentimental attachment to property surrounded by ex-family.
  • Summary: The speaker advises against keeping property tied to an ex-family due to potential future constraints on selling or moving. The life and dreams associated with the previous situation are over and must be grieved and discarded for future planning. Making a bad financial decision now can trap the individual for the next decade.
Divorce Asset Liquidation Advice
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(01:01:37)
  • Key Takeaway: Pulling money penalty-free from a 401k for a down payment is discouraged when income is low ($45k); renting for a year to grieve and settle is recommended instead.
  • Summary: The caller inquired about using $106,000 from a 401k divorce settlement for a down payment. The advice given was against liquidating retirement funds, especially with a low income. The caller should rent for six to nine months to grieve the situation before making a major housing decision.
Sponsor Spot: NetSuite AI Benefits
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(01:03:32)
  • Key Takeaway: NetSuite’s integrated system, enhanced with AI, automates busy work and flags risks in real-time, allowing business owners to make confident decisions.
  • Summary: NetSuite integrates accounting, inventory, CRM, and payroll into one system, used by over 43,000 businesses. The AI component automates tasks, identifies inventory issues, and spots cash flow problems proactively. This integration reduces pressure by ensuring business numbers are accurate and accessible.
Debt-Free Scream: House Paid Off
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(01:05:01)
  • Key Takeaway: A couple paid off their $150,000 house in 47 months on a combined income of $120K to $145K by aggressively attacking the mortgage.
  • Summary: Kyle and Sarah paid off their $330,000 valued house in under four years, starting the goal shortly after buying it in 2021. They put down $115,000 to keep their mortgage payment under 25% of their take-home pay. Their success was driven by relentless focus, tracking progress on spreadsheets, and celebrating milestones along the way.
Sponsor Spot: Car Maintenance Trust
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(01:14:51)
  • Key Takeaway: When buying used cars, regular and proper maintenance is essential for longevity, and Christian Brothers Automotive offers transparent service backed by a nationwide warranty.
  • Summary: The recommendation for car buyers is always to purchase used vehicles unless they are extremely wealthy. Christian Brothers Automotive is endorsed for providing simple, honest, and transparent repair services. Every repair comes with a three-year or 36,000-mile warranty.
Ask Ramsey AI Tool Promotion
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(01:16:24)
  • Key Takeaway: The new free AI tool, Ask Ramsey, provides answers to specific money questions based on proven Ramsey principles.
  • Summary: The show promotes its new free AI tool, Ask Ramsey, which was trained on money-proven principles. Listeners can ask specific questions via the website or links in the description. This tool offers personalized guidance when a live call cannot be taken.
Enthusiast Car Purchase Dilemma
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(01:17:11)
  • Key Takeaway: A financially secure caller wanting a $35,000 luxury car must examine if the purchase is driven by genuine desire or an attempt to escape boredom from routine family life.
  • Summary: The caller, earning $180K with $45K cash savings and a $200K mortgage, sought permission to buy a $35,000 BMW sedan despite already owning two SUVs. The hosts advised focusing on the motivation behind the purchase, suggesting that if it stems from boredom, it will become an expensive way to numb out. Financially, the purchase is feasible, but the relationship and personal fulfillment aspect requires deeper self-examination.
Managing Elderly Parent’s Finances
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(01:26:40)
  • Key Takeaway: Taking over an elderly parent’s finances requires the adult child to possess significant emotional fortitude to handle the parent’s inevitable negative reactions to boundaries.
  • Summary: An 83-year-old mother with $40,000 in debt and only $1,400/month Social Security income needs intervention due to a lifetime pattern of debt. The proposed solution involves paying off debt, taking control of income via financial power of attorney, and implementing a strict budget. The caller must prepare for the psychological backlash, similar to dealing with a teenager, when imposing necessary boundaries.
Sponsor Spot: EveryDollar Budgeting Plan
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(01:36:00)
  • Key Takeaway: EveryDollar is promoted as more than a budgeting app; it is a personalized plan that coaches users daily to find extra money and accelerate wealth building.
  • Summary: The EveryDollar app now includes the Baby Steps plan built directly into the platform. It provides personalized recommendations and coaching to help users free up money faster. Users can download the app to build a plan based on their current financial status.
Stopping Retirement Contributions Early
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(01:36:37)
  • Key Takeaway: Continuing retirement contributions is strongly encouraged even when projections show reaching financial goals, as the long-term compounding effect and the principle of balanced giving/saving/spending outweigh short-term vacation spending.
  • Summary: A 50-year-old caller with $850,000 saved and a $215,000 combined income questioned stopping $20,000 annual contributions to take more vacations. The hosts emphasized that the gap created by stopping contributions widens significantly over a longer time horizon (e.g., age 80). Continuing to invest supports the balanced financial principle of saving, alongside spending and giving.
Selling an Underwater Rental Property
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(01:41:38)
  • Key Takeaway: Foreclosure or short sale should be avoided; accepting a $30,000 loss on an underwater rental property is preferable to continuing to cash-flow a negative $850 monthly payment.
  • Summary: The couple bought a $350,000 townhouse that is now worth $325,000, resulting in a $30,000 cash loss after selling fees. The property was losing $850 monthly while rented, and they are also dealing with a complex living situation in their primary residence. The immediate action recommended is to sell the property as quickly as possible to stop the ongoing financial drain.
Debt-Free Scream: House Paid Off (Part 2)
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(01:46:43)
  • Key Takeaway: A couple paid off their $291,000 house in four years by aggressively increasing income through side hustles, including apartment maintenance and dog sitting, while remaining faithful tithers.
  • Summary: Brandon and Taryn paid off their house in just over four years, increasing their income from $100K to $200K primarily through side jobs. They credit their success to being a unified team, trusting God, and continuing to tithe consistently throughout the process. Their next goal is to move from California to Tennessee to build a barndominium on land.
New Year Planning Promotion
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(01:56:32)
  • Key Takeaway: Effective goal achievement requires a concrete financial plan, not just hopeful promises.
  • Summary: Most people start the new year with financial promises but lack a real plan, leading them to ‘wing it.’ The EveryDollar app is promoted as a game-changer that builds a personalized budget in 15 minutes. The app coaches users daily to find extra money to accelerate debt payoff and wealth building.
Scripture and Mindset Quote
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(01:57:37)
  • Key Takeaway: Divine provision is righteous and kind, complementing an open mindset necessary for success.
  • Summary: The scripture of the day is Psalms 1(45:16)-17, noting that the Lord satisfies the desire of every living thing and is righteous in all His ways. A quote from Frank Zappa emphasizes that the mind must be open to function, like a parachute. This segment encourages listeners to remain open to learning and taking action.
Marital Anger and Resentment
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(01:58:07)
  • Key Takeaway: Deep marital resentment stemming from perceived imbalance requires immediate, structured intervention to prevent the relationship from becoming a constant battlefield.
  • Summary: A caller expressed anger and resentment toward her husband who shifted from a stable corporate job back to a less reliable side hustle, leading to burnout and unmet household needs. The host identified the core issue as a ‘you versus him’ dynamic where one partner is either unwilling or unable to meet the other’s needs. The recommended action is to stop the current dance, declare the marriage needs rebuilding, and seek professional counseling to establish a path forward together.
Large Settlement Financial Guidance
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(02:03:18)
  • Key Takeaway: Sudden, large windfalls like a $3.5 million settlement require strict discipline, a detailed plan, and a six-month waiting period before making major purchases.
  • Summary: A caller expecting a $3.5 million settlement with minimal consumer debt sought advice on managing the sudden wealth. The guidance emphasizes the three buckets of money: give, save, and spend, urging a hold on major purchases for six to nine months to emotionally process the change. The caller, who is 33 and planning marriage, was advised to consult a SmartVestor Pro to map out a long-term plan that can change the family tree, and to prioritize premarital counseling due to the wealth impact on the relationship.